Patience gets it faster.

I want to talk about patience and impatience.

We often talk about abundance and neediness. This is extremely relevant but the issue can be examined under a different light. Wether you're needy or not depends on the current state of your life. If you're needy, chances are you're gonne have to put in some work before you're abundant regarding whatever it is you need. You can't just snap your fingers. Let's say you need regular access to feminine intimacy. You're needy. You need it. The term needy refers to the objective need that inhabits you at that particular moment.

It is hard to fake abundance. That's why "don't be needy" isn't great advice. The dude needs something, he needs access to at least one woman's intimacy in his life. He's needy.

I know women should never stay the focus of your attention, but it is far more convenient to maintain a decent sex life if you want to focus on a higher purpose. Spinning plates is the right way for this. However, you don't necessarily want to do it as long as possible without MGTOW or LTR breaks in between.

Let's say you don't correctly spin plates yet. They break too soon for example.

If you're in need, you're needy. There's nothing you can do to get abundance now. You can only take action to change the future. In our case: approach. But do so patiently, without any hurry. Your mindset when you approach the girl should be "Well, I have time, for her or another like her. There's no need to rush."

Neediness/abundance is the basic, concrete dimension of your personal state towards the goal. It's out of your control right now. Patience/impatience is on another level. You don't have control on what you need but you have control over your attitude, wether you truly need it or not. You can be needy yet patient. You can also be abundant yet impatient.

Women feel your neediness. I don't explain it clearly but I think it's actually no joke. However, if a woman sees it but you're patient, that means you control your needs, and they don't control you. And that is actually quite impressive to a woman, if you don't let your neediness show without control.

Here is the trick : your neediness will transpire anyway. Since she will inevitably sense some of it when you approach or during a date, you should chose how you show it, and do so as rarely as possible. It should be through tiny, highly concentrated bursts of subtle yet vibrant sexualit. A gesture, a phrase, a look. However, it should be toned down with a patient and relaxed behaviour in the following seconds. You just open the gate a tiny bit, overconfidently but for a short time. That way you let the energy out for a moment, and at the end of the approach/date, everything she saw from your actual neediness are these controled, amused, mastered hints of sex.

If you don't do this, you won't know how to properly contain your energy and it will awkwardly show. Girls are very good at noticing these things. You can be too though, but it's more work for us guys. It actually means we can learn something from women. In this regard, you should read The Essential Difference by Simon Baron Cohen.

Stop oppressing women. Yes, unironically. Women don't feel oppressed by men who hit on them, they only hate the impatient ones. Attractiveness counts, but we know women are less quick to judge simply based on looks than men, at least the older ones. The ones who complain the most. If you want more information about this, check the second volume of The Rational Male, Preventive Medicine by Rollo Tomassi.

Think about the feminist cliché of the male abuser, wether he catcalls in the street, pinches a girl's butt in a club or rape an innocent woman. Men do some stupid shit when they act solely on their own desire, impatiently. They're maybe not more needy than you are, but they're fucking impatient to get what they want. They're impatient. Don't be these filthy losers. Be smart and patient.

Nowadays everything goes lightning fast. Computers, phones, everything speeds up continually. We can get everything we want by tapping a few times on a glass. The most powerful impatient filth is porn.

When you talk to a girl, she will probably see you're in need of sex anyway, if that's the case. That's good. She sould know you like sex. She can tease you with it, and that's what you want. If she sees absolutely no desire from you, she won't be sexual either.

Don't worry, she will see it. How she will react depends on you. You can show some interest but you have to handle it well. You're a man, you need sex, there's nothing wrong with that. If you're on a date with a beautiful girl, you will feel that need stronger than ever, especially if you haven't fucked or jacked off in a while.

It's ok for you to display some of that energy, but do it in the most controled manner you can, and always make her understand that you are very patient. You don't have to fuck her tonight or even next time. Maybe you'll fuck her in two months, and thats no big deal because you'll approach a shitton of new girls in the meantime and have plenty of opportunities, many of which you'll blow up by being a stupid moron, but a few of which will get you to bed with a pretty girl who's into you.

Some dude come back from date and post something like "I was next to her but I didn't do a single move". That's not patience, that's hardcore overthinking over one's neediness, being impatient yet paralyzed by the idea of overtly showing your inned sexual need. She saw how lustful and stressed you were at that moment, and the fact you wanted to fuck her is not what disgusted her, it's how you weirdly tried to hide it from her, cockblocking yourself like a professional.

