The ultimate third-party shit-test?

ferengiprophet · 2015-07-04T12:32:19+00:00

"We're just taking it one step at a time"

nyrp · 2015-07-04T12:25:06+00:00

Well. What's your plan? To you want to get married? Are you waiting to see? Are you 100% opposed? What's your stance?

kempff · 2015-07-04T19:56:49+00:00

I agree with /u/LukeMooney, keep it funny because they are not actually asking why you aren't getting married. But if the question is posed to you seriously, here are a few ideas:

"Marriage is just a piece of paper."
"I'm getting all the benefits of marriage without the responsibilities just the way things are. Plus I can walk away at any time. Pretty sweet deal, don't you think?" (Make sure LTR hears you.)
"I'm waiting for true marriage equality."
"I'm far too rich to risk it."

I don't recommend responding to their inevitable requests for clarification or their counter-objections. (Never argue with a woman.) But if you're in the mood to bicker for fun, you may find these lines of argument entertaining:

"Marriage is just a piece of paper." "Oh but it's much more than that!" "Like what?" "Love!" "I already love her." "Children!" "I don't want children." "Commitment!" "Oh, you mean like our divorced friends?" "But they were committed during the marriage!" "I'm already there - I just skipped the wedding, and skipped the divorce." "That's differennnt!"

...and so on ad nauseam. This eventually turns into the second response above. In any case I guarantee she will be unable to articulate in what way marriage is more than a piece of paper. I suggest terminating the bickering with a non-sequitur such as "You know, you're cute."

Notice by the way these responses are all I, not we. It's important that you psychologically distance yourself from her to maintain your own emotional independence and decision-making with regard to the future of your relationship. Plus it's a good thing for other women to see you that way.

"I'm waiting for true marriage equality." "What do you mean?" "I want to be able to bring nothing to the table but my dick and fading good looks, have someone throw me a fabulous party where I am the center of attention, contribute nothing to the relationship but my DNA for ten years, withhold sex as a weapon, spend her money, cheat on her and lie about it, trick my wife into raising another woman's children, and walk away with all the kids and half of everything she has on this earth including her mental tranquility." "You're awfully cynical." "Yes. Yes I am." "But some marriages work out just fine." "You mean like yours?" "That's differennnt."

secret_barber · 2015-07-04T13:40:51+00:00

I would recommend no one ever get married. But, what do you want?

VasiliyZaitzev · 2015-07-04T14:02:06+00:00

"why aren't you married yet?"

Because it's not 1850.

"you know, if you're not sure yet you can just propose and figure out the details later" or the "lowkey":

"So, on the biggest decision that either of us will ever make, your advice is just sort of 'wing it', get engaged before we're ready and then break it off if we change our minds. That seems like an odd view about marriage."

"when is the wedding?"

"When we're ready and not before."

If they persist:

"Look, we're on our own timeline, and not someone else's, end of discussion."

LukeMooney · 2015-07-04T14:21:19+00:00

Keep it funny. It's a shit test so do not take it seriously. My response would be huge smile and playful touching with "when I do propose,YOU will be the first to know!!!!" Hahahaha.

If you engage in logic, you will lose. It must be kept all funny and jokey.

RidleySmith · 2015-07-04T13:41:55+00:00

"When hell freezes over", should about put the brakes on them asking again.

NidStyles · 2015-07-04T20:04:06+00:00

$10 says she's asking some of them to drop hints.

Title	The ultimate third-party shit-test?
Author	Mansmansman
Upvotes	6
Comments	23
Date	July 4, 2015 11:26 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3c3f44/the_ultimate_thirdparty_shittest/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/the-ultimate-third-party-shit-test.150773 https://theredarchive.com/post/150773

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