Common Problem I Can’t Figure Out

grrinchas · 2019-11-24T03:21:58+00:00

6-7 years of pick up and still don’t know how to keep women? You must be slow learner.

Anyway. To put it simple.

If you wish to keep women you like/love besides you. She must feel like she doesn’t have you. The moment she realises that she “has” you, the moment you loose her.

To do that, you have to be prepared to walk away from her anytime no matter how much you like her or love her. Doesn’t meant that you have to sleep with other women. Just remind her from time to time that you won’t put up with her shit and you have options.

And the reason this works because this is the only way to make her feel special. If you can have any women, yet you choose to stay with her, this makes her feel very special.

PiperBigBell · 2019-11-24T03:16:39+00:00

Show more sexual intent. Flirt more. Escalate more. Keep the interaction man to woman. They need to see you as a sexually attractive, viable man first, and the fun conversationalist second.
Show women the full range of your personally. Be polarizing and get them emotionally invested.

carnesaur · 2019-11-24T04:04:36+00:00

I feel like if your value is in place you'd get the woman you desire. So if the ones you want are getting away check yourself. Is something missing? Good job? Physical appearance? Personality? Make them laugh? Make them interested? Make them feel safe/secure? For each of those that fall short, it's a proverbial hole in the fishing net and theres a chance they're gonna slip through.

Sometimes they're insignificant ( and small) and will slip through regardless. These are usually hoes, golddiggers, or idiots.

billgrimes5 · 2019-11-24T04:12:18+00:00

The way you act and talk with the girls you really want vs the ones you don’t really want but want you, needs to be flipped.

There was some truth to grrinchas post as well.

Additionally, If they don’t feel a connection and don’t want to date you the answer is simple, you are not high status enough.

If a woman wants to be more sexually interesting to men, she would work on looking more sexy and attractive. If a man wants to be more sexually interesting he would need to work on increasing his status.

Develop your status. Become a high status male. There are several ways to do this. One is, develop your leadership. Read leadership books, extreme ownership by jocko willink. Put yourself in situations where you lead and are challenged to grow as a supervisor or sharpen your leadership.

If you have success with one night stands but lasting relationships is lacking I would think about how you go about stimulating emotions in a relationship. Some guys think they have to work to please the woman constantly and can’t have the girl ever displeased with them. This gives the girl the status and is not productive. For a sustainable relationship, dynamics should be set up where you lead and are in charge and she works on pleasing you and feels compelled to make you happy, and that gives her happiness.

drdavidbanner20 · 2019-11-24T04:55:19+00:00

I’ve had plenty of successes bringing girls back from bars and on first dates but really simply, I can’t get a quality girl to want to date me.

You might be treating these "quality women" differently than you would treat a woman from the bar. Maybe you're very confident with these bar hookup women, but then you play it safe with the higher quality women.

Depending on your goals with this side of your life, you may want to focus ONLY on these higher quality women so that you become accustomed to chatting/flirting/dating them.

legitimately probably been on 100+ first dates and only maybe 10-20 of those led to a second date.

Those aren't great stats for 6-7 years into this. A few questions:

What is your first date process?
Are you talking too much?
Are you coming off as too much of a player? Are you coming off too nice?
Are you (appropriately) touching women?
Are you connecting with women on deeper/more personal things?

ChrisDarmount · 2019-11-24T07:54:32+00:00

If you’re going out with really hot girls, your date to close ratio isn’t that bad.

It also depends on where you meet them.

I have sort of the opposite problem. It’s more difficult for me to get on the date with a hot woman. But if they decide To sleep with me, they almost always end up wanting a relationship.

I’ve reflected on this, and I have a few theories as to why this is. One is I think when a hot woman does agree to go out with me, she is especially interested. This is because my game isn’t that good, so she’s identified something about my true nature that she likes. I think a lot of people who have really good game sort of end up swamped with success with women, but since their game is so good they end up spending time with a lot of women who they’re not fundamentally compatible with.

My last girlfriend was really hot, and on our first date I did nothing special. I just showed up and asked her a bunch of questions about her self. To be honest I was pretty bored. And I think she was stressed because she doesn’t like dating. But I met her on tinder, and she’s really hot so obviously she probably had close to 10,000 matches. For some reason she pick me, even though I’m not remotely close to the hottest guy on tinder. Or the hottest guy she matched with. Turns out our chemistry was Out of this world. Being around her was like being on heroin. The sex was literally mind blowing, like I passed out mind blowing. It was worth getting rejected by a bunch of other hot women who I wouldn’t have been as compatible with to find her.

Another thing I should mention is that I have nice guy game. I do a lot of shit that they say not to do on these boards. And I will say that when pursuing hot woman at first, a lot of that shit doesn’t work and turns women off. Like being a nice person and complementing them. BUT After you fucked a woman, the script can be totally flipped. You can call a woman beautiful and do all kinds of things to make her feel good and she won’t get turned off. Instead she’ll want to get serious with you. For example, I’ll order women $15 earrings off Amazon and just surprise them with them every few dates. Or buy them flowers and put them in a vase. I sporadically tell them how beautiful I think they are. I should mention this all comes from a confident, giving place. I have very high empathy naturally, so I derive direct pleasure from making her feel good. I don’t do it because I want her to like me.

The caveat is you can’t be needy. You can never be needy. Like literally never. Like even if you’ve got three kids with her.

...Just to give you some context, Because I’m saying some stuff that’s counter to some of the fundamental teachings on this board. I have fucked over 100 women. And I’m juggling three right now who I’m currently sleeping with, and have dates lined up with a few more.

Title	Common Problem I Can’t Figure Out
Author	Rudolph45
Upvotes	3
Comments	11
Date	November 24, 2019 3:10 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/e0suze/common_problem_i_cant_figure_out/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/common-problem-i-cant-figure-out.1484530 https://theredarchive.com/post/1484530

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