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[–]livingthedreamnow 16 points17 points18 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
After I spent 11 years catering to my wife, giving her everything she asked for, putting up with her ridiculous shit tests, demanding nothing of her, and she in turn divorce raped me, took my kids, 60% of my accumulated wealth, and 30% of my earnings for the next 9 years.
That kind of screwing will yank the cord out of the back of your head pretty quick. It's been years now, and TRP living has given me a life infinitely better than anything I've ever had before.
[–]CapnZack53 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
While my awakening wasn't quite this rough, there are similarities. However, I was cheated on and tried to do it myself. (And failed miserably). An open relationship became involved and most of 2012 and 2013 were spent in an untreated haze of depression. It might be BP of me but I'm still with my wife. (Can't afford a divorce.) But I have taken control. I have made a point of turning myself around, which has, in turn, improved my marriage. I'm sure I'll catch hell for this but I don't give a shit. To me, TRP means doing your own thing, finding your happy even if it takes the rest of your life. And I believe that is exactly what I'm doing.
[–]PBRistasty 4 points5 points6 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Ignore the posts, read all the sidebar material. The postings here are made by men at all stages of swallowing TRP, and from all ages as well.
Understanding the underlying reasons why women act the way they do, and realising that some aspects will be stronger in some women as opposed to others , will allow you to view each women you observe with clear eyes and allow you to discover what buttonw to push.
at 3 times your age I swallowed the red pill after being married 25 years to a women who was incredibly smart but who would do shit that a 12 year old would question. This shit works because for the most part it is based on biological, behaviorial, and evolutionary science that has been reported for decades. There is almost nothing on the sidebar(except maybe Roosh) that cannot be independantly validated. That I think is one resason why most feminists and Beta's tend to despise it, is because they cant point to a single precept and disprove it.
[–]Duskex 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You mean the required theory section or just generally all of it?
[–]1independentmale 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
It was a long, slow progression for me.
I started noticing behaviors in marriages, including my own, that were completely fucked up. A friend of mine had a wife who gave him a curfew and a bedtime, which he (alarmingly) went along with. While this is an extreme example, others were much more prevalent:
Going out with friends always resulted in drama and fighting. My wife and my buddy's wives were all so worried their loser beta husbands (yes, that was me at the time, too) were going to cheat on them, we weren't allowed to go out without them (and they never wanted to go out). Especially to a bar. God forbid we have a few drinks, shoot some pool and enjoy some man time. One night I told 'em all to go fuck themselves and a few buddies and I went out anyway. It became a huge issue, I was cast as a troublemaker and several of my friends were actually "prohibited" by their wives from hanging out with me. Sadly, those pussies are still grounded and we aren't friends anymore, it's been years now.
There was no privacy. The wives demanded passwords to email accounts, phones, etc. They would snoop through their husbands' phones to make sure he wasn't saying things she didn't agree with. I refused to give up my passwords and it was a serious issue in my marriage, as all of our mutual friends were folding to the demands. "We're married, we don't keep things from each other." The few times I let her snoop, she would just lecture me on everything. She didn't like the way I phrased x. Maybe I should think about y instead. She doesn't like the way (insert random friend here) talks, you shouldn't be friends with people like that. Overbearing bullshit.
Any kind of fun, really, was a problem. It seemed when us men got together and did things that men do, the women would create drama and levy accusations or otherwise try to put a stop to our activity.
There was a lot of pedestalizing, doing whatever the wife wants, "If mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." The women tended to control the money, even though they weren't earning it. The men were kept on allowances. I bucked this trend, too, and retained complete control over my family's finances (I earned 100% of the money, she didn't work a day during our marriage, I'll be damned if I was going to be put on a fucking allowance.)
Sex was a tool for control and nothing else. They rarely put out and when they did, it was manipulative. When a friend's wife decided I was a bad influence, she started tempting him with sex every time he made plans with me. We saw through it pretty quickly, but he was too much of a pussy to call her out on it (after dry spells lasting for months on end, it was easy for her to use sex to keep him at home on the nights I had something fun going on).
