I'm back in the game after a number of years out of it. I'm a pretty social extroverted person and I go out a lot so I seem to have no trouble meeting women. I approach, I talk to whomever, not only women, and normally I get good vibes in return. Practically every woman that I ask for her number gives it to me without hesitation and they all seem down to hang out again. Usually I text them a day or two after meeting with a cute reminder who I am, and I either ask a follow up question about something referencing how we met, or I ask them out. Pretty standard.

However, herein lies the rub.

First off, practically no woman texts back quickly it seems, they all wait hours or days to reply, which makes anything spontaneous impossible and planning a chore. Honestly at this point I feel like I would be weirded out if one texted back quickly, that's how inundated I am with this bullshit. What I want is to have a real time conversation via text like I do in person, and I know they do this with their friends, so what the fuck. I absolutely refuse to play these phone games so I text back whenever I see it, usually very quickly. One might argue that this makes you look pathetic but the way I figure it, she was just on her phone and just talking to me, so at least I'm on her mind at that very moment. Strike while it's hot more or less.

Then there are of course the girls that text back once and then never again. No idea why she gave me her number. With these girls I try twice and then delete the number. Honestly I should just delete it after one try because if I don't get a favorable response from the start, I never will.

I'm also convinced I fucked it up with a couple of girls that I had good dates with due to texting. One girl I had a good date with didn't reply for days afterward so I sent a jokey text insinuating that she ghosted me and she replied immediately, denying it. We joked about it but then a few days later when I asked her out again, nothing. Two other girls I made out with just straight up didn't reply the next day.

What frustrates me is this feeling I have that if all interactions were in person, I would be killing it, but this in between limbo texting bullshit puts all the power in their hands and makes the chaser (i.e. me) seem like a sap. The thing is I have no proof of this, I can't be sure this is what it is. My analytical side is going nuts because these are all situations with practically no real feedback that I learn from for next time.

I'm starting to think that maybe it would be better to get IGs rather than numbers so then I can at least show off my life and maybe get a vague sense of their interest based on if they look at my stories or not. Probably meaningless, I know. Maybe I should call instead of text? Maybe I should just not text at all after the initial message? Go super aloof?

I don't even bother with apps/OLD because of my utter distaste for this shit, I'm all about in person interactions but getting the second or third one after the initial meeting / first date is like pulling teeth. Am I doing something wrong?