How can I build more friendships with women? (19F)

teaandtalk · 2019-07-14T06:29:23+00:00

I just never cared about the trivial things like obsessing over your looks or talking about a guy and not doing anything,

I don't exactly have the most girl-friendly interests. (Right-wing politics, metal/rap music, microbial testing, nature + boating, etc

First things first: stop judging women as superficial/trivial if they don't share your interests, and also stop assuming that your interests aren't shared by other women. Didn't white women vote overwhelmingly for trump in the last election? You come off as judgy and 'not like other girls', so perhaps you should work on that. And try going to some right-wing political events, or joining a hiking group.

NotGenie · 2019-07-14T06:51:26+00:00

You don’t have to have everything in common with the other girls. Middle ground is important to create a bond, but remember, you’re never going to find someone you agree with in every single matter. So don’t look for common ground in every aspect.

So what if they’re into partying? So what if their lifestyle is different from yours? You can still maintain friendships. You don’t need to be a party girl to be friends with one. I’m a natural extrovert but I’ve got a lot of friends who are very introverted. Friendship is built on mutual respect.

Many of my friends are hardcore leftists & we disagree on a plethora of topics. My opinion is usually the unpopular one. Disagreement is healthy. Find topics that interest you both. Conversations will be easier that way.

I don’t want to sound mean but it sounds like you’re very nit-picky about your friends. You seem to have a problem with all their interests. Ask yourself what went wrong in those friendships & what could’ve been done better. In the red pill world, we hold ourselves accountable. You’re the common denominator in all those friendships. Surely everyone else isn’t at fault here. I’m not saying that you should blame yourself because a lot of the times, broken friendships aren’t anyone’s fault.

You’ve outlined all of their “faults” but you haven’t outlined yours. Maybe there was some resentment or animosity on your behalf? Maybe you didn’t reach out enough? Maybe you need to work on your listening skills & not brush them off just because they want to talk about boys but you’re not interested? You need to figure out what went wrong from both sides so that you can avoid such situations in the future. Just remember that some friendships just aren’t meant to be. Have you considered rekindling some of your past friendships?

What are YOU interested in? Is it art, music, photography, makeup? Suppose you’re into photography. You could join a local photography club, photography Facebook groups & connect with photographers on Instagram. After you’ve established a friendship online, you could meet up & go take pictures together. Something like that. Try doing activities you enjoy & you’ll find others who enjoy the same activity. Then you’ll have common ground to build a friendship upon. Just go out there & I promise you’ll find like-minded women who will make great friends.

Personally, I took up a few “traditional” hobbies & went to classes for them. I’ve made so many friends through my knitting & cooking classes & also my reading club.

Your location is also a significant factor. If you’re in an ultra-liberal area, there’s a lesser chance of you finding women with similar values. Try visiting more conservative areas where you’ll find traditional women.

If I came off as rude, I apologize. It wasn’t my intention. I tried to give my best advice based on the information you provided. Hopefully it helps ❤️

squareone12 · 2019-07-14T10:22:45+00:00

You sound awesome! I'll be your friend.

justpostingunpopular · 2019-07-14T14:20:24+00:00

Not sure if this is red pill, but from my perspective it seems that this mindset enforces the agreeableness within the feminine nature. Notice how many women are able to maintain many friendships (no matter how superficial). Within this sub, it is about getting over differences and then accommodating them. I encourage you to learn how to talk and interact other women, and even if you feel uncomfortable and don't like it, you will find yourself surrounded my more women. You may make a few mistakes at first, but after a while you will ge the hang of it.

noreallyimsick · 2019-07-14T04:40:27+00:00

i’m in the same boat as you! volunteer, join nature walking groups, church groups, and book clubs.

