Does being persistent ever work?

Bodegaz · 2019-09-20T10:17:25+00:00

[permanently deleted]

pnadlerlaw · 2019-09-20T14:11:24+00:00

When the girl doesn’t like you? No.

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=GZ3QHTpMZgQ

There’s, “NO! STOP IT!” and then there’s, “No,” lol, “stop it,” lol, “you’re being so bad,” lol, “stop it.”

But that’s not really an issue of persistence.

For example, when I met my wife, I was already seeing someone, but was genuinely in the process of breaking up with her. I had started that process before I even met my wife for the first time.

So, when I met my wife, I was honest with her and told her I had a girlfriend but, I was already in the process of breaking up with her.

My wife told me, “Well, I don’t do that. I don’t date guys who are dating someone else.”

This wasn’t an issue or question about persistence. This was an issue of intelligence and communication - being able to recognize that this wasn’t her telling me no!

So I kept talking to my wife and we kept hanging out. I asked her out for Valentine’s Day, and she said, “No, you have a girlfriend!”

Again, she said “No,” she used those words. But we both understood it didn’t really mean, “No, I’m not interested in you and don’t like you.” It meant, “I don’t feel comfortable under the circumstances of you still technically having a girlfriend.”

So, the third time, I called her to tell her that I broke up with my girlfriend. And she agreed for us to finally go out one-on-one.

My wife loves sharing that story, because it makes her feel all sorts of good. Chased after, pursued, wanted, maybe he broke up with his gf just so he could be with me, I said no and he still persisted. So there’s that aspect as well, the narrative/story she’s going to have for herself afterwards.

But to be clear, it’s not my being persistent that transformed someone who wasn’t interested in me to magically becoming interested in me. “Persistence” is the reframe she tells herself and others to feel good about herself. What is really happening is that you “recognize and understand” that she’s not really saying NO, despite it on the surface sounding and appearing like a clear as day no.

Another story:

A friend of mine was engaged. He met this other woman. He cancelled the wedding and broke off the engagement to be with this other girl.

Same thing, he was telling this other girl, “Listen, things are legitimately not working out. I don’t want to go through with the wedding.” This other girl was like, “That’s up to you. I don’t want any part of that. But I can’t be with someone who is literally about to get married.” So, he called off the wedding and cancelled the engagement. And afterwards, him and this girl started dating, and now they’re married.

Another story:

My ex with borderline personality disorder. First day we met, at a bar, we went back to her place. She invited me into her place. She was showing me around like a 1,200sq.ft. space, and then we ended up on her bedroom and on her bed. First thing she says it, “I don’t want you to think we’re going to do anything tonight. I’m not like that.” I mean, that’s when I roll my eyes (in my head). It’s like, “Don’t cite the scripture to me, witch, I was there when this song and dance was first written.”

We start making out, I start groping her, I start rubbing her over her clothes, I grab her and put her under me and get on top of her on the bed, and she’s the one who starts unbuttoning my pants without me saying a single word.

Again, that wasn’t persistence, that was recognition that her no ... stop it lol ... you’re being so bad .. I’m not like that didn’t really mean NO!!!

CaesarJulius420 · 2019-09-20T10:55:28+00:00

To be honest, My grandmother says the same about my grandad. How he was persistent on asking her out and after several NO's he got one yes and then they got married. She makes it very clear she settled for my grandad (bless him) but NO sir times have changed and women know what they want and if she has said NO, its because she means no. Persistance now is just annoying.

Themajestictaco · 2019-09-20T09:17:32+00:00

Don't be a creep and accept a womans, or anyone for that matter, answer

smoothmax · 2019-09-20T17:04:50+00:00

Guys generally break down into:

Bad boy: fun, unpredictable (appeals to psychotic women)

Nice guy: obsequious servant (appeals to neurotic women)

Leader: gung ho social organizer or company president (appeals to extroverted women)

Provider: boring, just a paycheck (appeals to nobody except as their second choice)

Being persistent never works, except for providers. Eventually, many women give up and settle down with a provider because they are sick of dating unreliable bad boys, needy nice guys, or hyperactive leaders.

Providers role in life is to pay the woman and her children's bills and to have really boring sex while she fantasizes about her favorite type of guy. That would be, in broad terms, a rock star, a guy who brings her coffee, and her boss.

Title	Does being persistent ever work?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	6
Comments	20
Date	September 20, 2019 9:13 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/d6s9ip/does_being_persistent_ever_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/does-being-persistent-ever-work.1479105 https://theredarchive.com/post/1479105

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