Signs Attention and Validation

Steve_Savage · 2017-12-20T20:21:14+00:00

If they try to get you to buy stuff for them or they use you for social events (got 2 tickets to something, but won't even hold your hand)

Conor_Niggregor · 2017-12-20T17:58:59+00:00

what did she say when you asked her out? if you want a real answer, you gotta give details, man

ethical_pa · 2017-12-20T19:00:37+00:00

If I were a good PUA, I would say that you have to recognize that all women are validated by attention. The trick is to first use the initial attention seeking behavior she is wanting from you and create a dependency on her part. By withholding it at the right time, then giving just enough at the right time. Once you have created this dependancy, and she is completely hooked, you switch it to a system where she only gets your attention and therefore validation, in a sexual manner.

That is, you are only giving her attention and validation when you are having, or about to have sex with her.

Easy... In theory.

bubba2match · 2017-12-20T19:55:47+00:00

Giving someone attention and validation isn't a bad thing in and of itself . It's only bad when you have goals that are different than hers (I.e. You want her and she doesn't want you). It sounds to me as though you didn't take her maybe as a true no, since you're still thinking about it. This is a problem because you're lying to yourself and also, to a lesser extent, to her and to us. Being forthright with your intent is a much better, albeit harder, route.

What you've actually done here in her eyes is given her the opportunity to think about you in that light and to decide whether she wants you as a romantic partner or not . You have not given her the opportunity to readdress the situation, though. You can remedy that. Confront her with your intent, calling back the original conversation, and call her out on any bullshit. Get a hard yes or a definite no, and thank her for her frankness.

dinercheeseburger · 2017-12-22T17:46:22+00:00

Sounds like you are a teenager or a younger male. But, when a girl is interested in you, she will make time for you. Unless she is overseas or is in jail, she has no reason not to see you.

Also, when you asked her out, What did you say? Did you say, let's have drinks or go to this place on Sat at 8pm? Or did you say, would you like to hang out with me sometimes? Obviously you need to make a definite date. If she says no, maybe or we'll see. It's a no and just move on.

Title	Signs Attention and Validation
Author	Gazela1997
Upvotes	7
Comments	6
Date	December 20, 2017 5:43 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/7l2z83/signs_attention_and_validation/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/signs-attention-and-validation.1438781 https://theredarchive.com/post/1438781

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