How to Settle Disagreements with Pastor

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November 27, 2019
5 upvotes

Hello brothers, I recently found the RPChristian community and I am absolutely stoked about it! Upon discovering TRP about a year back, I felt overwhelmed trying to determine entirely on my own how my faith fits together with Red Pill Principles. What a gift it is to follow Jesus with you all!

Back in September, I started a Men's Small Group for fellow students at my church (a University Parish at a secular school), with the goal of having very informal weekly discussions (1-2 question prompts for 1.5 hours of discussion time) where we could really analyze & talk about ideas, and I could help steer the conversations towards various RP Christian Topics. The group was going amazingly well and had actually grown to about 12 guys, when the pastor called me into his office to say that he was shutting us down. He had given me a warning before, and essentially his reasoning was that since this was an official church function (taking place in the church building and all), church staff had to review and approve of all topics that would be discussed. He routinely expressed concern or disapproval about some topics I wanted to bring up when I briefed him on them (e.g. church teaching on gender differences, homosexuality, or pornography). I think he's worried that conversations about these 'deep' issues will somehow scare curious newcomers away from the church.

My question is where should I go from here? I've talked with my pastor at length about it, and the decision seems final. There's not much I can do about it regardless, since I'm just a student volunteer. I have continued to hold the weekly meetings at my apartment the last few weeks, but attendance has already dwindled down to 3 or 4 core guys. Should I try to keep holding the meetings and/or recruit more guys at the parish, and risk forming further tensions with the staff? Or should I just call it quits on this and try to serve/minister in other ways? I graduate in May, so I'm going to be moving to a different parish soon anyways.


Post Information
Title How to Settle Disagreements with Pastor
Author gettinjuiced147
Upvotes 5
Comments 6
Date 27 November 2019 07:33 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit askRPC
Link https://theredarchive.com/post/304599
Original Link https://old.reddit.com/r/askRPC/comments/e2cli3/how_to_settle_disagreements_with_pastor/
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Comments

[–]redwall925 points6 points  (0 children) | Copy

IMO ~5 guys is better for sharing/digesting information than 12. Sounds to me like you've fixed your problem already. Host at your place or at a local pub.

[–]1RPC6 points7 points  (0 children) | Copy

First, good for you for taking the initiative! We need more of that, especially on campuses.

The pastor sounds weak, but it is his church. I'd put all your energy into doing the offline group and run out the clock until you move and find a church that supports things like that. No need to waste more time with that pastor.

Hopefully the pastor will wake up and realize that offering goat food just brings in more goats and makes the sheep want to leave.

[–]rocknrollchuck2 points3 points  (2 children) | Copy

I started a Men's Small Group for fellow students at my church (a University Parish at a secular school)

And here's the problem. It doesn't sound like he's shared his reasoning with you other than to say he disapproves, so chances are that he's worried about the school kicking the church off campus, especially if you're discussing gender differences and homosexuality.

I have continued to hold the weekly meetings at my apartment the last few weeks, but attendance has already dwindled down to 3 or 4 core guys.

I would rather have 3 or 4 guys who are genuinely interested enough to meet at my place rather than a group that comes to the church because it's convenient. Even Jesus only had 12 disciples. Focus on these guys and continue doing your group at your apartment.

Should I try to keep holding the meetings and/or recruit more guys at the parish, and risk forming further tensions with the staff? Or should I just call it quits on this and try to serve/minister in other ways?

I would not try and push things at the parish, you will end up getting pushed completely out. Although if they are unwilling to take a stand on important issues and are more worried about their standing at the school, then that tells you all you need to know about them. Whether you stay there or not is up to you, but I personally would look for a church that is not afraid to stand on what the Word says.

[–]Praexology0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Heres a q for you then,is it worthbeing open with those in or near the parish about how weak the staffs spiritual focus is? I personally believe moread pastors need to he 'called out'. But I'd be curious to your thoughts

[–]rocknrollchuck0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

No it's not usually worth it. He's discussed it with the pastor and said:

He routinely expressed concern or disapproval about some topics I wanted to bring up when I briefed him on them (e.g. church teaching on gender differences, homosexuality, or pornography).

Calling pastors out when they are not willing to preach the whole counsel of God is a waste of time. He's already made his decision and will have to answer to God on Judgment Day. Best to just find a church with a pastor who is serious about the Word.

[–]Rifleshoot0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Continue having them somewhere else rather than the church. The church is under the care of the pastor, so it’s ultimately his decision whether it’s right or wrong. However, if you feel that what you are doing is right, simply moving locations is a minor inconvenience at most.



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