After lurking through this subreddit, I have come to a few conclusions I thought I could share with community:

It seems a lot of readers are unsure of themselves and probably ALREADY over-think social situations. By sifting through a lot of posts critically breaking down every interaction between potential mates, I think some people are taking steps backwards.

One of the greatest life lessons I have ever learned is: LIVE IN THE MOMENT. This applies to everything you do, especially in choosing mates and even WAY more important when actually having sex. Be in the room, don't run through Reddit posts while you think about what question to ask next or when to go in for a kiss.

That being said, what you read here can be very helpful. In athletics you learn a new sport by disassembling the steps, practicing them in isolation and then eventually being able to do them without any thought. You don't think "I'll turn left here" on your bike. You simply weave through the pylons without effort.

Do that here, get to know yourself, figure out how you tick, your strengths, your weakness. Then, forget all about it and go be in the moment.

In the world of acting, all the pros you see in Hollywood do something of the same. They study the intellectual hell out of their role. They attack a script and the supporting texts like a bat out of hell. Then, when they stand in front of the camera, a second before they hear "rolling," they throw it all away and forget who they are. A really good actor will often not remember little things they did. After a take the director might run over and say: "I LOVED it when you did ____" But the actor wasn't wholly aware of it, it came out of the moment without conscious thought.

TL;DR: People living in the moment are the most attractive people. Others see them and call it charisma or confidence. Don't run through what Reddit said while you are talking to someone you find appealing.