The biggest mistake I kept managing to make was not building rapport over texting. You will see from seddit and other game experts that the main goal of texting is to get a date, and they are right.

However, when I was learning I took that as "only use texting to set up a date." That means my text conversations tended to go as follows:

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"Hey Sarah it was great meeting you last night"

"You too! I had a lot of fun"

"We should grab a drink Tuesday at 7 at Bar X"

SILENCE

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I made 2 major mistakes with this:

  1. I didn't build any rapport or comfort. I went from first to fifth gear, and it was way too much commitment for the girl who I talked to for 5-10 minutes at the bar. She didn't know enough about me yet and we hadn't build any tension or want over text. Sure I talked to her at the bar, but that was last night and she probably got hit on by other guys. Girls will often forget that passion or just not be in the mood the next day. So you have to build conversation, start flirting, and then slowly ask for the date.

Todd V. says there are 4 "stages" of texting: Silence, Shit Testing, Platonic/Logical, Positive/Flirty. (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9P-wr8JdVyo)

I was trying to ignore all of this and just go for the date. Big Mistake.

2) I overwhelmed the girl with date, time, and place. That is a lot and seems very demanding. We still need to lead the interaction, but it should be slower, something like:

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"Are you a fan of beer?"

"Yea, I love Blonde Ales!"

"There is this place Bar X that has a great one"

"No way? I'll have to try it"

"Let's go Thursday or Friday night"

"I could do Thursday!"

"Great! Sounds like a plan"

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You can set the time then or wait. I don't think that part is super important either way.

I am still learning, so this may not be perfect, but I wish I knew what I do now a couple years back.