It was abuse. Really, everything these bitches did was emotionally abusive to their husbands. They wanted to wear the pants in the relationships and their pussy husbands let them. It took me a long time, but roughly 10 years into my 15 year marriage, I wised up and took my balls back. Things went down hill from there. After letting her control me for so long, she couldn't possibly comprehend what had happened. I was accused of everything from cheating, to being on drugs, to being secretly gay after I stopped begging for sex and quit giving a fuck about her needs.
I found TRP after I divorced her. This sub brought substance in understanding the behaviors and attitudes I'd already witnessed and rejected as anything I'd be willing to put up with again. It was nice to find like-minded men.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 12 years ago* (9 children) | Copy Link
A while back, I met this cute Colombian girl through a friend at a going away party he had thrown. She showed up with dude friend. At first glance, I just assumed it was her boyfriend. He ends up leaving to meet up with his girlfriend, and leaves this girl without a ride home. We get to talking, and we hit it off pretty well. I end up giving her a ride home because she had no other way of getting home. Next morning, she contacts me, telling me what a great time we had, what great conversation, etc. I went all BP, trying to set up a future date. But I was way too impatient, gave her the impression I was needy, etc. Ended up in the friendzone.
I continued to hang out with her, however, with false hopes of "winning her over" by being the genuinely awesome person I am. We had a lot of good times, but it was very apparent to me that she wanted to be friends. I still had this belief that I could still win her over, though.
Then one fateful Friday night, we went out to the bar to shoot some pool. 30 minutes before last call, we're suddenly playing pool with these two other dudes. I was pretty faded, so I don't know how this started, but I can assume she initiated it. Then one of those guys left, and it was her and the remaining dude vs. me. Then on came the lights, it was time to go. I went to take a piss, came out, and she was nowhere to be found.
I made a meager attempt to get the phone number of one of the servers she was friends with. I got the "No, I can't. I have a boyfriend." I laughed it off saying "Oh okay." In truth, I was drunk and tired and wanted to go home.
As I was walking to do the door, she came back inside. So I'm walking out the door with this girl, I tell her I tried to get the server's number, but she said no. Girl turns to me, smirks, and says "Well guess who I'm going home with?"
I became instantly infuriated and hurt. I didn't say anything, I looked at her for a few seconds, then walked to my car, got in, started it, and looked over at her. (She was parked next to me.) She stood there, collecting her shit together. That's when I realized this bitch really is going to go home with some dude she probably spent no more than 15-20 minutes talking to.
I drove off. My emotions were twisted. I'm just glad I didn't get myself or anybody else killed on the drive home. Upon arriving home, I sent her a few texts telling her that I couldn't believe I wasted my time on her, and that she could go fuck herself.
Never heard from her since. I got over the hurt pretty quickly, because this is something that has happened plenty of times before. But something changed, I knew that there was something fundamentally wrong with my way of thinking. Then I found this subreddit. And it cemented what I was beginning to already figure out on my own.
Weirdest thing is, after reading quite a few articles from therationalmale, my resentments towards this girl have vanished, because my perspective had changed. Had I known about this earlier, I would have given 0 fucks who she went home with. Then again, if I had known about this WAY earlier, I would probably have been banging her on the regular.
[–]ModMachiavellianRed 7 points8 points9 points 12 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
In a nut shell: women extract favors/attention/time/resources from betas whilst allowing them to think "something could come from their investment" whilst alphas get to fuck them for little investment shortly after they meet. This fucks up the guy who invested so much in the chick because he's put all this time and effort in and she won't co-operate, whilst the dude who just waltzed in is getting what the beta has been after for weeks/months. BPers spin this and say "these guys feel like they're entitled to sex, she's a victim blah blah" but that doesn't hold up to reason, it's bullshit, if guys weren't being lead on and allowed to think they had a chance with a girl they wouldn't waste time and money on her only for her to eventually reject them and shit on them by giving away the goodies to another guy who hadn't even put half the effort into her that the beta did.
