I know this is not a "break-up" forum, but i honestly need help to improve myself and my situation.

I feel like a giant pussy. I fell an urge to cry after this break-up, and i feel to emotional. I DON'T WANT TO.

I've read a lot in the sidebar, I've read some of the books "NMMNG" and others, and although i see the point in them, because i DO, i still have a very hard time getting it into my head.

Short story. Been with this girl for 14 months. She started to have me not as her 1st priority. I told her, that she needed to think about us and not just her, or else i couldn't stay in this. She then said, her feelings might not be in it any more.

She moved to her fathers, got a couple of days to think, and two days ago she was more or less 100 % sure. So well, she dumped me.

What do i know?

She's not the ONE. I will find others who are min. the same or even better. She didn't prioritice me, so fuck her, i should always be nr. 1.

I absolutely know all of those things above. Few months before this break-up, i helped a friend getting through his break-up. But i can't seem to follow my own advice. Even though i know all above are true, i still feel:

I wan't her back. I want to be comfortable with her again. All the things we had. I even fell like i would go back to the same relationship, even though i wasn't first priortity, and that is F*** not how it's supposed to be!

Why do i still feel these things, even though i know, that i will be better, find better and more?

I try to work on myself. New clothes, working out, cardio aswell. But even though i do it for myself, i still think of her when doing it.

I'm not unattractive, i haven't had problems getting laid before and i won't have now. But again, it feels so wrong and i get nausea just thinking about it. Same when i'm on Tinder. I'm looking at these hot girls, i've got a lot of matches already, but i do get a sick feeling in me, whenever i see someone who is similar to her, same name or same sports as her.

I've gone NC the last two days, but again i feel like i'm doing it with the only purpose to "win her back" - Make her think, Why isn't he contacting me, so she will come back.

I know it would be completely wrong to get her back, ask for her back, and i would be better of with her. But why the F***** can't i feel that instead of just knowing it?! It makes me angry, furious that i feel like this helpless little pussy.

I know i need to get my shit together and grow some balls. But i need guidence and advice on how to get their.

I spend time with friends. I work-out, cardio, i try to make things going for me right now, so i get my mind of it. But when i work out, i feel more and more tired in my body, again because of think of her, and how i want to improve myself for her.

I'm so blue, and i really need help!