Right now we’re separated sorta. She’s in a trailer in the yard but uses the house for laundry, showers etc. As much as I don’t want to want it, I think I want her to leave the property. Just take the trailer and go to a trailer park. She’s leaving me. She’s seeing other people. Yet I’m still helping her in little ways. I can’t stomach the thought of not being with her so I think the reality is I need her gone so I can heal. Part of me hopes she’s see all the little things I did for her and she’ll change her mind and come back. But is that what I want?

Am I ok asking her to just go already? She’ll be leaving her dog - she’s my dog too but I do all the daily care. We’ve got a teenager who’s been heading out to say goodnight to mom most nights when I have to tell her she’s still out with “friends”.

Am I the bad guy? Cuz I feel like a monster but her being there as a ghost, a constant reminder is killing me.