tl;dr: I called her today and we have a date on Tuesday.

This Saturday was the last fireworks display of the season in my area and one of the biggest in the country. I went with a friend, who brought more of her friends, each of whom also brought even more friends. So it was this huge mixed set, most of whom were meeting each other for the first time.

We all got together at the train station. Some Japanese women, a few foreign girls including the friend I came with, and at least seven foreign guys. None of the guys displayed any charisma, so I wasn't concerned with them. Most of the girls were cute, though at least two were in LTRs. But one stood out as absolutely delicious and I decided that she'd be my target.

I'll call her Summer. It turns out she's a few years older than me, but she doesn't look a day over 20. Her English is better than she lets on. She has a smile that could stop a war, or more likely start one.

The group was basically waiting for everyone to be gathered at once so we could all introduce ourselves. I didn't feel like waiting. I locked eyes with her and smiled, and she introduced herself. I shook her hand, and held on for slightly longer than what is culturally expected. After that she stepped closer, right into my personal space. I like that.

More people arrived and I met the rest of the group. "How do you all know each other" works like a charm again. I mingle and DHV. Socializing has become easier for me, but honestly I didn't care about talking to these other people much. Maybe if they weren't so boring, or if my target wasn't so hot, I would've talked to them more. But I didn't start learning seduction to find golfing partners or drinking buddies, after all.

Before long, we all got crammed into a crowded train. Somehow I managed to get Summer in one corner of the car while the rest of the group was in the middle or towards the other end. I don't even remember planning it that way; it felt almost instinctual. Anyway, we spent 40 minutes more or less isolated from mutual acquaintances and in close physical proximity.

I decide to try out the "seductive listening" thing from 60 Years of Challenge. I think it worked. We only broke eye contact like twice the entire time, and then only to listen to and poke fun at my super-extrovert friend elsewhere in the car rambling on in terrible but enthusiastic Japanese. Even during pauses in the conversation it didn't seem awkward.

Naturally, I learned a lot about her, and we have quite a few things in common. I made mental notes of all these things and turned them into activity ideas. For example, she's addicted to tetris, and she likes seeing movies. I let her know that there's a mall near me that has an arcade with a giant tetris game, and a theater that has a regular "couples day" discount. Boom, future date in the making.

When we got off the train, Summer stuck by me the entire time. We passed some girls in summer kimonos they were wearing loose at the top, exposing their shoulders and a bit of cleavage. She pointed them out to me. "Look at that! I've never seen girls in that style in real life."

"Really? I see that all the time at these festivals. Kind of naughty, huh?"

"Yeah. I bet you like naughty girls, don't you?"

The old me would have protested vigorously; oh no, I'm a gentleman. But at this point, I imagined a blaring noise in my head like a missile warning. Incoming shit test. Deploy countermeasures.

"Heh, sure. I bet you'd look good like that. Let's see some shoulder!"

"No way! (giggles)"

We found an empty spot to watch the show amongst thousands of other people. I mingled a bit more while everything (tarps, food, drinks, etc.) was being set up, but I made sure to arrange it so she and I were seated behind everyone else in the group facing the fireworks. From then I just slowly but steadily escalated. By the end of the show, I had her leaning against me with my arm around her.

There were a few points during pauses in the display that we looked into each other's eyes, and I think I could have gone in for a kiss. It was a very intense, almost magnetic pull that I haven't felt in longer than I care to admit. But with all our mutual acquaintances right near by, I figured it would be better logistically to keep building tension instead.

The show ended, and we all started walking back. She and I lagged behind the group a bit; after sitting on the ground for so long, she said her ass had fallen asleep. I told her I could wake it up for her. She lol'ed. I figured this was a good a time as any, so…

"Oh, before I forget, how about you give me your number?"

"Of course!"

I liked that answer. Much better than "um, okay" or "I guess so." We continued to talk after that. By the it felt like we had known each other for a long time; she said as much. Part of my brain still couldn't accept that things were progressing so fast, but the rest of my brain was enjoying the ride.

Because of the crowds, we got to the station late, and we all had to run to catch our last trains home. Since she was heading back in another direction with some friends, I wasn't able to kiss close her like I wanted. But I made it clear that we'd meet again soon.

What I did right:

  • Got her digits! Planned a date!

What I need to work on:

  • I probably should have mingled with the group a bit more, if only to see if she'd chase me or work for my attention. But to be fair, when she smiled at me, the rest of the world seemed to disappear. And she spent most of the evening doing that.

  • I think I could have escalated faster. She certainly seemed receptive to it, but all the other people around were kind of a wildcard. I've read that it can be good to keep pushing boundaries until you get a clear "no," but it didn't feel right to risk it. I bet I could have been holding her hand starting at the train ride instead of the end of the evening, though.

  • Meeting her as a friend of a friend rather than as a complete stranger made things much easier. I have yet to get a number from a completely cold approach, so I'm not about to rest on my laurels.

Thanks for reading. Feedback is greatly appreciated.