Who can explain how to properly neg a girl

thechort · 2011-09-20T19:51:50+00:00

Don't think about negging, think about teasing. It's a much more useful model. How would you make fun of your friends, playfully? Or a little sister? That's how you do it. Hard to explain I guess. If she's getting offended, you are to close to home, or your topic is too serious. Teasing is a more fun and useful model than negging IMHO. They key is it should be something light and clearly non-serious. Something that you would laugh at if somebody called you out on it. Also important is smiling at this kind of time, and making it sound like a joke, not like a dick.

If you're having that much trouble with it though, just avoid it, or like I said reframe to teasing rather than negging, as I think it's easier to understand and more useful.

cicero11 · 2011-09-21T03:07:24+00:00

A neg is when one brings attention to and feigns subtle disappointment over a slight flaw of a desired female to win her attentions through psychological manipulation of her esteem and her subsequent desire for redemption.

To use the topic of hair color, if you were to make fun of a girl by saying "you dye your hair? thats so lame," that would just make you an asshole and shed probably avoid you for the rest of the night. But, if you were to say "you're hair is so nice, you're a natural blond right?" (even though you know shes not) and then feign a slight disappointment ("oh... I always thought you were") when she replies that shes not, she would feel a need to redeem herself to you, since she failed to stand up to your judgment . To redeem herself, she would then shower you with attention to try to win you over and show you that she's worthy of your approval. On a side note, approval shares a close link with desire. Women have evolved to subconsciously link the two as a means of quickly determining the quality of a potential mate. The more readily you give a woman your approval, the less she'll think of you. This is because the quickness/intensity you approve of her shows the caliber of women you are accustomed to. To demonstrate, imagine you lived in a very nice house for your area and you had two guests visiting. Guest one walked in and marveled at everything "wow a swimming pool, three car garage, 5 bedrooms! this is amazing!" then Guest two came in and was polite but showed no awe about the place. What could you deduce from their behavior? Guest one's marvel is a result of being unaccustomed to a home of such quality, her reaction tells you the homes of her friends and family must pale in comparison. But Guest twos lack of enthusiasm shows she is used to much better. With women its the same thing, if she sees you're not in awe of her shell believe its because you are accustomed to better, if she believes girls much prettier than her are interested in you than shell see it as proof that she should be too.

rustoof · 2011-09-20T21:33:35+00:00

Negs function as a "lets bring us back to reality" moment.

While interacting in the cause of love, hormones and neurotransmitters become overloaded. This is what happens with "oneitis" and feeling that a certain girl is "perfect"

A neg is a break from that fictional frame that your testicles want to put you in and both of you into the real frame.

Thus it is any reference to something that makes a girl less than perfect, but ideally not something that she has deep seated insecurities about.

This is where your qualifications come in. None of us are perfect because we are limited by time. There are just some things people don't have the time for, not because they're bad people, but cause they have other shit to do.

These are the best quality attributes for negs. So for example, since I put a bunch of time into math but not french it would be appropriate to neg me about my meager language skills. Thats because I have traded value for value. It would not be appropriate to neg me about something that truly does bother me, like how I know deep down that im an attention whore because my other two friends talk shit about me but i know im hotter.

Functionally in conversation the neg is designed to just bring everyone back down from the headiness of the "chase" and recognise that there are more important things. Functionally girls will neg you as well (often confused with shit tests, a female neg is simply a way of her letting you know she is aware that your not mr. perfect, which is in fact a sign that her head is on straight)

PetiePal · 2011-09-20T19:17:18+00:00

There's a difference between being insulting and keeping the humor/playfulness in it. Whether it's a gleam of the eye during the delivery or the play on words etc. I'm not the best at describing this but upvote for someone who is!

JoeyPockets · 2011-09-20T19:47:09+00:00

http://redd.it/kkezr

baianobranco · 2011-09-21T04:23:33+00:00

It takes some practice and social awareness. If the girls is even a little bit chubby don't tease her with a fat joke. If she has a weird scar or similar physical abnormality don't tease her about it. Things like that are kind of obvious. However, what really makes it is how flirty you are surrounding the neg and your facial expressions combined with delivery. You want to be playful. Don't neg with an overly serious face or be too dry.

lolwhatsausername · 2011-09-21T06:21:09+00:00

no such things as "specific negs work best", do not try and use contrived negs u read on the internet. It's all situational, live in the moment and TEASE ( not neg ) based on whats going on in your environment. Don't do it because seddit told you to, do it because YOU think its fun. If you're having fun teasing, she's having fun being teased.

edit: if ur teasing her and not insulting her

2011-09-20T20:05:43+00:00

I don't do a ton of it, I tend to just converse in a more straightforward fashion, and it seems to work fine. But I do agree with the guy who said to think of it as teasing more. Also, the hotter the chick, the more you neg. If she's not that hot, neg her very little if at all. And avoid things about their appearance. And definitely avoid weight like the plague, there is absolutely no way you can neg about that in any way ever.

Some things I've used:

"Is your hair dyed?"
"is that a wig?" (only ok on very hot chicks)
says she's staying with a friend..."so you're homeless, is what you're trying to say?" that always get a laugh.

Title	Who can explain how to properly neg a girl
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	13
Comments	13
Date	September 20, 2011 6:45 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/klujs/who_can_explain_how_to_properly_neg_a_girl/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/who-can-explain-how-to-properly-neg-a-girl.1322736 https://theredarchive.com/post/1322736

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