These chicks feign ignorance and employ plausible deniability, but these chicks know what they're doing when they're using a guy up for food/lifts/money/gifts They can hamster it as "that's what friends do" but its just bullshit that allows them sleep at night and keep their conscience in check. If you're a pretty girl and a guy is bending over backwards for you and he's not a member of the family/gay, he is attracted to you - period.
When a guy "who is beta" sees how unfair the game is, and how certain types of guys get what they want out of her for little investment, and other guys like him who invest a lot get nothing other than rejection from chicks, they get frustrated and that is often their moment of awakening, they decide to "become like the guy who gets laid" which generally means turning from a supplicating nice guy into a brash asshole.
Women ask "where did all the good guys go?" the answer is the good guys turn bad because chicks won't fuck any of the good guys, they just use them up instead. If you actively reward assholes with sex but leave the nice guys dry, the nice guys one by one, learning the hard way change themselves in order to get what they want out of life, and that's not being a woman's "gay best friend" or backup "we'll get married if we're both single at 30" dick. Who wants the beat up pussy, sagging tits and aging wrinkly body of a woman past her prime, the scraps from another mans conquest? Nobody. If women don't want to be left on the shelf they should marry/get serious from a guy at a young age and fuck about less, but hey, feminism is encouraging the opposite and these bitches expect to be able to have their cake and eat it too by abusing the carousel/betas in their youth and then getting a nice white collar beta husband post-prime.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
Couldn't agree more. In this case, I was being used for my knowledge in IT. She recently moved into an IT position, and she hasn't a clue what the hell she is doing. So guess who was swooping in to save the day.
Not anymore.
You hit the nail on the head with the hamstering it as "that's what friends do." She said that verbatim to me, at one point during that night.
[–]Duskex 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That really scares me. What do you suggest as an option to someone in that situation? Ditch the girl or stop giving a fuck and being there?
I do too many favours for this girl but we still have intimate moments, just no sex because she's afraid of relationships. Should I put aside my will for a relationship and just go with alpha instincts? The only reason I tread carefully is to preserve the plausibility of a relationship.
I've been having TRP thoughts without knowing it. I see why the sub is frowned upon; it comes off as misogynistic and I don't doubt there are misogynists within who really aren't pure at heart, but there is incredible, overwhelming logic here too. Women are manipulative and have different ways of having emotions than us men. A large majority of us will see the unbalance of a relationship and cut it off, but sadly a large majority of the women are the opposite. I feel a little guilty for admitting it, but if you step back and look at the bigger picture it makes ugly sense. I'm freaked out man.
Well, ultimately, the blame is my own. So if that's scary to you, perhaps it's because you're afraid to take the blame when you end up in that situation. But, in any case, you need to take a long hard look at yourself and the situation, removing the expectations, and ask yourself, "Is she worth keeping around?"
What I'm doing is giving myself some time to do the things I should've been doing, rather than waiting around hoping her feelings would change. I'm a monster when it comes to IT, but I've settled for shit jobs because I've had personal issues of low self-esteem/self-worth. I used to be a push over, because I was afraid of hurting other people's feelings, and took other's feelings way too seriously. That all changed when I rage-quit my last job, after realizing my worth ethic was being abused. I spent a good five minutes in a rage, still debating if walking out was the right thing to do. 99% of my thoughts said no, because of what I had been told by other people what the "responsible" thing to do was. I decided to listen to that 1% telling me that I didn't want to be there, and fuck what everybody else though or told me in the past. It changed my life. Ironically, they still call me asking to cover shifts. Funny how that works.
As far as this girl, I'm sure if I sent her a text, asking if she REALLY wanted to be friends, she would reply, because she's not the shittiest of women I've met. I think she realizes that she fucked up. I certainly had value, and a value that was important to her. See my response to /u/MachiavellianRed. But, ultimately, I could only do that knowing that I could ONLY be friends with her. And that's not necessarily a bad thing. Going out to a bar/club with a female friend that is attractive helps you meet other women. I'm currently not in that mindset to try and reconnect with her, though. Perhaps after I've got myself where I want to be, and maybe even spinning a few plates, I might decide to hit her up. Then again, at that point, I may have zero interest in keeping her around.
