Want to get better with women, not become a PUA

iskander_the_great · 2016-10-05T13:18:50+00:00

I'll just quote Bruce Lee here: "Absorb what is useful, discard what is useless and add what is specifically your own"

PUA techniques are not the panacea, but they very useful when you are starting and you don't have idea on how to start, as you get more experience you will develop your own style that works because you already tried different things.

For example open - attract - qualify - close is the basic on how to seduce a woman, how you implement that it's your call you can have your own way and stories to open and attract, and also you qualification it's about your taste, but keeping in mind those steps it's very useful.

If you feel rusty try to remember what you did when you where starting try to go back to that and add what you learn in those 3 years.

TheXXL · 2016-10-05T11:46:34+00:00

This question is hard to answer, since the things we discuss here are mostly necessary to seduce women. This does not mean that you have to become one of those "I have to fuck every bitch I come across" type of guys, but the same principles apply to seduction like they apply to pua. To know what you are looking for, we need to know what points are the ones that you don't relate to.

taylortob · 2016-10-05T13:42:28+00:00

I would start with a book called Mark Manson.

A good form of seduction that I've noticed works well is vulnerability which Mark Manson explains thoroughly in the book. That means expressing how you feel in a confident manner, setting boundaries, and making yourself available for rejection.

Example: You're on a third date with this girl you've been seeing and you're walking her back to her house. It's late, and you're standing around making boring conversation about how the Dollar General across the street was robbed. You've never kissed her yet, but you're scared to do it. But you tell her this, "I'm procrastinating on kissing you right now." She's a bit nervous but reacts well. You take her for a quick ride in your car and when you arrive back, you still haven't kissed her and you're still nervous. This is fine and you tell her this, "I really want to kiss you right now, but you're so intimidating!" Finally, she comes in to kiss you. That's expressing vulnerability and making yourself available for rejection.

Jacob_961 · 2016-10-05T14:21:17+00:00

PUA focuses of getting sex as fast as possible so it focuses on the "game" side of it much more. Hopefully with time and effort you can get enough skills to quickly emotionally charge and lay higher and higher calibre girls until you meet the one you really click with and keep her. Biological drives and overall how much fun she has with you will determine your level of success.
Alternatively you can focus on your career and focus on having "objective value that holds", and slow play based on merit, dress well, have and exhibit potential, be a gentleman and communicate observable value until gradually a strong emotional connection is established and use game as a spice so that you continue to make the girl feel like a girl and don't do stupid shit like bragging and expecting the girl to love you because you make more money than her and drive a sports car. Nothing wrong with the "I'm CEO bitch" frame as long as it's part of your identity, it's who you are not what you do to get women. You would go for women who you really would want relationships with and hope you don't do stupid shit.

List of stupid shit include:

Bragging unless it is part of who you are and what you are passionate about.
Putting the girl on a pedistal and trying to "win" her. Girls want to be chosen, not worked hard towards until she settles because she doesn't have a better option.
Criticising the girl for anything. Never criticise women. Ever. She wants to feel safe around you and shielded from negatives, not receive negativity and be told she's not good enough. If she's not good enough, you shouldn't be with her, period. This doesn't mean she can do anything she wants. It only means she's allowed to be emotional and lack rationality because you are the supply of groundedness. Your job is to be the leader. Her job is to be yours and give you children and be feminine.
Don't work hard to please and look for a reaction because it communicates that you are lower than the girl and are working to "buy her". If you ever think to yourself "I took her to a nice restaurant and she didn't even sleep with me", that is exactly why she didn't sleep with you. You take her to a nice restaurant for the experience, not to impress her.
Career aspiration, masters degrees and climbing the social ladder can make you look boring unless you make it part of your identity and passion in life. You should personally get off from making money, working towards promotions, etc... it shouldn't be something you do because you have nothing better to do or are boring. You have to take pride in what you do so that she does too.
Placing too much importance on the girl, needing validation and having an agenda.

You will always need game but having the identity of a "man on his path and purpose" will get you a girlfriend faster than the "chill guy" frame. "Badboy" frame gets short terms results with enough practice. It depends what you want and how much effort you want to put in mastering the emotional element of seduction.

Woujo · 2016-10-05T16:53:05+00:00

there's not much difference.

but also theres my blog www.woujo.com

2016-10-07T03:05:19+00:00

Watch the movie "The Hottie and the Nottie" and pay attention to the Johann Wulrich character, how he acts.

Title	Want to get better with women, not become a PUA
Author	happygocrazee
Upvotes	1
Comments	12
Date	October 5, 2016 11:41 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/55z19l/want_to_get_better_with_women_not_become_a_pua/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/want-to-get-better-with-women-not-become-a-pua.1413463 https://theredarchive.com/post/1413463

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