Alright friends, this is kind of a weird one, but I had to share it with you. It's been extremely successful at kicking off my last three relationships, and I'm believing to think it wasn't just chance but something actually useful. I call it "the mourning period".

As I was walking back from lunch with the current object of my affections a few days ago, a car came out of nowhere and got pretty close to hitting us. I commented:

Me: "Man that was close. If it had got you I'd have had to mourn you for like a whole two days."

Indignant, she laughed and pushed me away;

Her: "That's all I get? Jeez!"

Me: "Well we'll see if we can't work on getting it a bit higher" (playful poke, arm around her shoulders and continue walking)

Later that afternoon we'd been having fun exploring our city, and I forget exactly why but the "mourning period" was brought up again. She asked if she was still only worth a couple of days and I replied:

Me: "I dunno, you've done pretty well on our date today, I'll bump it up to four".

Another indignant look, I play it off and we continue our date.

Later still we're fooling around in bed; watching TV and generally having (clothed) fun. I feel things are cooling off a bit and it's getting kinda late, so I whisper in her ear "you're up to a full week now", and she rolls over and continues the fun.

A couple of days later we're sitting on a sofa at a bar getting a drink together and I motion her to kiss me; followed by "ten days". This time she smiles and kisses me again.

She's up to 4 weeks now (we've been dating for about two) and I'll stop using it very shortly before it gets really old, but here's my analysis of the situation:

  • It's created a pretty dark inside joke between us. A mere mention of time to her in public and she will remember the various increments that we've shared.
  • It's not like I'm keeping a scorecard of how she's doing, but she's definitely "interested" in getting a high value.
  • It makes her think of being with me for long enough that I would want to mourn her.
  • It's very easy to turn things light hearted.

Anyway, as I said I've used this with three girls now (over the course of the last year), and it's "worked" in every situation. I'm sure it's partially my personality that helps it work, and I'm sure the girls liked me in the first place, but it's been a really fun way to tease and build attraction.