[–]_Just_do_it -3 points-2 points-1 points 12 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Jesus what a dirty slut. Dodged a bullet with that one mate.
[–]1KyfhoMyoba 2 points3 points4 points 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Don't hate. AWALT. Hypergamy is a feature, not a bug.
[–]_Just_do_it -1 points0 points1 point 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True, but doesn't make her being a slut any less of a fact.
[–]Duskex 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's not what this is about.
Call her what you will, she taught me an important lesson. No matter what you do for a woman, if you're not banging her from the get-go, you're more than likely not going to be banging her while you're trying to kiss her ass.
Besides, calling one girl a slut is calling 'em all a slut. They're only sluts if they banging everybody but you.
And, to give her a bit of credit, she did pay for that bar tab that night. She paid for me to go see a movie with her on a previous hang out, as well. She did enjoy my company very much. I was just too BP to see things weren't going to move past the friendzone.
[–]thredditsowaway 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
After a particularly harsh rejection by another generally unimpressive girl, I decided that I need to stop doing what others tell me to do, stop doing what is supposed to be "morally right," and start doing what works. That's all TRP is. I started reading up on "what works" and discovered one book or forum after another until it led me here.
Set aside your feelings about this sub. Set aside all of your feelings. Just focus on finding what gets results for you, and model your behaviours after what works for others. Want girls? See muscular guys getting girls? Then lift. Want money? See engineers making lots of money? Become an engineer.
Do yourself a favour and learn as much as you can about "what works" before going off to college. I missed most of that experience because I was too busy hating the man I was about to become.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
After a two year long relationship I was extremely broken and lost. After about six months I stumbled on here and rejected it because I was a mangina. A year later I came back and realized the huge mistake I had made. You're 17 and you've found this sub, you're fine dude. Don't believe what other people say about theredpill, I've been 10x more satisfied and happy since I found it.
Trust me those people will talk shit, but let me ask you, how many of them are happy, satisfied, and productive in their lives? Not many. How many of them are virgins or have very little social and sexual experience? Almost all of them. So trust me, keep coming here and I guarantee you will get the guidance you need.
Read the sidebar. Also just because some posts annoy you doesn't mean the main idea isn't good. I mean that's pretty much 98% of subs on reddit, most people like them(not me) but sometimes they don't always agree with everything. But it's a good thing to not agree with everything, it means that you're smart and possess some level of critical thinking skills.
[–][deleted] 12 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I wouldn't use "follow" as an apt descriptor.
I've always been RP, I just never knew there where others who thought similarly to me until I found TRP. I first came here after it was mentioned in askreddit with such disdain. I was interested to see what a sub had to do in order to be hated so much by the hive mind.
TRP has helped me immensely. It's given thought and discourse to some of what I couldn't previously describe.
[–]deepsouthscoundrel 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
There wasn't one specific moment, no. I was first exposed to this way of thinking when I was sixteen. There was an initial shift in my thought processes at that time, and over the years I've been shown over and over again that these tenets are true.
Your opinion will solidify one way or another in time and in exposure to the real world.
[–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Plenty of posts irk me too, but such is a mass forum.
Personally I've had some TRP stuff taught to me by my father, but most of it I was too idealistic to believe. Then after a few bad experiences with girls I realized that what I was doing and believed was wrong and started to look to find the answer. Over the years TRP, even before TRP existed, started to become proven in my experiences and then a set belief.
[–]bringer_of_fight 0 points1 point2 points 12 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
When I read the core principles and found them to be true, I began to act on it.
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[–]livingthedreamnow 16 points17 points18 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]CapnZack53 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]PBRistasty 4 points5 points6 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Duskex 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]1independentmale 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]ModMachiavellianRed 7 points8 points9 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Duskex 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]_Just_do_it -3 points-2 points-1 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]1KyfhoMyoba 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]_Just_do_it -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Duskex 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]thredditsowaway 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]deepsouthscoundrel 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorUsherai 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bringer_of_fight 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link