No Kidding: My 30 Dating Dealbreakers Mean I'll Be Single Forever. Oh CafeMom, the hypocrisy!

itsmehobnob · 2013-04-25T18:31:02+00:00

Yes, I'm willing to date a bald, short, lower middle class dude with a small package -- as long as he doesn't do any of the above. Doesn't that count for something?!

No you wouldn't, and no it doesn't

Sarcasticus · 2013-04-25T18:56:02+00:00

My comment:

I don't know if it's your list of 'must-haves' that will keep you single or your abhorrent personality. Why do you think any man meeting all these qualities would settle for you? Try looking at what you bring to the table first.

Amazingly, it's been accepted by the moderator. I doubt it'll last...

Bobsutan · 2013-04-25T20:54:20+00:00

flip genders in only something like 8 percent women in America would be dateable

slmns · 2013-04-25T19:13:26+00:00

1.) He stares at his cellphone screen while we're together.

Bitch, maybe you should be deeper than some shit you read in cosmo this week. Maybe he wants some engaging conversation.

"Wow, this conversation that we are having about economics and politics over old fashoned's and martini's is really boring, let me check my phone" SAID NO MAN EVER.

2.) He drinks too much. I can't define "too much" but I'll know it when I see it.

I feel the same way about girls who shop too much. What? You dont like when people make value judgements about your habits without clearly defining a limit?

3.) He smokes.

How petty.

4.) He doesn't exercise -- ever.

Hold him to the same standard that you live to. How often do we see you in the gym?

5.) He's really into watching sports -- especially anything having to do with wrestling, football, or race car driving.

You're right. Lets just go out with our male friends who think youre a total controlling bitch instead of staying at home where you know where the fuck we are and what we are doing.

6.) He likes to stay out late. A lot.

Nope, guess we cant do that either. What the fuck are we supposed to do with ourselves then?

7.) He can't hold down a job.

Okay. Unless youre on the workplace grind too, shut up.

Note: men who cant keep a job arent really liked by other men either.

8.) He's a trust fund baby who has never had to have a job.

So hes rich, is still with your turbobitch self, and you still complain?

9.) He's got money issues, is always broke, or in major debt. He gambles.

Fine. Unless you have a credit score of >735, i dont wanna hear shit about being broke, major debt, or any form of addiction that costs money.

10.) He smokes pot or does any kind of drug.

So, between this, the smoking, and the undefined drinking limit, you just eliminated every male over 21 who isnt a mormon. Enjoy Utah you silly bitch.

11.) He has a history of cheating.

Fine. No sarcasm there. You better be a fucking saint as well then.

12.) He is SO gone after he lies to me for the second time. He'll get ONE warning.

Two lie limit? Can we apply those rules to women? (Hint: no, but we should start). If we did, every woman would be on r/foreveralonewomen.

13.) He watches a lot of porn.

So, he cant go get laid, your masterlock cunt probably wont let him in until he meets some stupid and arbitrary goal (no sex until you give me white roses in the rain tee hee) and now you deny him his only reprieve?

Worse than Hitler.

14.) He's shady about introducing me to his friends or family.

Because he is ashamed of you.

15.) He's wishy-washy on commitment.

Same as 14.

Edit: same as 1-14

16.) He has to run decisions by his mom.

Fuck any man for going to the one woman who cares about him without asking anything in return, right? In fact, i dare a woman to tell me to not ask my mother for advice. I will drop her like a sack of hot dog shit in a Mississippi summer.

She should be grateful that he knows how to have a loving and respectful relationship with a woman that has zero sex involved - it lets her know that when they get married and she stops fucking that he wont kill/rape/divorce her.

17.) He hates his job and complains about it all the time.

Bitch, its called a job not a i get paid to do fun things like fly kites and fingerblast sorority girls. Didnt you just fucking complain about broke dudes? Yes. Yes you did. Unlike you, i can count from 7 to 17 without forgetting shit.

18.) He loves his job and is dedicated to it 24/7.

Bitch, its called a job not a i get paid to do fun things like fly kites and fingerblast sorority girls. Didnt you just fucking complain about broke dudes? Yes. Yes you did. Unlike you, i can count from 7 to 17 without forgetting shit.

