How do i learn to not care??

brandonmcgritle · 2014-06-09T13:35:51+00:00

Just start talking to more people, then you start to realise it's not hard, then you also start to realise that any single interaction doesn't matter that much, because there are infinitely more people to interact with.

Edenojack · 2014-06-09T15:23:36+00:00

"Who gives a shit" If the answer is not you, or it's you because of how other people perceive you, then don't give any shits. If the answer is you, stick by it. Edit: that's more general for beliefs... In terms of rejection, think about how much will actually change if you get rejected. It's not an awful lot, is it? So therefore, there are no negative outcomes.

Talking with lots of people but not having an agenda in the conversation is a good starting point. Helps you let go of outcomes and makes you focus on the actual conversation.

Endoss · 2014-06-09T16:28:26+00:00

It's really fucking scary at first. Adrenaline pumping when you do your first day game approach. But honestly, it's kind of like jumping off a diving board for the first time. You just have to go for it, and once you're doing it all the fear is gone and it's just pure excitement.

rohder · 2014-06-09T18:38:28+00:00

There's an excellent book out by Susan Jeffers - "Feel the fear and do it anyway".

brandonmcgritle · 2014-06-09T23:39:29+00:00

I would contend that it's human nature to feel fear in circumstances where your survival is at stake. For example, if you're drowning or being chased by a lion. However, most people feel fear in social situations that aren't inherently dangerous, which is not human nature. The very fact that other people exist who don't have this problem is proof that this is not inherent human nature.

Fear in social situations is caused by beliefs. I recommend you check out The Lefkoe Method. I've learned a lot from it.

Basically, you don't want to "program yourself" to not be afraid. Rather, you want to de-program the fears you have accumulated.

Let me give you an example,

say you have a friend named Jerry. Jerry wants to be extroverted and fun and friendly, but he has thoughts like "I wonder if people will think what I say is stupid" or "What if nobody cares about what I have to say?" or "I might end up looking like an idiot" etc.

The reason Jerry would worry about these things would be because of his beliefs. It comes from believing things like, for instance, that if you make a mistake it means you're a stupid person. Or believing that if what you say isn't interesting, you are not a worthwhile person, or believing that the way to be a person worthy of interacting with is to be interesting. Or believing that you suck, or believing that you don't have anything interesting to add to the conversation, or believing that there's osme flaw with you, etc.

There's a million different beliefs one can have that cause nervousness and fear. Everyone is unique.

I have learned The Lefkoe Method, it's quick and easy and I'm astonished with the results. Hit me up for a free demo, I'll talk to you on skype, I'd like to show you what it's like. We'll find a couple of your beliefs and eliminate them. It'll be fun.

sedditforthewin · 2014-06-10T18:37:53+00:00

You have to be emotionally buttfucked enough times.

As far as AA goes, do it consistently (every day) and disassociate the situation from yourself, make it funny, view yourself from above.

Keyblade_Master · 2014-06-11T11:00:20+00:00

I stopped giving a shit because I got sick of it. I would constantly stress over what people thought of me, but then I realized 90% of those who will judge you for being you don't matter. The people who do matter won't judge. For me stopping giving a fuck was a realization, I hope it helps you as well.

SirByron · 2014-06-09T16:39:17+00:00

Once again a PuA commandment has confused cause and effect/by-product for a beginner.

Not caring is an effect of having higher goals over pettiness. It is not the end in itself.

Sex is the byproduct of attraction. It cannot succeed by being an end in itself.

Money is by product of creating value that people want. It usually cannot succeed by being an end in itself.

Fame is the by product of doing something very well. It cannot succeed by being an end in itself.

Downham · 2014-06-09T19:32:27+00:00

/r/howtonotgiveafuck

joshsway · 2014-06-09T14:44:05+00:00

You are always going to care, the trick is to not let caring prevent you from anty-ing up again and playing another hand.

Also, be sure that you do not apply "not caring" to anything but the specific problem of "fear of rejection". I wrote about that in detail here: https://www.joshsway.com/articles/view/you-cant-succeed-if-you-dont-care

Title	How do i learn to not care??
Author	brandonmcgritle
Upvotes	14
Comments	19
Date	June 9, 2014 1:33 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/27p15k/how_do_i_learn_to_not_care/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-learn-to-not-care.1371923 https://theredarchive.com/post/1371923

Comments