Original post

Today is my birthday.

Wife let me sleep in. My 3yo daughter gives me a bday card she made with wife. Had breakfast.

So its about 10am. Sitting in the lounge. My brother and his wife are coming over for lunch. He tells me he'll be there around 12:30.

Earlier in the week my wife told me that she'd like to swap the office with our daughters bedroom. I thought this was a good idea. Considering my brother was coming over and he and I already had plans to go to the hardware store for some other stuff, I figured it was a good time to swap the rooms.

As soon as I start wife is angry that today is not a good day. I asked why and she gave no coherent answer. So I did it. Halfway through she gave me a bit of a hand. I figure this was holding frame.

Then later, as I'm moving the bigass fucking desk that weighs more than me, I accidently knocked a photo off the wall. Broke the photo frame. She's at me straight away about how it's broken and why don't I listen to her. I asked her if she was going to stop being a bitch.

After I was finished I found that not all her crap from the office will fit in the other room. I told her she'd have to go through it and ill help clear out the closet for space.

She's still being a bitch about boxes and shit. I told her its not like its a big deal. We have boxes and piles of clutter everywhere. She's gets pissed about it, throws makeup and runs into the bedroom.

I messaged my brother told him what was up and not to bother coming over with his wife. I told the wife I told them not to come over, pht on my shoes and left.

I was angry and just wanted to go.

I was walking down the street. She's screaming at me from the front door that I cant leave. She ran after me with socks on, its been raining, with the 3 year old under her arm about how bad I am. How can I do this to her. She was trying to make a special day for me and how could I do this.

I said I was leaving so that I don't get angry and will be back later.

She said not to bother coming back and I walked away.

What do I even do now? Go back tonight? Go sooner (I'm sort of hungry and she was cooking a chicken)?

Did I fuck up here by thinking she could be a little appreciative that I just swapped all the furniture and cleaning two rooms in 2 hours. She wanted it done. I got it done. Wtf?

Now update:

I went home after a couple hours. Went and had a coffee and one of those gay little cakes from a cafe (lemon meringue, my favourite).

When I got home, I saw the cooked chicken and potatoes. Asked her if they'd eaten yet (daughter and her). She said no, so I started serving it up. They came and ate with me.

I hugged her and said I'm sorry if she thought the day was ruined. And then I explained to her that I was angry because a "thankyou" would've been nice. She said she was angry because I called her a bitch, I replied, calmly, that I didn't call her a bitch, I asked her if she would stop acting like a bitch (the difference is lost on her).

And that was that. She'd fixed up her office crap when I was gone. No mention of any of the other hysterical shit she was calling. I did make fun of her about running after me in socks with a screaming kid in the mud, oh what the neighbours must think.

Anyway, what I'm looking for:

did I handle this well. I think I did alright, but pretty sure I fucked up the return. I was the one who initiated the apologies. I don't think I did anything wrong, but she's as stubborn as a fucking rock. I knew if I didn't say anything, this would last a week. should I have refrained from interacting with her to the point where she got super pissed? (she was complaining about the clutter and I commented that she has clutter everywhere anyway, so its not like anyone would tell the difference. I think this upset her because in her mind she'd been reducing the clutter) *should I have just stayed out all day and came back later in the night?