I want to approach, but I don't want to boost her ego

seduction-ModTeam · 2024-05-29T06:05:40+00:00

This post had to be taken down because it appears to be focused on a specific situation or person. While Field Reports deal with specific situations and people, remember that the focus is different:

A field report explains a lesson learned or demonstrates a Seduction concept.
If the point of this post is asking how to get that specific girl, it is out of bounds except in a Basic Questions Thread.

No worries though! Though the thread has been taken down, any conversations you have started here can still continue, and if you want to PM a mod to get their opinion on this thread, feel free to do so and they will still be able to weigh in.

For next time, remember that posts about a specific situational advice with a specific person belong in a Basic Questions Thread. (Currently these are on hiatus, but if we can get them back up, they'll happen weekly.)

IGetBoredSometimes23 · 2024-05-28T23:39:58+00:00

"I hate this woman because people admire her" is such a garbage post to be making.

If you're going to hate women for being attractive, you should try celibacy.

Some of y'all listen to too many stupid influencers and need to join the real world, I stg.

If you think of women as "the enemy" you deserve to be single. It's a shitty attitude to have and you're never going to be happy with it.

the idea of validating her with an approach and getting turned down makes me not want to approach.

And this is what it's really about. Your precious ego being bruised from being shot down. It's not about how many other guys admire her, or that she might have high self esteem. It's that you've decided in your head that she's going to reject you and you're insecure about it. Grow up.

You are a fucking child.

Fantastic-Life-2024 · 2024-05-28T16:44:05+00:00

If she wants you she will step into your path.

DaygameCode · 2024-05-28T21:03:25+00:00

Something I don't see talked about much is how do you get past the nauseating feeling of boosting a hot girls ego or validating her?

Don’t shower her with generic compliments, simple as that. And act like you are evaluating her by talking to her rather han acting like you are trying to win her over.

The hot girl at my gym is constantly put on a pedestal by those around her and everyone kisses her ass. She knows she's hot. I'd like to approach her because she's hot, but I also hate the idea of potentially fueling her validation machine even more.

Then don’t compliment her for her looks. And comment that “you’d like to get to know her to see if her personality matches her looks”, that way you are coming from a frame that her looks alone aren’t enough for you to ask for her a date or a number and that you want to explore who she is as a person before making a decision.

I typically don't care about rejection, but with these girls that are clearly 8s and 9s, the idea of validating her with an approach and getting turned down makes me not want to approach.

This sounds like you are more worried about your own ego getting humbled, than on whether you are feeding hers.

You need to accept with humility that not every woman you like will like you back, and that doesn’t mean they are think they are better than you or that you are inferior to them or not good enough. Just not the same wave length and that’s it.

You need to drop this Tate bs of “there is a problem in the world about women who have too much ego because of men…”

You are not here to change the world, you are not a true masculine activist setting an example on other guys who don’t give a fuck about that bs “mission”.

You approach, by taking them right away that you want to get to know them because you think they are interesting, and want to see if their personality is as good as her looks, or not, that sets the frame that you are not sold on her just because she looks good and that she has to prove more than just being hot.

If she rejects you, or she is not interested, that is normal, it’s not something shameful, it’s just part of life. You didn’t give her the validation, you questioned it, and if she is a notch about the rejection she just proved looks are all she has which lowers her validation since her personality clearly doesn’t match her looks.

Lastly, remember that hot women are humans too. You may be prejudging her and maybe she is way more humble than you think she is.

Visualize_ · 2024-05-28T15:15:21+00:00

This might be the stupidest thing I've heard but it's at least a better problem to have because it's less debilitating than being scared of the approach itself. In some way an approach is inherently going to provide validation, there's no way around that. You could control how much validation but ultimately I think trying to manage is just overthinking it. You see a hot girl, you want to talk to her and see if she is interesting. That's pretty much where I would stop with the mindset part. If you get the vibe where she just only uses the conversation to stroke her ego then you know it's not a match, but at least you know for sure. The alternative of not talking to her makes no sense

Title	I want to approach, but I don't want to boost her ego
Author	silver54
Upvotes	0
Comments	14
Date	May 28, 2024 2:54 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1d2lfc9/i_want_to_approach_but_i_dont_want_to_boost_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/i-want-to-approach-but-i-dont-want-to-boost-her.1519807 https://theredarchive.com/post/1519807

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