First FR - Taking the "that guy" vibe way too far, #-closed but pissed her off

Friends band was playing on a weeknight at a local dive bar, decide to go. My friends didnt want to come so I figured Id go alone and see if I could sarge solo. I get there and get a call out of the blue from two girls from my uni who had seen me email out about the show and decided to come. HB6 and 4, respectively. Got in, had a lot of funny banter, just being that guy showing up with two girls - frankly I wasnt interested in either, though I felt some attraction with the 6. Saw a really drunk HB8 and made eye contact like a boss, then went "You're looking for the bathroom - it's over there" / "Thanks, you're awesome" / "No, you're awesome. High five" and we did. Later she comes up to me and asks me if i'm gay (i've been dancing ridiculously the whole night) and instead of thinking on my feet, I just froze her out as she was really wasted/sloppy and I wanst having any of it: "No." "That sucks because i want to dance with you but i have aboyfriend. You're not gay?" "No, and i'm not about to be your gay friend." "Well can you pretend?" "I don't do that." Just wasnt having any of it... .
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. I'm that guy who loves to dance solo and have a good time, and I find it often works to get girls to open me. HB7 and HB7.5 come over and want to join our dance group, so we all get down (me, four girls...dont give a fuck) After the show I start engaging with the 7 and 7.5, with the latter as my target as the former was giving me really cold vibes. We joke about names, I say my last name whic his pretty funny and she doenst believe me, so I bet her a drink it's true - we end up getting each other drinks. The vibe is banter-y and fun, and she loves Sonic the Hedgehog and is generally pretty cool. I get her number with the pretext we need to go to this other show, etc etc. I introduce her to my friend in the band and things start going south - I'm tired and out of state, theyre talking and I'm third wheeled, and I've really run the "outgoing loud guy" thing into the ground and having a tough time keeping her engaged. I'm pretty sure at some point i pissed her off. I bounce out. .
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Takeaway: I need to find a way to think on my feet more - my default is to banter/neg when i cant think of anything else to do, and just be kind of "that guy" - it's an easy thing to hide behind. I just need to learn other modes of conversation to slip into better I have a copy of The Game and have also heard about NLP and am considering actually studying because I haven't studied any theory methodically, figuring I'd just use my natural but unfulfilling game + what I learn on Seddit. I am finding more and more there are things i need to UNlearn. This night exemplified that. .
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2nd FR: Compliance testing a cute girl. Built up very, very solid attraction but didnt capitalize for various reasons. DJing an event for my school - it's something I've been working up to for a really long time, invested a lot of time and money into getting everything set right. I arrive to set up and I'm fucking frazzled - tired as hell, equipment needs to be fixed, everyone's dressed dto the nines but me. I decide fuck it, I'll rock the casual look and keep my body language strong. I spend hours troubleshooting stuff, getting things set while hte opener is on. Meanwhile I get approached/opened by HB Pixie, a girl I've met a few times before - first thought she was shy/unassuming, turns out she's witty as hell and someone I need to think very fast around to keep up. I like that, but i'm much, much better at it when there's no anxiety involved.
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We shoot the shit about what music I'll be playing, I rib Pixie for being small and walking around barefoot. She tells me her date is just a friend, not a thing (clear IOI). She introduces me to her friend and I pay attention to the friend more, but I"m still really busy and they wander off. Later on she comes back and I compliance test her "I'm hungry - get me some food" - she spends like 10 minutes making 5 plates of hors d'ouevres for me. Shit yeah, that worked. I crack jokes about her cooking me food, and tell her to sit down. We talk for a while and her friends try to bring her dance, and this is where I'm a fucking idiot: she goes "Nah its cool I'm going to sit with Seddita for a while." Nerves kick in as I realize this is a huge IOI and I say "Go dance" or something to that effect.
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Later on I go dance with their group before my set, but I'm so out of state from the nervousness before going on and everything else that I dont grab her/ spin her around / all that easy shit, and her date does instead. I had a huge opening there and didnt go for it.
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During my set (which i KILLED - had a great time) Pixie comes up, I kino her a ton (double high five, then interlock fingers) but I'm so busy I cant escalate the situation any more. This was a frantic set where I had to swtich the music every 90 seconds, so i didnt have much time for socializing. Afterwards, she comes up and picks up on a topic we'd bantered about earlier, I do OK but dont manage to bounce the conversation enough to disengage her from finding/leaving with her friends.

Still, clear attraction, and I didn't do so poorly that she's unopenable from here on out. I see her rarely, but if i do before the years out itll probably be at a social event I'll be more in state for.
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Takeaway: Must. Work. On. Thinking. On my feet. Same deal as first FR. I also need some serious conversation primers and practice. Maybe I need to get some canned material to interject when I'm flailing. I feel like im consistently scoring a B - surviving, but barely - when i know I'm smart enough and funny enough to be at an A (like when i'm around girls in my social group - i'm a riot.) I just really need to get ot the point where I can read and direct a conversation, thinking three steps ahead, rather than being reactive - which means I stagnate by just trying to be funny all the time, or that loud guy, etc.

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Heavily, heavily considering a bootcamp of some sort - i really just need to get my ass kicked for me, get prodded to try stuff out etc. Most of my male friends have moved away and I dont have any around that would be down to wing, and I'm generally too freaked to solo sarge or do it well when i work up the nerve.

Other random point - I also need to re study kino escalatoin, I have a tendency to go straight for lower back, skipping a few steps - it can freak girls if I havent done the ladder right, havent read her right, or havent re-escalated (e.g. saw Pixie at the end, did arm around waist which she was only somewhat receptive to, should have done full reescalaoitn with arm touch, shoulder, upper back, lower when she re-opened me)