Getting the conversation going after getting the number

pepotero · 2025-03-24T21:19:02+00:00

Search other threads about this topic. Long story short, it's the nature of clubs. Think of it as one night only event. You either pull or you don't, that night. Numbers are worthless.

Try day game or bars. Or anything else. Those numbers are a bit more solid.

Upbeat-Protection-67 · 2025-03-24T21:38:52+00:00

You already sent the message, ball is in her court now. Find something else to keep preoccupied. Don’t come off as clingy

StrikingImportance39 · 2025-03-24T21:23:33+00:00

During night game you should always be trying to pull.

90% of numbers you will get will be flakes.

That’s because women are drunk, they forget people, and emotions they felt, also they are giving numbers to almost everyone who asks.

So it’s very unlikely, she will respond.

gtaIIIstan · 2025-03-25T00:13:46+00:00

As others have said, with clubs, it's best to make moves in the moment and take the interaction as far as you can. You claim you were "in a hurry," but were you really?! Or was it a defense mechanism because you were afraid of messing things up if you stayed longer?

On that point, never be a phone number bandit. Sounds like you guys barely connected. You opened, you closed, and then you dipped. Sure, in the moment, she was receptive. But then the dust settles in the morning and she realizes she doesn't know a single thing about you -- other than the fact that she was sending you feelers all night, you finally approached, and then you scurried off.

Finally, you tried to do way too much with your first message, and were a bit too formal with everything ("I'm writing you this text so that you have my number." That doesn't even need to be stated.) As a general rule, text messages should only be trying to do one thing at a time and the first message should always be something LOW INVESTMENT. You just want to call back to the good vibe from the interaction. A commonality. An inside joke. Keep it light and playful. Then based on how she responds, then you can start escalating to date plans. But in order to have that callback humor to draw upon, you actually have to have a full interaction, not be a phone number bandit.

Mefick · 2025-03-25T00:33:27+00:00

You made several mistakes, that's why she didn't answer, but no problem, I'll tell you what I think you did wrong.

1) Many guys in the comments on your post said that numbers are irrelevant at a club and that the next day she won't remember you, but I disagree. If you have a strong connection with her at the club, make her laugh and feel attracted and especially kiss her, she will definitely give you her number and she will be dying to get home and send you a message. But in your case, that didn't happen. You didn't create a connection. She looked at you, you looked back but didn't go to her. Only when you left the club did you take her number and leave. That made you seem like a guy who didn't have the courage to approach her and that lowered your value.

2) Let's assume that even though you didn't say anything to her, you just asked for her number and left. She's still interested, she gets home, goes to sleep and as soon as she wakes up she sees your extremely formal message. This was an observation that a guy made in your post. I think it would have been better if you had sent a more playful message like "Good morning, you didn't take your eyes off me last night. I was almost calling the security guards lol". Anyway, don't be so formal with women you're interested in, it makes you look like a robot in a job interview.

3) And finally, stop, JUST STOP, putting yourself down, putting women on a pedestal, stop treating them as if they were above you, as if they were too much, above your level, this is a bad mentality that brings you down, you may not notice, but when you treat a woman as someone above you, you end up having a withdrawn posture and speech, of fear and discomfort. All the women who will look at you will see that you are nervous and afraid, because you are putting yourself down, you should focus on becoming better but never ever put yourself down.

Western-Month-3877 · 2025-03-24T22:00:06+00:00

What was so important that you gotta leave after you approached her? Close on her instead of having a goal to just get her number.

Each time I get their numbers I struggle to get the conversation flowing.

Getting a number is NOT an accomplishment.

Imagine a salesman knocking on your door and after a small talk he tells you “let’s meet again, I’ll call you tomorrow ok?” Clearly it doesn’t make sense from his POV. He plans to create another opportunity that might not happen yet while he skips the momentum that is actually happening right in front of his eyes. He just wasted opportunity to close the sale. Such a waste.

VarietyFinancial8263 · 2025-03-24T22:54:57+00:00

Send one more message asking her schedule so she doesn’t think you forgot about her, since it was 4 am

chexserial · 2025-03-24T23:25:50+00:00

I would just leave it. If you gonna double text, at the very most send “?”, and then call it quits

LucaCoco_ · 2025-03-25T04:46:58+00:00

You should talk to her more before asking for number.

Title	Getting the conversation going after getting the number
Author	Jiseido
Upvotes	8
Comments	9
Date	March 24, 2025 9:13 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1jj24w7/getting_the_conversation_going_after_getting_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-the-conversation-going-after-getting-the.1547520 https://theredarchive.com/post/1547520

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