gf wants to see ex, how do I react?

PandaMoneyLove · 2015-03-05T01:40:10+00:00

My current gf had a "best friend" who was a guy, who had proposed to her little over a year ago. You can't have some pussy trying to get at your girl because when you fight with her, she'll go to him. Your girl is going to fuck him and lie to you, and the second you get in a big fight she'll go to him. I solved my problem by calling up my ex and inviting her over, your gf will get pissed/jealous and agree to stop seeing the guy.

SkorchZang · 2015-03-05T02:09:36+00:00

so there is no way she would cheat on me with him

Yes way. All it takes is the right feeling at the right time, and she's doing it. It's that random and dumb.

I don't want to be controlling but I don't really trust her either.

Good to hear, because you should never trust a woman to be loyal. The controlling thing... that's for betas to worry about, what you mainly want to avoid is coming across as desperate to keep her. That's why if I were in your shoes I'd phrase it something like this for her:

"Of course babe, you can see whoever you want. Do what makes you happy, I support you."

Then she's like 'yay!", but you say: "Of course you understand that if you do that, you and I, it's over. We can still be good friends with benefits and all, but if you're seeing ex's... this exclusive thing doesn't work, obviously."

She pleads that "it's only as friends".

"Hey! Like I said, babe, it's up to you... but if you want to stay with me, you have to hold up your part of the bargain. How would YOU have felt if I called a couple ex's and started hanging out with those bitches? Exactly."

badp4nd4 · 2015-03-05T00:30:01+00:00

Absolutely not, she is going to either cheat on you with him or leave you for him.

Either you put your foot down now or you will regret it later.

There is no gray area here in my opinion.

Red-Zen · 2015-03-05T01:27:19+00:00

I don't really trust her

This is all that you need to know.

Downgrade to plate status.

webroketheinternet · 2015-03-05T00:44:21+00:00

Next.

FrameWalker · 2015-03-05T01:48:55+00:00

Sorry dude. Keep looking for a better LTR candidate.

Axoc · 2015-03-05T02:36:49+00:00

she kissed him

If she's told you that, what have they done that she hasn't told you about?

making out with some slut

This shows a lack of self control and a disregard for the relationship. Alphas have self control, first and foremost, before any other trait. When she realized you didn't have self control, she lost respect for you and you stopped being alpha in her eyes. Since you're also trying to fuck around, she thinks she's your plate, so she got a plate of her own to make you jealous. An eye for an eye, in her mind.

as revenge

This means whenever she thinks you do something wrong, she'll try to punish you by cheating with him. This is literally the same way you train a dog: if they aren't doing what you want, you punish them in a way that, while effective, many find sadistic.

The way she's training you is sadistic but it will be effective. Eventually you will be too afraid and become beta. She is dominating you and this guy is cucking you and you're acting like everything is okay.

Downgrade to plate status, lurk more, read the entire sidebar.

babydocnorman · 2015-03-05T02:51:48+00:00

Life is too short to spend it with a GF you can't trust. Start talking to other girls and downgrade her to plate status.

FluteByTrey · 2015-03-05T03:09:28+00:00

You need to call her bluff on this one.

Tell her that you think you two need to take a break so she can spend time with him and that she can come be with you when she's about being with you.

Then watch what she does. If she agrees to this, she isn't yours anyway...let her go.

If she's truly yours, she'll choose you and leave her ex alone. You need to realize that you are worth more than dealing with a chick who still has one foot in her past relationship comfort zone.

wantonton · 2015-03-05T03:28:50+00:00

I fuck her until she squirms in orgasmic waves so there is no way she would cheat on me with him.

How does her liking dick mean she won't cheat on you?

sixtysecondmonk · 2015-03-05T01:37:09+00:00

Meh let her. If she fucks him you can kick her to the curb. That responsibility is on her not you.

UnluckyPenguin · 2015-03-05T01:53:51+00:00

Wow, all sorts of screwed up things going on here. Take a step back and look at the bigger picture, dump the girl, and start focusing on yourself.

blackout drunk

You lack self-control. Getting drunk enough to make out some random girl.

She kissed him when we were in the first month of our relationship

You lack self-respect. Accepting your girlfriend kissing her ex while she was dating you.

I think she did it as a revenge...

Haha, obviously. Any woman that uses being intimate as a weapon is one you should stay very far away from.

I don't want to be controlling but I don't really trust her either.

The moment you can't trust a girl, the relationship has ended. Keep your eyes on the prize, which probably isn't you right now, but it could be you in 10 years.

Good luck!

Title	gf wants to see ex, how do I react?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	8
Comments	19
Date	March 5, 2015 12:24 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2xytep/gf_wants_to_see_ex_how_do_i_react/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/gf-wants-to-see-ex-how-do-i-react.191755 https://theredarchive.com/post/191755

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