My girlfriend occassionally drops in the fact that she's done stuff with other guys

Red-Zen · 2015-01-15T21:56:11+00:00

we shouldn't play "Never Have I Ever" as we'd just get pissed off with each other, and she alluded to the fact that there are things that I wouldn't want to know.

Nice. She clearly doesnt respect you.
Tee Hee, I'm a bad girl and you dont like it. Too bad you're such a big pussy that you'll let me rub it in your face.

I'd agree and amplify. She's begging to be put in her place.

I don't want to break up with her as, other than this, she is probably as close to a perfect RP woman as you can get

Oneitis.

take her anal virginity,

So she claims.

I'm the only guy to make her come so hard that she's physically started shaking

So she claims.

TheReason13 · 2015-01-16T02:01:59+00:00

Its a mild shit test. She is doing it deliberately to affect you emotionally, this is the womans way of gaining control over the man, through controlling his emotions.

You shouldn't play her games, these are things that only get worse if you don't nip them in the bud.

Don't react though, ignore your emotions. Agree and amplify. Fuck her in the ass and then say, "you know I've done this before, and you're no virgin."

Dread and neg her in one blow. See how she likes her own medicine.

Stayinghereforreal · 2015-01-15T22:16:47+00:00

Gawwwwd, all the advice to go all dark and angry on her is terrrrrible advice. Ignore it.

Instead make her feel comfortable and safe telling you about her past. Listen, nod, smile and say things like, "Look at you, you naughty girl. I knew you were a wicked little kitten." Etc.

Getting the whole story will take multiple times of showing nothing but warmth and encouragement about being open with you. THEN you can put everything she ever did with anyone on the menu, and escalate beyond that.

But if you be an asshole about her past, or make her feel the least little bit uncomfortable about it, she will clam up and never say anything, and your menu items just got smaller.

fnordsnord · 2015-01-15T21:09:53+00:00

I'd be prone to give her a flat stare over my glasses and hold it until she either blushed and turned away, or asked "what?"

Then reply, "Unless you want to hear about the time I had to hide in a Turkish Hareem for three days, don't tell me about your past."

RedHeimdall · 2015-01-16T08:25:43+00:00

[she] has asked me on a couple of occasions to take her anal virginity

First of all, you need to get right on that if for some dumb reason you haven't already.

I agree with what others have said about this being shit testing that you need to nip in the bud/get a handle on sooner rather than later. If you get butthurt about it, you lose.

But at the same time, you can do what I often do with plates, which is (if the subject comes up) to say something along the lines of: "I don't want to hear anything about you and other dudes. You can do whatever the fuck you want to do, it's none of my business, and really I don't give a shit, but that doesn't mean I want to hear about it. What I don't know about can't make me jealous. I don't want to get jealous, you don't want me to get jealous, so just keep that shit on the downlow, know what I mean? On the other hand, any stories about you hooking up with other girls, feel free to lay them on me anytime."

This is all said casually with a smile and they always respond well. It does show some of the beta side, acknowledging that I am a guy who can be made jealous at times, but I've found girls like to see some beta (just definitely not too much) in their guys. Although you probably only want to consciously "show her some beta" if you're confident that her overall opinion of you is sufficiently alpha.

Now this is with plates, but you're talking about a GF... Up to you how important her past sexual shenanigans are to you. For me, with a GF as opposed to a plate, I would rather do my best to find out the truth of her past. I don't want to ignore it, because in that context it would matter to me. So as others have said, be nonjudgmental and encouraging of her spilling her guts, then decide how to proceed.

RPmatrix · 2015-01-16T12:30:14+00:00

(over Christmas she travelled pretty much half way across the country to come visit me for a few days

so, you're in an LTR with this chick huh?

oh-hi-doggy · 2015-01-15T21:01:55+00:00

Communication is key to a successful and happy relationship. Maybe you should just reiterate the fact that it hurts your feeling when she tells you about her previous sexcapades.

Not sure why I'm being downvoted, this advice is pretty fair and simply IMO.

Title	My girlfriend occassionally drops in the fact that she's done stuff with other guys
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	25
Date	January 15, 2015 8:58 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2sjzer/my_girlfriend_occassionally_drops_in_the_fact/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/my-girlfriend-occassionally-drops-in-the-fact-that.192465 https://theredarchive.com/post/192465

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