what a great message to send

Are you a sub average woman or man who might as well be? Do you often like or post articles to social media about society's warped standards of beauty, loving your 'curves' and disliking men who are attracted to younger, thinner more beautiful women? Are you looking for a gym that will be a safe haven for your delusions, attacking the very ideal of beauty you showed up to look like?

Well then Planet Fitness is for you. We at planet fitness were going nowhere fast but we decided a few years ago that there was a way to get there faster. Thats why when deciding how to rebrand ourself, we chose to market to the lowest common denominator of the market. The whiney, pudgy, unmotivated, limp-wristed commoners of society.

You see, we at planet fitness recognize that there are a whole lot of subaverage to average people out there with disposable income. These people don't know it, but they just want to check a box on their to-do list under 'workout.' This way they can feel better about themselves when they walk by a mirror and reality knocks at the door. \"no no no mr reality, I'm working out.\"

Don't worry we're not like other gyms with actual workouts that will make you stronger. We have no dead lifts and are working to eliminate free weights all together. We have no \"lunks\" and no \"gymtimidation,\" because seeing the ideal male or female in the same building as you can pull you out of the delusions you lull yourself into believing every time you come out of the shower and see that truly unmagnificent body. So join us and tear down those who actually look good; the body you would \"kill for.\" Sure you'll never get anywhere physically speaking, but you also won't ever feel bad about yourself in our gym and that's what's important.

Oh and its only $10 a month so when you stop coming because of the results you're not seeing because of the work you're not doing, you can still continue to pay. Because if you cancel your membership, you can't lie to yourself that you're still going to go later today. And everyday this week for that matter. Welcome to the family!