I feels inferior..

c00lstone · 2024-07-06T09:40:03+00:00

Well what are your interests then?

Out of the 4 things you listed I have zero interest in 3 of them. That doesn't mean that I am only one quarter of a man.

Being masculine means a lot of things. If you don't fall into one category of masculinity that doesn't mean you lose your title as a man.

judgefro · 2024-07-06T10:04:45+00:00

There is no such thing as a clean cut sterotypical man. Yay I lot of guys like sports or cars but there are men who work in fashion who make great money and date beautiful women. They are still men.

To me the man who works in the garden, is still as much of a man compared to the one working in the garage. A painter isn't less manly than a handy man. And a stay at home dad playing tea party with his kids is still as much of a man as the ones working a 9-5.

What I'm trying to say is. No one gets to decide what a real man is. Only you, you get to decide what kind of man you are. You don't have to like sports or care (I certainly don't), just enjoy what you like. And if you don't know what you like. You can go and find something. There is a big world full of countless things to do. I still see thing online that I wanna try. Give it time, my man and give yourself a break. Don't judge yourself to hard. We all are still founding ourselves.

SleepingUnderARock · 2024-07-06T14:46:19+00:00

It's normal bro.. you don't need to fit into the cookie cutter male stereotype.. don't put those expectations on yourself. Do what you enjoy doing. And you will find someone who loves you for what you are.

Personally, I've never felt interested in cars or watching sports either. So you aren't alone.

Also 19 is a young age, maybe you are still self discovering. Google '16 personalities' and take that test. You will see how many people share common traits to yourself. I think it will help you

Someoneoldbutnew · 2024-07-06T21:59:17+00:00

gender roles are a restrictive corset. find your passions, embrace them publicly, do not look back

Aquamans-Cousin · 2024-07-06T15:09:12+00:00

As you get older you start to realize, "being a man" is doing what makes you happy and forging your own way. Being a man could be hosting happy hours with friends in the apartment or house you decorated. It could also be working at your job to be the best you can be. Even better yet, you could feel like a man relaxing in the spaces you spent hours curating and taking care of.

You have ample opportunity to find what drives you, there's no need to rush the process. Exploring and figuring this out is a journey into becoming an adult. One tip, surround yourself with people who encourage this journey and distance yourself from the ones who want to stay the same. It'll make the whole thing go a little bit easier.

Empty_Possession6955 · 2024-07-06T17:24:37+00:00

You’re not inferior. If anything you’re superior for knowing yourself well and not trying to fit in just because it’s the thing men do. You need friends with your interests, or at least those who will support your interests. Most of the time if you bring up this concern with long standing friends they will actually support you, but by not having that conversation you may deny them the chance.

That being said, if they don’t support you that’s ok. 7 billion people in the world… if they bash you for your feelings or interests you can thank them for the chance to move on to the other 6,999,999,999 people who may be with your time.

Independent-Hunt2960 · 2024-07-06T19:08:20+00:00

Good, be different. We need different it’s just hard to deal with the loneliness

Input_output_error · 2024-07-06T11:40:41+00:00

Fitting in isn't about what you like or dislike, it is about how you act and present yourself. Try to find things that you have in common instead of focusing on the things that set you apart.

Why do you fear what society will think about you? Society will have its judgement regardless of what you do or say, so why worry about it? The only thing that you can control is who you are, and ultimately that is the only thing that really matters.

Treat everyone just as you like to be treated, and treat people with the respect that they deserve. Everyone deserves an equal amount of respect until they proof otherwise. Confront yourself with your own limitations/wrongdoings but do not linger on them, learn from them and do better the next time.

You are you, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with you. You deserve to be here and be yourself, be proud of the man that you are! Strive to be the best version of yourself that you can be. Liking something or not does not make a man, you get to decide what kind of man that you want to be.

Fallen-Shadow-1214 · 2024-07-06T15:53:18+00:00

Do you want to talk one on one? Dms are open if so.

lovingkindnesscomedy · 2024-07-07T19:36:20+00:00

Great news: It's totally fine that you can't relate to most men in your environment. It means nothing about you. All it means is you should probably go out of your way to meet a more diverse range of people.

Do you live in a big enough city to find meetups, events, and other ways to meet new people? Such as martial arts or art classes or whatever you're into.

Be yourself, show who you are, and you'll eventually connect with the right people.

I'm also not interested in the things you mentioned (especially cars) and I've never seen it as an issue. By meeting new people regularly I eventually find folks I vibe with. And that can include someone who's into cars by the way! That's the other thing: interests can be quite superficial. It's not necessarily what makes a friendship. But yeah if you don't connect with the guys around you, maybe you need to meet new people.

You'll be fine! It's just important to do what it takes to find your people.

Title	I feels inferior..
Author	Connect_Scale3860
Upvotes	13
Comments	12
Date	July 6, 2024 8:50 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MenSupportMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/mensupportmen/comments/1dwl994/i_feels_inferior/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MenSupportMen/i-feels-inferior.1523431 https://theredarchive.com/post/1523431

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