How to deal with "girls night out" when in a LTR?

deptii · 2014-06-23T20:48:10+00:00

There's been a lot of good threads on this in the TRP realm, here's a few:

http://www.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/282rvn/flip_the_club_script_for_a_moment/

http://www.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/21272g/question_on_behavior/

It all comes down to how often she goes, how late she stays out, and where she's going to. If she's going to a club like how you mentioned, at worst she's looking to cheat, at best she's there to soak up male validation. Neither are an ideal quality for a woman in a LTR. Ask her why they don't go see a movie or just hang out at either's house? It would be cheaper to drink, and safer instead of possibly driving drunk. Point is, they're going out to the bars and clubs alone to feel single again. Otherwise, why not take you along?

All that said, don't stop her from going. You should imply, either directly or indirectly, that it's not the sort of behavior you're attracted to in a LTR partner. If she goes anyway, create some distance, ignore her for bit, possibly even think about demoting her to plate. Remember, you're free to have expectations and standards of her behavior. If she doesn't meet them, then you move on.

DirtyD27 · 2014-06-23T20:02:25+00:00

Pay no attention to her and take it as an opportunity for dudes night out

trp_que · 2014-06-23T21:04:01+00:00

My philosophy for LTRs and situations like these is simply: "if she is going to cheat, she is going to cheat". If she is devoted to you she won't fuck around on you. Sheltering her from opportunities to cheat all the time is

Only going to delay the inevitable (if she has it in her to cheat)

and

Make you look insecure

Just think of it as free time to do your own shit with your friends. Take it as a positive.

TogiBear · 2014-06-23T20:46:48+00:00

I'm certainly not okay with a LTR going to a bar/club, even if it's every three months or so. She's in an exclusive relationship, she has no business there. With all of the alcohol and male attention, it's awful easy for her to "make a mistake."

You need to set boundaries. Let her know that you trust her, but you don't trust alcohol and you're not okay with your girlfriend being surrounded by and dancing with horny drunk guys.

It's a shit test. She's testing you to see what she can get away with and/or getting a good look at what's out there with a side of getting external validation from other guys. If she cares about you, and your relationship she will respect your boundaries. She probably won't like hearing this, but it makes you uncomfortable so tell her, keep calm and hold frame.

If you come across an opportunity, check to see if her married friend still has her ring on when she's at the club.

captainbloodd · 2014-06-23T19:59:19+00:00

Hey man, let her go and don't say anything about it. You can't control whether or not she's going to cheat on you at this club, so don't worry about it.

If she does decide to do something stupid, you dump her and let her know that she's lost the best thing that ever happened to her.

Title	How to deal with "girls night out" when in a LTR?
Author	beginner_
Upvotes	12
Comments	19
Date	June 23, 2014 7:24 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/28wchv/how_to_deal_with_girls_night_out_when_in_a_ltr/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-to-deal-with-girls-night-out-when-in-a-ltr.140415 https://theredarchive.com/post/140415

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