I consider myself physically attractive. 6’2, lightskin, I’ve been called cute/hot and have the six pack and muscles (recent though) about 15% bf. A lot of people first impressions of me is that I’m some sort of fuck boy, etc, etc.

A lot of this change is new though. I’m 21 and almost had a second puberty or something about a year ago. The treatment and looks I get are completely different than what I’m used to.

However, this all changes as soon as I open my mouth and start talking.

I’m very bad at flirting, just learning now a month ago. Generally the women that I’ve dealt with are very attractive and when they approach me I get super nervous and either two things happen.

  1. I try to play it cool/nonchalant - I think I suck at this. I just ignore them or might make snide remarks but I think this translates into disinterest for them. It could be execution though.

  2. I try small talk - I show internet but ask about dumb shit and can never find myself making a joke. It’s all serious and then I find myself almost interviewing them. Which ultimately ends up being a turn off.

I’m getting better though. But I want to be able to approach women first and not the other way around. I tried tinder and I get a lot of matches/talking stages but they never end up meeting up.

I also want to be able to be playful and exciting to these women. I know I have the physical attraction checked off. But omg does it suck being so close to being able to seduce lmao.

I find alcohol helps, at least sort of. I’m still in my head and catch myself sometimes while talking to a girl. Which only makes me more nervous/awkward.

I can’t help but feel bad about what I have. I know I’m gifted in looks. And I feel this pressure to almost perform at a certain level when it comes to women. Like this one girl I went out with thought I was lying when I told her I was a virgin. And because of this ended cutting things off.