Why did i just copy paste that? Because female memory is clearly fucking so short, that beteen 17 and 18, she forgot this shit.

19.) He broke up with a serious girlfriend within the past three months.

Yeah, fuck him for wanting to get back out there and on with his life instead of pining after someone who never cared about him. Maybe he's mature enough to realize that not every relationship will end with marriage.

20.) He seems even the tiniest bit gay.

Oh, i didnt know you could "seem gay". Tell me, what does "seeming gay" aside from him literally saying "yes, im gay" look/sound/smell/taste/feel like?

Cant answer that without sounding like a bigot? It's because you ARE a bigot.

21.) He's got anger issues.

So what. Does he properly vent those issues? If so, shut up. We dont say "Yeah, shes a nice lady and treats me well, but shes got self image issues that she has completely under control so i cant date her."

If he isnt breaking things or people, you have no problem.

22.) He's obsessed with status and money and cares about things like bottle service, brand names, and who was seen with whom.

"Hes obsessed with having the best, being the best, and surrounding himself with like-minded people."

Fixed that for you.

23.) He stares hungrily at other women while we're together.

Imagine my response to #1 and #13 had sex (women stopped caring at this point). That glorious bitter bastard would be the response I would give here.

24.) He lives more than an hour away.

Youre too lazy to drive for love. Guess you dont want/need/deserve it then. Bet you wouldnt have a single fucking issue if he was the one driving all the time.

25.) He doesn't get my jokes.

He gets them, you just aren't funny.

26.) He watches crappy TV.

No, you watch crap TV (which is why youre unfunny...and alone).

27.) He's racist or homophobic or misogynist.

Says the homophobe who thinks people can "seem gay".

28.) He's over 30 and still trying to "find" himself.

Many people dont find their calling until later in life. Odds are that hes talented at a lot of things. He could be a hippie though.

Its a toss-up.

29.) He's allergic to animals.

What the fuck? You cant even control that! You might as well say:

"29.) If hes black."

He's got depression or other mental health issues.

That's actually worse than 28! Did you know that 25% of Americans have some mental health issue? Obviously not because you have this preconcieved notion of what a mental health issue is. What a cunt.

Enjoy being alone forever.

2013-04-26T04:11:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

30303030303030 · 2013-04-25T22:59:48+00:00

good luck to her ;)

enjoy your cats

The_Man_Radan · 2013-04-25T23:58:13+00:00

Damn, according to that woman, I was out at #5. I don't even have that high of a standard to be that fucking stringent.

Stopher · 2013-04-26T04:59:11+00:00

The whole job requirements are pretty picky. He has to have a job that he loves but doesn't spend too much time doing and never complains about or works too hard at but still be super successful so he isn't broke. There's only one job i know like that and Pat Sajack is never gonna quit.

slmns · 2013-04-25T19:14:59+00:00

damn it woman, a relationship isn't about finding the perfect person, it's more about finding someone you are physically attracted to and with whom you get along well to build something worthwhile together.

GrlsRCyoot · 2013-04-26T20:40:07+00:00

A hamster's gonna hamst.

r_rships_account · 2013-04-29T08:31:57+00:00

He can't hold down a job.

He's a trust fund baby who has never had to have a job.

He's got money issues, is always broke, or in major debt. He gambles.

He hates his job and complains about it all the time.

He loves his job and is dedicated to it 24/7.

Seems like a lot of her dealbreakers are about money. This sample above basically excludes everyone - the rich, the poor, the lazy and the ambitious alike.

Deldar · 2013-04-26T00:18:29+00:00

Who fucking cares?

Title	No Kidding: My 30 Dating Dealbreakers Mean I'll Be Single Forever. Oh CafeMom, the hypocrisy!
Author	RedditBlueit
Upvotes	31
Comments	28
Date	April 25, 2013 5:39 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/1d3gar/no_kidding_my_30_dating_dealbreakers_mean_ill_be/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/no-kidding-my-30-dating-dealbreakers-mean-ill-be.234785 https://theredarchive.com/post/234785

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