Within the past three to four days, Ive been browsing RP material and started reading NMMNG. I am a total newbie and I know I must be BP. Something resonated with me, I am unhappy with my life as it is and I simply want to just better myself and start doing what I desire to do without worrying about what other people think. Ive been in an LTR for over 4 years and things on the surface have been good but I feel like I am always responsible for keeping my LTR happy and occupied, and if she's bored, its somehow my fault.

Ive been working out a lot lately and have been consciously putting my wants first, but I am not sure if I have crossed the line into a selfish asshole who doesnt give a shit about my LTR.

For example, today I came home from work a little after 5, my LTR was on the couch, she works very close to home so is usually home first. I try to initiate conversation but its overall nothing. She is normally friendlier and outgoing, not sure what's going on. The TV is on and we're just sitting there. I say its really nice out, we should go outside. She asks if i'm going out for a run. I sort of had the idea in the back of my head because sitting on the couch watching TV with no conversation is super boring. I say yes, and invite her to join me. She says no, she cant really keep up. I say ill do a light jog. She gets kind of snippy and says she doesnt want to exercise today. Keep in mind I am using friendly, playful tone, and she sounds more irritated.

I go for a run. Come back shes not there and her bike is gone. I take a shower. She comes back and i ask how her bike ride was. She says she picked up something she left at the office since she had nothing better to do. I dont respond.

I get a text from a friend inviting both of us to a local beer garden nearby and i ask her if she wants to go. She gives a very unenthusiastic "i dont care." I say it will be fun and we should go, but should eat dinner first. She says its too early for dinner. I say well then we can have a beer or two and then some food while were out. She says she needs time to shower and do her hair. I say well we can just meet them there later. She says why dont you just go alone? I say ok. She takes a shower and i ask her when she gets out if she still doesnt wanna go. She says she has to do laundry...

So i leave. As I am leaving, I looked back and said give me a text if you change your mind and i notice her eyes are runny and she is really upset.

I just left anyway. I had a good time but i felt kind of bad leaving her crying, but wtf was i supposed to do? Sit in boredom on the couch watching tv all night??? She is usually very social too, i have no idea what is going on. Anyway I'm home now and she didnt say a word to me and went to bed and closed the door.

Is this a big shit test or did I cross her line by going out without her? I have a feeling she is going to try to blow this up on me, saying I dont give a shit about her, she is not my priority, etc etc. Did i fuck up by not comforting her when she cried?

How would you guys respond to this? Do I say its unfair for you to expect me to be your sole source of entertainment? Do I say we both could have used some air and time apart? Do I just say nothing??