Failing at post-college bar scene

kingofpoplives · 2014-07-03T00:05:59+00:00

Make sure you look good. Dress like a doped out player, a cut above the typical guy in that scene.

Do not go out with guys who are not attractive and/or flat out suck with women. Guys with no game will kill your chances. It is better go it alone if none of your friends have game.

Test out different bars to find one that fits your particular niche and personal vibe. Since you are just out of college, you are gonna want one with a young crowd.

Go to the bar, and do your best to get a good seat or place to stand in the middle of the action. Do not get caught standing awkwardly some place. Do not eye fuck every decent girl in the place. Avoid checking them out directly. Learn to do it on the sly, out of the corner of your eye. Learn how to use your peripheral vision to see which girls are checking you out

If you look good and your body language is solid you will find that the girls who are interested in you will give obvious signs. They will find ways to position themselves within your vicinity or they will try to make eye contact with you.

Open these girls. If they are interested, the conversion/flirting to go much better. It sounds like your problems stem from these women not actually wanting to talk to you, so they don't hold up their end of the conversation, you try to carry it but it doesn't work.

Good luck out there, but it's not gonna be easy. Sorry to say it but you've moved from the top of the heap and now find yourself on the bottom. Learn game, get your life together, and in your later twenties you will be killing it again.

TenderRacingPumpkin · 2014-07-03T00:00:13+00:00

I can't help directly with any special moves but I can offer you some advice.

Maybe bars aren't your thing or perhaps you have grown out of them. For some people it just isn't their cup of tea.

Consider looking at other ways of meeting women such as volunteering, joining a club/sports team or taking some classes. Approaching and closing in these situations is just as difficult however a bar is a pretty alien environment.

If a bar IS your thing then these are also great places to practice.

And there is the important word: practice.

Juan23Four5 · 2014-07-03T01:15:21+00:00

I'm 21 and I hated the bar scene since day one. Their only useful purpose is getting drunk, and honestly you could do that better and cheaper in your home with some friends.

Clubs are even worse. Completely designed to separate you from the money in your wallet.

If you are like me, maybe bars aren't your scene. Try meeting girls in a different setting. Concert, park, coffee shop, etc.

I love to ski and go to the beach, both are great activities for meeting new people (chatting up girls on the ski lift is always a good time).

machimus · 2014-07-03T03:02:36+00:00

Be the guy that a girl would want to go home with at the end of the night. She has to be having fun, feel a personal connection, and a physical connection, and your time to establish is limited.

For meeting girls you actually think are interesting and you can be less aggressive with, have you ever considered talking to them at bookstores or coffee shops?

robesta · 2014-07-03T12:33:34+00:00

You're gonna have to adjust your game. You're in a different environment. I like RooshV's Bang. Give that a read. The key thing for one night stands is to hook the girl, escalate, feed her hamster, and don't be afraid to take the low road ("I need to use your bathroom for a minute "). Don't rely on her to push for fucking on the first night.

cascadecombo · 2014-07-03T05:47:49+00:00

so you relied entirely on your social standings, smart move.

Title	Failing at post-college bar scene
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	15
Comments	12
Date	July 2, 2014 11:43 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/29p1ia/failing_at_postcollege_bar_scene/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/failing-at-post-college-bar-scene.195062 https://theredarchive.com/post/195062

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