My gf broke up with me 2 months ago, and despite going out all the time i just think about her constantly and how i'll never find a girl better than her.

CHNchilla · 2015-05-07T15:55:20+00:00

I can promise you that you will get over her, it's just going to take time.

I dated the same girl from senior year of high school, all throughout college. Thought she was the one, true love, ect, ect. Took me a really long time to get over her. I met the chick I'm seeing now close to a year ago and in many ways, she's way cooler and more of a fit than my ex. It's opened my eyes to the idea that we can love many, many people throughout our lives.

Quit putting your ex on a pedestal-- she's an ex for a reason. Get off your ass and meet knew people. If you are genuine in your interactions, it's a near certainty you'll meet someone really cool like I did. But to do that you have to approach and put yourself out there.

"Best way to get over someone is by getting under someone new"

Yeah, it's a trope, but it's entirely true provided you can actually develop a connection with someone. But you don't do that by wallowing in oneitis.

ThrowawayPUA · 2015-05-07T16:16:53+00:00

Read this: Kill Beatrice.

Crazylettuce · 2015-05-07T17:03:52+00:00

Like you my gf broke up with me (3-4 months ago). Hade the same problemed which you are facing right now. What I did to combat this was starting to hit the gym. It made all the negative feelings go away and leave my head in i calm and clear state. Though.. I still had other troubles.. like you I still thought about her and I had this fucked mentality: "Oww I will never have a relationship like this again buuuuhuuuu, no one will be as special." First thing you have to realise is that there are looooooots of chicks out in the world, and if you had it this gr8 with one girl means that there are other girls out there which you can have fun with in similar ways. So go out and get to know more chicks, there are bound to be someone you find interesting. ^{^} One thing you can do is make a list of all the negative things about her, so if you ever think "maan It would be so nice to have her back" => then you look on the note on your computer or w/e and instead you think "ooowww right this bitch wasnt as perfect as I thought"

But I think that the greatest advice, which helped me the most, is to realise that you still have the Hope. The Hope - The hope is when you still believe that in someway you will be able to be with your ex. Right now you might be thinking: "Yea, its over now. But maybe during the summer I could start talking to her and make everything alright again!". NO MAN. What you have to realise and tell yourself is that: "We had lots of fun, but my relationship with (insert Ex name) is over." What I did after I realised that I still had the Hope left in me, was too take a long walk and find a quiet place where I could just process everything and finally accept everything. "It was fun, but my relationship with (insert Ex's name) is over." And it was time to move on. :)

Best of Luck man, it aint easy and it will take time. But if I could fucking do it you can too!

AayushXFX · 2015-05-07T17:00:28+00:00

Even if she's one in a million, there's 3499 more like her...

2015-05-07T18:16:20+00:00

You are no longer in love with her, but an idea of her which is no longer current and does not exist.

ThrowingMyslfOutther · 2015-05-07T23:02:03+00:00

Full on, oneitis.

Here, this may help. A woman that is right for you... will be with you. Just crave and want to be with you. Thus, your ex, was not right for you. That alone should help you reconcile.

Abundance is necessary. Your brain is acting like it doesn't have options. Get on Tinder, get on another dating site and just go out on one date after another.

kavokolak · 2015-05-07T16:50:53+00:00

It's going to take time. I'm recently exiting the same thing you are feeling. You have to start working on yourself, doing things you love. You have to keep your mind busy and focused on anything, so that you don't wander off and start reliving memories with your ex. I know its hard but give it a shot. Ask your friends to hang out with you since you are feeling bad and surely they will understand and want to help. I started therapy and it helped me a lot, giving me motivation and a kick in my ass to change my lifestyle. Most important point is to keep your mind occupied and meet new people, whether it's through hobbies or approaches.

Lordoftheintroverts · 2015-05-07T17:10:33+00:00

So don't, work with a girl you think you can handle and work your way up. I guarantee you'll feel better after you have sex with someone, it doesn't matter who. It's just how attachment works.

discolovesclap · 2015-05-07T19:15:35+00:00

You're not finding anyone better because you're not making yourself any better than you were when you broke up. Make yourself better (exercise, arts, etc) and you'll find someone better. This is a long-game strategy

guywithsybian · 2015-05-07T19:49:00+00:00

I don't think of you at all:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LlOSdRMSG_k

XtremePeace · 2015-05-07T20:00:18+00:00

That's just your ego talking bro. Feeling the loss because you were confortable with the validation. Be confortable with nothing, rather than having yourself and enjoying your own company. Feel the pain and experience the emptiness of it and how it doesn't make sense, and it will fade.

ogge94 · 2015-05-07T17:20:14+00:00

Many times it's only the contact of another person that we miss, but if not, accept that you miss her. Do not try to deny it, hide it or forget it though jumping between bars/clubs. As soon as you accept that you miss this girl you can also accept the fact that you cannot control her decision/will. It ended for a reason and if it was meant to be it would've lasted. Takes two to tango ;) The one is still out there my friend, and I can ensure you that there are loads of "the one" (there are tons of people on this planet). Acceptance and forgiveness then focus on yourself and your priorities!

