First of all, thank you for the tough love around here. MRP is working.

In my original post, most of you that replied that engaging, even under those circumstances, was not the correct way to handle it. I think it did end well, so no regrets. However, next time something like this goes down, I will try maintaining frame and just pick up later when she is calm.

As for how this wrapped up. She came home the next night after work and through the front door was walking on egg shells a little. Gave me a kind of monotone hello to just see where I was at. I replied with a sincere and care free, "Hey babe! How are you?" The vibe was immediately better. Once she was settled a bit, I led her to the kitchen table, asked her to sit down and talk about what had happened. I told her that I had not communicated very well the night before and wanted to try and explain things better this time. I told her that I understand the way I explained things led her to feel belittled and that was not my intention. I reiterated my stance on the MINT account and explained my reasoning for wanting to be the lead person on that. I told her that I totally agree that we both have to be involved in the budget since we both make and spend money. Moving forward we will go over everything on a weekly basis together but, to avoid headaches with our budgeting tool (MINT) I would manage that on my own. I calmly and clearly explained what was up and took the lead. She was totally receptive and calm. She was like, "Yeah, that makes sense". She then apologized for her behavior the previous night. I told her that I had not planned on bringing it up but, since she did... I thanked her for the apology and told her that, there are going to be times she's angry with me and that is totally okay but, crossing the line into breaking things, slamming doors and hurling insults is not okay. I encouraged her to let me know if she is upset, sad, angry, anything at all, at any time and if it's too much at that time, wait until you're cool enough to talk. Open door policy. I then came across the table and gave her a big embrace and 10 second kiss. She pretty much melted in my arms. After that I totally dropped it and got on with having a great night together. Probably the first time I have effectively taken the lead. I am trying to find balance and temper the DNGAF.