Recovering AFC, been dating girl, think she's friending me, not sure on how to proceed without just 'nexting'

JTPish · 2017-07-07T16:21:17+00:00

Your next meeting should be more intimate and you should continue kino and escalate. The date should only last an hour or two. Aim for heading back to her place or your place by the end of two hours. You should be making it clear it is time to go to the next step (but also give her the plausible deniability her female mind requires.) "You should come over and see (insert interesting thing here)." This should be any neat hobby or skill you have.

Continue escalation when in private, and get her in bed. If you can't get her to come over for private time, end the date and next her. If you can't get her naked in your bed/on your couch/kitchen table/ whatever, next her immediately.

LordThunderbolt · 2017-07-07T16:42:16+00:00

Nowhere do you mention that you actually kissed or did anything sexual with her. So if I get this straight, in your mind you expect to go on about 12 dates until the point where she just hiked up her dress, rolls her panties down, bends over and points at her pussy and say "I'd like you to put your cock here now sir, please. If you want to".

You're wasting she time with these dates because you're not escalating sexually. You're like a set of keys or a lamp to her at this point.

mallardcove · 2017-07-07T16:23:28+00:00

Shit or get off the pot(escalate)

Also sounds like you need abundance.

Andromeda1985 · 2017-07-07T16:53:25+00:00

Honestly it sounds like you should next her and sit down and think about what went wrong.

The most obvious thing to me is your frame. TRP talks a lot about frame and frame control. I think a lot of guys struggle with what frame actually is because it requires a degree of self awareness that a lot of guys just dont' have.

I won't attempt to define it, because if i do and you misinterpret it you wont' be better off. instead I'll try to reinforce the point of it and you can understand it from the correct perspective.

The point of frame control is to understand how women perceive you. Everything about you. Your behavior, diction, and appearance are likely the 3 most critical factors. Which essentially means being in greater control of what you say, what you do, and how you look. Especially in the context of what that means to other people.

When it comes to attracting someone, they will have a base set of minimum criteria they look for. My favorite comparison is in job placement. There will be a minimum set of criteria for you to qualify for the position. Girls, too, have a minimum set of criteria they look for. you likely meet that criteria and that's reinforced by the fact you've gotten at least one date.

but you know just as well as i do, that qualifying for a job does not guarantee placement into that job. you still need to pass the interview and then actually do the job. and a lot of guys fail to understand this. they take the approach of 'there's no reason she shouldn't like me'

And they are right. there isn't a reason. but there's also no reason why she should like you. you only meet the minimum requirements. who in their right mind would settle for minimum if they don't have to?

Next her and work on your frame control. You've missed something fundamental. something about you, your behavior, your appearance, your diction, isn't setting a proper sexual frame. everything you need is in the sidebar.

To be blunt: You're not attractive. and I mean that in a cosmic sense, not just physical beauty. you're not properly giving her a reason to want to be with you. this is why you get friendzoned.

McCoop_ · 2017-07-07T20:16:36+00:00

She's doing her part by giving you chances to make a move. Take action next meet up or it's basically friendzoning yourself.

Edit: also don't call going on two dates "dating". People typically reserve that term for long term relationships. I know it's stupid but "dating" is used this way primarily

Peter_B_Long · 2017-07-07T23:54:47+00:00

Letting her lead the date idea was a mistake on your part. Women want a leader. Your best bet is to escalate for sure. Escalate to sex somehow. If she keeps pushing you back, then just next her.

Title	Recovering AFC, been dating girl, think she's friending me, not sure on how to proceed without just 'nexting'
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	2
Comments	10
Date	July 7, 2017 4:01 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/6lulpq/recovering_afc_been_dating_girl_think_shes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/recovering-afc-been-dating-girl-think-shes.180140 https://theredarchive.com/post/180140

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