I by no means call myself a pickup artist nor do I field test any zany or brilliant routines on my own. I browse Seduction occasionally though and last night an interesting event played out.

I work at a bar in a major city in Asia, and last night there was a super cute girl who I talked to a few times while bar tending. She seemed to be into me but was very flirtatious and had a total of 3 guys chasing after her for the entire night.

Now, when it comes to trying to be "alpha" I think a lot of Sedditors confuse this for either A) being a dick or B) being a douchebag, and to be honest, sometimes it is.

This is where context comes up: in this particular instance, there were 2 other good looking, interesting guys hitting on this girl. If you're in a social situation that leads to social hierarchies (like this situation where this girl has multiple guys talking to her, or if you're sitting around a table playing a drinking game with a big group), that's the time when you have to consciously make decisions to be alpha and show that you're dominant. If you're talking to her one on one, or on a date, usually you don't have to scale up being alpha that much - sometimes it comes off as just being rude and makes you less attractive.

So, at one point in the night, said girl has her stuff on a chair at the bar, nearby where one of the other suitors is sitting. I go to sit down and tell her to move her bag, which she does. I sit down and she puts her bag in my lap, expecting me to hold it. Firmly I tell her "I'm not holding your stuff" and dont touch it. She stares at me, grabs her bag off my lap and just drops her shit on the ground and continues staring at me. I stare back slightly amused,

NOW, the other guy sitting nearby jumps out of his chair, grabs the bag, and hands it to her, being a gentlemen. Its nice that he did that, and in other situations I would've done the same if someone dropped their bag, but the SECOND this guy picked up the bag for her the girl immediately dismissed him. She barely even thanked him, kept eye contact with me, and stopped flirting with him for the rest of the night.

Just like that, he was out of the game. Later on through social proof and not being clingy I ended up being the one who left the bar with her (though there was no fclose, which wasn't my goal).

tl;dr, consciously be the dominant male when its necessary. You should already frame yourself as having confidence and high value, so sometimes being TOO alpha at the wrong times can definitely be a bad thing.