Last night was rough. I did some day game around a touristy area in the city and the mall, then went to some bars and pubs at night. Basically, kept getting rejected.

Girls that were walking, just kept on walking. Girls would ignore me, or even if they managed to listen to me, it would be for a few seconds with an angry face, and none of my jokes were working.

Then one girl approached me and ask if I could take their picture of their friends together. I said, sure but only if you introduce me to them. And she said, "ok" and I took their picture, and she just grabbed her phone, didn't even say thanks, and walked off with her friends. I shouted, "what about the introductions?" and they just kept walking totally ignoring me.

I kept doing more approaches, but I felt worse after each one, and at the end of the night I felt like worthless shit.

I also felt really bitter and angry. I felt like women are so manipulative, and disrespectful, and unkind. I really have no qualms with girls who don't like certain guys, or don't want to have sex with me, or whatever, that's totally fine. But why have such a huge ego about it? Why do they have to prance around like they are the best thing in the world? Why can't they be humble about themselves? The girls in the bars just act like every man who approaches them is a piece of shit, and in a lot of ways it seems that they are, because that is the game.

The one who wants something from the other is the loser in the game.

And so, if I want women, I've already lost. It's a shitty game.

So I need to be outcome independent, I need to convey value, I need to have a screening frame, I need to fake it till I make it, I need to act like I get laid all the time, so girls see me as a guy who is attractive. I have to have a buyer frame, and be selective. But I felt all these "mindsets" slowly breaking down from the "reality" of what was happening around me in these rough experiences and endless stream of rejections.

I'm trying to trick my mind into believing these things and keeping a "solid frame" but the frame keeps falling apart. Reality keeps settling back in, because in the end, I am still the one approaching. It's not the girls approaching me. I could be "screening" by asking some questions, but if the girl just says, "fuck off - get out of my face" then I'm pretty much screwed. There is no way I can get her. And if every girl rejects me from now to the end of time, I don't see how my "screening" made any sense at all, because they've already all screened me out.

And people say I should focus on having fun and not chasing, but then they say I should focus on approaching which feels exactly like chasing. I'm literally running after girls across the street, running around with their shopping bags, through crowded bars, all chasing. And it feels nothing like I am actually screening.

I feel like I have value as a man. But how I feel means nothing, if the girls don't feel that value as well. And even if it's a broken "validation frame" because I'm supposed to not need validation from women to feel good, then I don't know how to make that work together with "you have to approach a lot of women" - because immediately, if I am approaching, then I want something. If I wanted NOTHING, then I wouldn't approach.

If wanting to talk to girls is needy, then should my opening line be, "Hey I saw you from over there and I really did not want to talk to you, but my friend forced me to do it. I really don't want anything to do with you. But hello."

That just feels so retarded. I don't even think I can pull that off in a humorous way because it makes absolutely no sense. If I don't need women to be happy, if I'm truly happy with myself, then I should quit game. And I could go down that road, but I've been down that road, and eventually no matter how many cool things I have going in my life, there is this vacuum left in my life when it lacks any feminine energy. I get lonely eventually. And thus, I've lost again.

I just feel lost and sad. I will approach some more tomorrow, but I feel like after the end of 1000 approaches, I will be a pure puddle of shit with no happiness torn to shreds. This game is rough. Not complaining. Reality is reality. But it's rough on my emotions, and it's making me feel horrible.

I'm not looking for pity or sympathy. I just wanted to vent about my night, and could use a couple words of encouragement or something so I can fix this problem I have.