When texting a girl, be patient for god's sake. I have a theory : if you want to fuck a girl on a regular basis, you should be her slowest contact to respond. You obviously have to adjust to her response time. Some girl almost always text right away, some almost always wait a day, and everything in between. It gives you an indication about here average contact response time. You can also try to hear her phone when you're with her.

Let's say you meet a girl and just get her number, waiting a week to contact her is a bare minimum. 15 minutes should be the absolute minimum for any text, except extremely occasional and short chats. This is also true for the words you speak on a date. The girl will probably get that you're obviously taking too long to answer by text or in person. But there'll still be a doubt about wether you really are busy or thinking hard about your anwer. In any case, it show you're not in a rush. It shows you're a patient dude, and women love that. Stop trying to get laid tonight. Start trying to get laid next month.

Don't try to fake abundance, it will not work. Women prefer men who actually have abundance, that's true, but there is nothing more ridiculous than a needy man who fakes abundance so he can finally get some ass. If you want to fake abundance, you should have an history of abundance, and even then, I'm not sure it's really possible. If you're in your driest spell after a juicy handful of pussy-filled months, your inner neediness will show 100%. In fact, it may even be worst than for a simple virgin or a beginner. Sex is indeed quite addictive and it's always hard when you're forced to slow down.

I think the idea of female solipsism is mostly true, however I believe they still feel on some level that it's hard for a dude who never get laid. They just don't care. A dude who doesn't try is invisible to them, not even worthy of pity, but a patient guy who still puts energy into it may be worth some of their time, dependings on how he puts it. A patient guys who has abundance will radiate something that will draw women to them.

An impatient dude, needy or not, and unless extremely attractive, will often bother her more than anything. Harrassement is actually a thing. It's what impatient men do, the who can't or dont want to read feminine lust signals. They constantly escalate without decoding first. They don't think. It's instinctive, purely animal and stupid. They rely simply on their own desires. They're as solipsistic as most women are.

If you're patient, that means you at least have something else going on, something interesting you save your energy for. If your sexual energy leaks from everywhere, it doesn't only means you're needy in term of sex, it means you have nothing better to do that awkwardly try to push women to have sex with you, the fastest as possible. If you already spin plates, a girl will rightfully think that your extreme patience towards her is motivated by your sexual abundance, but it can be something else too.

What does it mean, to be patient ? Being patient is not something you do. It's not a start. It's a stop, something you stop doing. Patience is less action. When faced with something you know will come but doesn't know when or know it's in a long time, you can get agitated and try to move things quicker. In every situation this happens, it's a bad idea. If calm down and move on to something else instead of impatently waiting, things will be far easier for you.

In the case of women, it will draw them to you. In the eyes of women, there are two types of guys : the patient ones, and the impatient ones. The fact of you actually be needy or not is irrelevant to them. Remember this : Women don't care about your needs. In the end they just don't. But hey, do you truly care about her needs? Only you have the answer.

The extreme irony of this is that someone impatient often will never get what he was impatient for, especially with women. A patient dude knows he will get laid. He takes his time and will be seen as way more confident and safe for a woman to sleep and maybe even have a relationship with.

You think you're quite distant already? You're getting results but not the best you could or they never last further than one night stands? You just feel irritated abour your life in general? You never seem to reach your goals?

Here's an answer in the form of a haiku:

do nothing at all — do it better, do it more. stop trying to do

In understand the problematic nature of this concept, but I realized the red pill as actually built on this. It's very ancient. It may be the secret of life itself, but it may also be the hardest thing to explain with words. Zen is an attempt.

I recommend reading buddhist (koans are fun) and stoic stuff. Since I alweays hear the same classic names for stoic books here's a small one, almost tactical : Epictetus Manual, or Enkheiridion. Compact, concise, no bullshit.

If you want to start any good habit or leave behind a bad one, patience is key, not motivation. Motivation is like a boost, a launching rocket. You need patience because results don't always come fast. Take lifting for example, or any skill really.

Once you become patient, you'll notice things happen faster. You'll enjoy them instead of rushing through because you don't want to fully experience the slow fluctuations, the procedural molding that's taking place into yourself while you repeat, patiently, the same thing over and over again.

Reading a book requires patience. You should do it everyday.

Meditation, regardless of what genuine power you wanna attribute to it, at least teaches you patience. There's no need for any technique to learn patience. Buy a stupid hourglass, put a timer on your phone or whatever you want, sit on the ground, put it on fifteen minutes and don't move until the end.

TL;DR : Be patient.