I can't handle my annoyance and anger

SeaMuted9754 · 2026-06-25T16:00:25+00:00

I think therapy is the best solution here because you need the tools to communicate what is really getting you angry. It’s not the small things because you know it but it’s something the small things are representing to you.

Then you can communicate more effectively with your partner and not attack them.

SunRose42 · 2026-06-25T17:48:57+00:00

I think you need individual therapy, and maybe couple’s therapy, too. If you need a doctor to prescribe it to you, then go see the doctor and tell them you’re depressed and experiencing anger issues. Like seriously, I would prioritize this. Built up resentment is a real relationship killer. You have to deal with that, and if you can’t, the relationship has run its course. You can’t be losing it every time the guy watches a loud video.

If you’re really averse to therapy, then maybe look into writing in a diary, meditation, confiding in a friend, etc. And make sure you’re keeping up with other aspects of mental health, like regular socialization, exercise, eating healthy, getting good sleep, etc. But I wouldn’t give this much longer if you try that stuff for a while and it’s just not working.

EDIT: Oh yeah, and when he follows you when you’ve gone to calm down, just tell him you’re struggling with your mental health lately and just need some space to yourself to get calm.

edu-ellie · 2026-06-25T19:55:27+00:00

When things are feeling this intense, it can be helpful to look at other areas of life. Back to basics. If you pull up maslows hierarchy of needs, assess how you're doing with sleep, eating well, physical activity, being financially secure, social beyond marriage, having educational outlets and hobbies. I know that's A LOT, and that's the point. That's everything I had to sort out before landing here. If those things slip, it can feel (and maybe actually be) overwhelming or impossible to apply RP.

Jenneapolis · 2026-06-25T22:04:21+00:00

Meditation, prayer, therapy, mindfulness, reading, etc. You really have to do a complete overhaul of yourself internally. You really have to work on giving up control, you don’t control everything and you definitely don’t control him. The readings on the wiki are what got me here.

AutoModerator · 2026-06-25T15:52:38+00:00

Title: I can't handle my annoyance and anger

Author Fine-Flight-8599

Full text: So I have a lot of resentment from our relationship in The past. There were times when My need weren't met (like he was in The army and didn't put in an effort to try). I know all of those aren't his fault, but I feel like after that I'm overly conscious about little things _going_ to be a problem at some point.

I get overly angry and annoyed about little things. For example: watching YouTube videos at dinner table, him touching his private parts randomly and not washing hands after, him forgetting something he promised... Etc. So small problems, but for some reason important to me.

I have tried to just swallow my anger and not let it affect anything. But if I do that, I literally need to go outside to cry for an hour or something. The feeling just feels so overwhelming and distressing that I can't for The life of me behave normally after it cools down.

I need to do something to this, because I don't have time or emotional capacity to go calm down multiple times every day. But I don't know what would help. If you have any advice it would be very apperciated.

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fg_hj · 2026-06-28T21:03:25+00:00

To me it sounds like an attachment trauma that is constantly being triggered. The healing from attachment trauma is to be in relationships where you feel truly safe and seen. It will always trigger you if you don’t have your needs met. So he should absolutely meet them if it’s going to hold.

EnvironmentalCraft48 · 2026-06-28T11:11:03+00:00

You sound reasonably annoyed bc he is being gross and rude. I don't know why women gaslight themselves. Go to couples counseling if you are having a hard time expressing yourself to him.

Communicating your expectations will help you become less avoidant and resentful towards him, while also helping him become more conscientious. If you are being respectful and present in the relationship, it is not ridiculous to want the same from him. That is the bare minimum.

Title	I can't handle my annoyance and anger
Author	Fine-Flight-8599
Upvotes	1
Comments	11
Date	June 25, 2026 3:52 PM UTC (3 weeks ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1ufdxwt/i_cant_handle_my_annoyance_and_anger/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/i-cant-handle-my-annoyance-and-anger.1583603 https://theredarchive.com/post/1583603

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