The idea of hypergamy says that females choose as high up in the male hierarchy as they can.

In western society, that hierarchy is often called the dominance hierarchy, but as some established scientists and researchers have explained, it’s really more of a competence hierarchy, because it’s based on how competent you are and how well you do what you do in your life.

I’ve spent a lot of the past year digging in and really observing and analyzing relationships and attraction, and one of the most obvious conclusions I’ve made is that average/typical girls get with average/typical guys; NOT higher quality guys as predicted by hypergamy. What I mean by typical girls is this: average to low IQ, spend lots of time scrolling, being lazy, wasting time, gossiping, and messing with pointless drama. No working out, no active hobbies, victim mindset, aloof. These types of girls are getting with guys who are also very average. They aren’t getting with the best guy in the environment; the guy who has a great body and works out regularly, the guy who has the highest position at work, the guy who has all his finances in order, the guy who works the hardest. No. These girls who are a mess are with guys who aren’t much less of a mess than they are.

And it’s not like they don’t have any access to higher quality guys. They do. They just don’t get with them...maybe because those higher quality guys are too boring; there’s too much intellectual disconnect.

It does seem to make sense. Why would a girl who lays at the house every day and can barely hold a job want a highly conscientious guy who is always on the go? They don’t. These kinds of girls want very average guys who will chill with them at the house all day and just make ‘em feel good. That’s it. There could be a higher quality man nearby and she won’t go for him because there’s too much lifestyle disconnect.

And a majority of high quality guys I know are with high quality girls (more intelligent, have their own lives and hobbies, work harder, etc)

This is a potential issue I see with the concept of hypergamy. I think the “quality levels” of people play much more of a role than many people here seem to think, and girls tend to stay within their “levels” because they enjoy the feeling of connection that they can’t get from a guy who is way better than them. If you have any points to refute, it’d be great to discuss this further.