[FR] Shy/Non-talkative Girl At Mall- HOW DO I TALK TO THEM?

suxess6 · 2016-12-13T17:12:34+00:00

I'd just say that You can't get blood out of a stone. Either she wasn't interested in you and thus lied about having a boyfriend, or she actually did have a boyfriend.

Also, she didn't seem that shy/non-talkative! (volunteered her name straight away for example) I'm assuming you're from the US? Come to the UK, and you'll see what REALLY 'hard to talk too' girls are like! (talking to strangers just isn't done here, and so some of the girls are COMPLETELY freaked out by a stranger talking to them and will just scramble to get away or at best you'd be lucky to get a one-word-replies, lol)

failatsomething · 2016-12-13T23:35:59+00:00

This girl is actually pretty typical of a pretty girl. I would not label her as shy. She's just shy for you :)

Issue was you didn't build attraction. You need to carry the weight of the conversation in the beginning until she's attracted. Be ready with interesting stories or routines to go through during the beginning of the interaction. I'll point this out in the breakdown.

So I was at the mall chilling with my friend. Our agenda didn't exactly involve going around getting girls, but when we saw this one girl sitting at this counter, I decided to approach. The girl was on her phone- this is important.

Good man. Props for approaching.

Note- I'm usually really good at talking to more extroverted, talkative girls, as I'm sure a lot of people are. You know, no awkward pauses, you get to make more jokes, conversation flows so well, etc. This was honestly one of my first times talking to a shy/non-talkative girl.

All but like, four girls like to talk. Why should she talk to you? Cuz you sat down on her break? Cuz you're Indian? Be attractive. You started down the right path, but stopped short. That's what drew this interaction to a halt.

Me: Hi, I just thought you were cute and had to meet you (I take a seat next to her). Her: Oh, thank you! My name's Shy Girl (shakes my hand)!

Solid.

Me: I'm IndianWise, nice to meet you. So what are you doing around here, besides drinking coffee? Her: (laughs) Oh haha I'm just on my break.

Nothing wrong with this, but you could have gone more playful. "What you doing here, besides waiting on handsome boys to come over and say hi ;)"

Me: What's good here? Her: Oh no ahaha I work at another place at the end of the mall, I'm just here.

This is where it really fizzled. You're expecting her to carry the weight of the conversation when you've done nothing to deserve to expect it. You can't start a conversation with interview questions.

"What's good here?" isn't bad if you followed it up with "the other day I had the craziest thing happen to me when I ordered my sandwich..." or something. Point is, be ready to talk a lot more than her in the beginning of the interaction. You need to provide stories and entertainment to get her on board and get her invested. Same goes for the next portion of the FR. You ask her what school she goes to. Don't rely on her to entertain. Entertain yourself and everyone around you.

Me: I'm thinking Georgetown. Her: Oh no ahahaha I'm not like that.

This is another opportunity for you that you let drop. Her "I'm not like that." IndianWise "Good. Georgetown girls blah blah." or "Sucks to be you. Georgetown is great blah blah."

Up to you but have fun with it and don't get into this interview-style conversation.

At this point in the interaction, she kind of goes back on her phone. There's a bit of a silence, so I try to bring something up. The conversation pretty much goes in this loop- I try to bring something up, she'll look up from her phone, say a few words, and then go back to it. I knew my body language and stuff isn't an issue because girls have actually complimented me on my confidence, so I had no idea what was going wrong. Eventually, I decided to eject.

You lost the set at this point. You had a couple opportunities to generate attraction but didn't. You are "just another boring dude" to her. The rest of the interaction isn't going to go anywhere because of this.

So when my friend and I broke down the interaction, we kind of decided on two things- 1) that I should have told her something like "tell whoever you're talking to that you just met the most awesome Indian ever" and then told her to talk to me and get off her phone

This could be fun if it was done in the beginning of the interaction. It would not work as a hail mary to save your set. The issues with the interaction were in the conversation that went nowhere.

2) said something like "Wow, you really don't like talking much, do you?" in order to get her to start opening up.

Nope. She doesn't like opening up to you. Yet ;)

Thoughts? Advice? Please let me know!

Play off things she says.
Expect to do the large majority of the talking early in the interaction.
You're not going to close without building attraction.
Keep at it. You had a strong opener and I like that you stayed in set despite her pressures.

IndianWise · 2016-12-13T17:47:46+00:00

You failed all her shit tests and spent way too long there.

Most likely didn't have a bf and found you boring.

Be in a hurry. This was something that took me a while to learn. I would stay and try to talk. Bad idea. She's assumes I am into her, the conversation leads nowhere, and it ends up being a shit interaction. You can have the best body language and confidence in the world but, if you place too much value on her, you already lost.

I usually approach at the grocery store. Most women are bored and annoyed that they have to go shopping again. I introduce myself, make about 15 seconds of small talk and as soon as she goes unresponsive I pull away.

When she goes silent don't stay chained to her. A golden response would be, "Well, I need to finish my food. What's your number." If she hits ya with the boyfriend line mention how you have one too and point to your friend. This will destroy her excuse and keep it funny.

Say that as soon as it dies.

Most of the time I'll just leave and they say the panicked, "Wait!" and after that the deal is done.

Your approaches should be 30 - 45 seconds max.

Try it and message me how it went.

Title	[FR] Shy/Non-talkative Girl At Mall- HOW DO I TALK TO THEM?
Author	IndianWise
Upvotes	1
Comments	11
Date	December 13, 2016 5:07 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/5i4qmf/fr_shynontalkative_girl_at_mall_how_do_i_talk_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/fr-shynon-talkative-girl-at-mall-how-do-i-talk-to.1417030 https://theredarchive.com/post/1417030

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