I (28M) matched with a girl (20F) on Bumble. She lives about 100 km away. One thing about me is I like to schedule dates quickly. She told me she was at the hospital because of some stomach pain. I asked if someone was with her, she said no. Jokingly, I said, “Why don’t you ask me to come?” She took it seriously and said she actually wanted me there. It was quick and very good connection.

I started driving. About halfway, she messaged that she’d been discharged and gone home — but that I could still pick her up and we could book a motel to spend the night together. I thought, okay, sounds like a plan.

I went to her house, picked her up, and we made out in the car. We grabbed dinner, then went to book the motel. Throughout this time, she never indicated she wasn’t interested in anything physical. She was fine with sharing a single bed.

Inside the motel, we relaxed on the bed and cuddled. She was still cooperative until she suddenly said she didn’t want sex on the first date. I said okay, but I was a bit surprised — the whole scenario (driving that far, her inviting me, booking a motel late at night, making out multiple times) seemed to suggest otherwise.

For context, one thing about me is that I like sex, so yeah — it’s important to me. If someone doesn’t want that, I completely respect it, but I appreciate it when they say so clearly from the start so I can make plans and put in effort accordingly.

I told her if she needed space, I could have booked a room with two beds or we could have spent the money doing something else. She started to look upset, I felt like it's not worth spending time anymore so I asked if she wanted to go home. She said yes, so I packed up and dropped her off at 2 AM.

The next morning, she messaged me asking how I was, but since then her replies have been inconsistent, so I moved on.

I understand and respect that she has the right to say no at any point, and I didn’t push after she made it clear. But I’m wondering — am I wrong for assuming she wanted sex given the way the night unfolded? Would it have been better for her to say upfront if she didn’t want anything physical so we could plan differently?