Mazza78 · 2019-07-14T13:23:10+00:00

You might want to be less judgemental of others and that'll help you to make friends or acquaintances whichever you prefer in the first instance and if the relationship progresses you've befriend someone and if not you move on to another. I understand it's not easy in your teens to early adulthood to formulate friendships as you are learning about people and character traits but it helps to set aside preconceived judgements about others. It might also be useful not to engage in any line of conversation you're not happy with, another learning curve being able to stop the buck where you want rather than engage and judge another on their character trait. Wishing you well with you quest to make more friends :)

justpostingunpopular · 2019-07-14T14:20:24+00:00

Not sure if this is red pill, but from my perspective it seems that this mindset enforces the agreeableness within the feminine nature. Notice how many women are able to maintain many friendships (no matter how superficial). Within this sub, it is about getting over differences and then accommodating them. I encourage you to learn how to talk and interact other women, and even if you feel uncomfortable and don't like it, you will find yourself surrounded my more women. You may make a few mistakes at first, but after a while you will ge the hang of it.

[deleted] · 2019-07-14T15:11:01+00:00

I want more friends!!

NoctaeBride · 2019-07-14T16:04:29+00:00

This is more about other comments who are saying you're acting like high and mighty, but there's a huge difference between finding a thing trivial vs. finding the person who values those things trivial and it's clear to me that you feel the former. But you know what, it's okay to even think the latter. Women are human too and we're allowed to hold judgements, we can't help that. All my life I've been told I'm 'too judgmental' and 'too harsh/stuck-up' when I've seen men who have held the same thoughts get applauded for being righteous, though, so I may be self-projecting a little bit. In the end, YMMV and I respect everyone's opinion on here, sorry I'm not responding directly to those as there were multiple comments sharing the same sentiment and I didn't want to clog up the comments section.

So, as someone who's 7 to 3 in terms of 'male interests' to 'female interests', my female friends are mostly girls who at least share my sense of humor, and are open-minded. I have two good female friends and around five good male friends counting my boyfriend. What I've found is as long as they 1) share my sense of humor and 2) are open-minded I can get along regardless of gender. The first one is really important, and it's a lot easier than the others because sense of humor is more about our disposition than our interests. The second one is more well it's hard for me to be friends with women or men who find me weird or 'not womanly enough' because I'm into things like transformers and gunpla.

As long as the person has a passing interest in most things I am completely sure that most of the things you've stated have facts interesting about them that you can share with anybody and they'd be interested. It's all about how you present your interests. My advice is try to word them like the title of a clickbait article, haha!

AnarchoNAP · 2019-07-14T19:53:29+00:00

I'm 32 and I have the same problem. It seems my choices are left leaning feminists who aren't into much intellectual or guys. I spent the last week actively looking for whether the demographic I want even exists in real life. I'm about to give up really. That's not great advise, but intelligent non-lefistist women might only exist on the internet.

KaramLevi · 2019-07-14T05:02:26+00:00

I’m a guy and like love respect your post. You may be best suited to kids n hubby as friends and prolly have a couple daughters n son and be super loved n connected...

Out side of that, and I do think valuable n important. Is find a more feminine red pill clover on YouTube...

Also, a few books on socializing that are right wing style or family style would be helpful n support you.

Lastly I taught a ex gf how to have girl friends... it’s kinda sad, not her but USA style of women connecting...

I told her to walk up to a girl in a party setting and after seeing each other n making eyes or polite smiles... tell her she is pretty and flirt with her... look her up n down n say wow! What a great dress...

She did it n it worked. She got numbers. Very easy... deeper bonding take more skilled effort... read a book. I need one too.

Anyways she said I don’t want to look gay! I said I know!!!! But that how girls connect in USA now...

Title	How can I build more friendships with women? (19F)
Author	Lakeshore9999
Upvotes	18
Comments	18
Date	July 14, 2019 3:59 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/ccyo0g/how_can_i_build_more_friendships_with_women_19f/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/how-can-i-build-more-friendships-with-women-19f.245410 https://theredarchive.com/post/245410

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