(Question) How can I be friendly without being a "nice guy".

cluelessguy12 · 2015-05-06T17:05:36+00:00

So being friendly as you describe it...You want to ensure you still have:

A general love and respect for women.
The upmost respect for her.
The ability to express emotions of infatuation and romance
Emotional empathy
The ability to show vulnerabilities and insecurities and secrets with a girl.

You can do all that... but avoid having "nice guy" syndrome. Because doing all those things doesn't conflict in any way with:

Being shamelessly sexual with her.
Not be a pushover and not put up with any disrespect or bullshit.
Not put her on a pedestal.
Be masculine and tough
Being dominant.

What you want to do is consider that latter set of bullet points. What things there are you lacking in?

Dyablo66 · 2015-05-06T17:41:34+00:00

It's simple. Typical nice guys are nice because they expect people and girls to like them for it. It's not the same if you're nice because you actually want to - people sense it, it gives a totally different vibe. Also even if you like being kind and helping people, don't be a pushover. My general rule is not to do things that they can easily do by themselves. If you genuinely want to help them with a hard task go right ahead, but don't be afraid to say "no" if they want to use you out of their laziness.

Caelira · 2015-05-06T22:53:20+00:00

It's okay to be friendly. Just don't expect anything in return. This is usually the way a 'Nice guy' will think. Be nice, buy things -> fun sexy stuff.

If you're really a friendly person that's fine, don't expect anything in return and be friendly to everyone. Not just the pretty girl you're trying to have sex with.

That being said, if they ask a favour which you don't really want to do, DON'T FUCKING DO IT.

If you're interested in how someone's day was, don't make a half-assed comment. Just be legitimately interested in how their day was.

It's fine being friendly, just don't be a pushover, stay true to yourself in the way that if you don't really feel like doing it, don't do it.

Also, the sexual thing with women you find attractive. That's something that has to do with yourself. The doing the things you think you'll regret not doing. If you're talking with an attractive girl and you think she's absolutely gorgeous, be real with her. Let her know, she can't read your mind. If she says that that's creepy, good for you. You won't be dating a girl that thinks badly of what you feel.

SeattlePUApro · 2015-05-06T17:55:40+00:00

You can be friendly but it has to have some meat behind it.

Take a clique line like "How are you today?" And picture a police officer or a CEO of a major company saying that to you. What's the difference? It's the power and emphasis in how they would say it.

Start adding more emphasis to your words.

redditisawesomeinla · 2015-05-07T02:48:10+00:00

Don't EVER buy a woman's affection. So many guys do this and wonder why they fail.

Also, lots of guys think acting super nice will get the woman to like him - this is being manipulative and a wuss-bag.

pacg · 2015-05-07T07:40:25+00:00

One short answer is never do anything with the expectation of getting something in return.

For example, open a door for a woman, she walks through and doesn't say thank you (kinda rare in my experience but...), doesn't matter because that's what you decided to do. That's how you conduct your life. You didn't do it to get a thank you or undying gratitude. Fuck that. You open the door because you think it's a good and decent thing to do.

Mudane · 2015-05-07T10:41:50+00:00

You can. still be the nice guy. Just don't be obedient to everything a girl says. Know that what a girl says now could be different later. Also don't be afraid to make the first move. To indicate that you want to be more than just friends. Like nice guys are the dudes that actually goes over to her place. This is a hugeeeee advantage in the game. Just make the first move. Their might be shit test along the way. But if you know how to pass them your golden

UKScottAB · 2015-05-07T08:48:16+00:00

Simply put, being a gentleman..

omziraal · 2015-05-06T17:40:12+00:00

Being friendly doesn't mean that you can't be sexual or make witty remarks. Just be nice, but keep the sexual tension. It's not what you say, it's about how you say it.

Title	(Question) How can I be friendly without being a "nice guy".
Author	cluelessguy12
Upvotes	23
Comments	23
Date	May 6, 2015 4:44 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/352qau/question_how_can_i_be_friendly_without_being_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/question-how-can-i-be-friendly-without-being-a.1387779 https://theredarchive.com/post/1387779

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