2Siders · 2015-05-07T21:24:10+00:00

I went through a really rough breakup which happened back in December. Ever since I've been in a self-improvement journey of some sort. The way I feel about it, is you need to transform yourself into a different person. A much better version of yourself. Experience is the catalyst for that.

Keep going out, try new things (I've been doing martial arts), and I promise the pain will ease. It won't even disappear, you'll literally grow stronger so you won't feel it as much, which is awesome.

EDIT: I also read this:

a_little_about_law · 2015-05-07T22:43:55+00:00

This book works: How to Fall Out Of Love

slippy0101 · 2015-05-07T23:01:33+00:00

When you're a good guy in a relationship, you don't look for or really notice many other women so when you break up she really is the best girl you've seen in a long time. Trust me though, there are plenty of girls out there that are better than your girl that would love to be with you. Keep meeting new people and you'll find one.

the_flood · 2015-05-07T23:54:11+00:00

Don't focus on the positives about your ex and over-romanticize things, focus on the negative aspects of her and your relationship. It'll hurt pretty bad for quite some time, but every day things will get a little better, I promise. Give yourself some time, focus on self-improvement, and you'll find another girl will turn up before you know it.

BigHoffDaddy · 2015-05-08T01:20:18+00:00

Near 3 years later and just getting over mine. Just went and looked at her Facebook page to test if I gave a fuck and I didn't. Took almost three years but I am cured. Time heals all wounds, and while it may not take you as long as me, it's going to be a hike. Grab your friends, family, whomever and keep your mind off of her at all times, if you have to purge with a week off from any social media, prevents you from trying to see what she's up to.

TrinityBay · 2015-05-08T02:47:35+00:00

Listen to this

2015-05-08T03:08:42+00:00

My ex and I broke up in january. We dated for a year and one month. I was talking to my dad about it and he said , in his experience, it takes about that same amount of time you dated to get over that ex. I dated a girl three years before that and his advice seemed true. It just takes time man. Take this time to work on yourself, go camping, take a fitness course, find a new hobby, anything to get your mind of her. You'll get through it man, I promise.

2015-05-08T03:32:55+00:00

Trust me, time is all it takes. It was really difficult for me but I got over it quicker than expected, and I'm pretty content again.

Listen to me, you WILL be happy again, you won't feel for her anymore, trust me.

BigGeek43 · 2015-05-08T04:42:42+00:00

I felt the same when my wife decided to divorce me. Even bought an ebook "How to get your ex back". Book suggested investing in yourself. So I joined a ballroom dance class. Holy shit it helped! You forget anything that's bothering you because you have to hear the music and think of the steps and ... be the man and lead your partner. Now I laugh at myself how I thought I will never be happy ever again. My current girl is 100 times better than my ex ever was. She loves me so much, she almost warships me.

Chewydon · 2015-05-08T07:24:42+00:00

Just take time, mourn what you had and when you are done feeding yourself pity remember there's 7ish billion people on the planet and the odds are excellent there's a good number of great women who would love to get to know the you that isn't mourning the loss of something decent in life. And that being upset right now isn't wrong, don't let anyone try to deny you that. Good luck.

5000miles2boston · 2015-05-08T13:43:21+00:00

My comment based on the idea of not finding a girl like her.

"Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else."

George Bernard Shaw

2015-05-08T15:24:26+00:00

Quit being a little bitch mate. Shes dead to you. Move on. Its your choice how it affects you. Dont let it ruin your interactions with other fine ass honeys.

EagerSleeper · 2015-05-25T22:00:13+00:00

I think there is always somebody better for everybody.

I mean seriously, they're are women that will think you are so freaking cool for knowing how to do those things you learned and love to do. When you invite them out to somewhere fun, they jump at the opportunity, and you are happy to be out with somebody so beautiful that cares for you so much.

Just imagine, a girl that is just that much more excited to see you come in the front door after work. To help you unwind and listen to your day while genuinely happy to talk to you.

You don't have to compare her to any pornstar or model because you are so physically and sexually compatible that you don't have any reason to look elsewhere. She's your perfect 10, and that's without including her amazing personality. This is a girl that could listen to you talk about your hobbies for hours, but could switch into amazing sex mode in a moment's notice.

Just think of a girl that could go on and on about her dorky thing she is interested in, but starts blushing when she sees you've just been staring at her smirking because of just how adorable she was acting. A girl who has a life outside of you, but whose fidelity you never have to doubt, despite the number of men that hit on her.

Do you really think that one woman you had a relationship with months ago could beat out the millions of attractive women that could fit into your life more perfectly than you could have ever thought?

News_Bot · 2015-05-07T17:42:17+00:00

There is always someone better, than both you and her. Nobody is perfect. People are compatible with many people. Embrace it and kick that pedestal over.

rustoof · 2015-05-07T18:28:24+00:00

As long as you are still going out and doing the work it doesn't matter how you feel.

Majorxerocom · 2015-05-07T23:38:49+00:00

With that attitude you never will

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