Strong, independent woman requires her suitors to compete in a dick-measuring contest before giving her commitment.

Cream1984 · 2019-08-05T18:30:50+00:00

33 years old and still hasn’t learned that men don’t want to date a masculine he she.

anyoneinamerica · 2019-08-05T18:05:48+00:00

She needs to take her metaphorical dick and find a mythical woman.

I wouldn't fuck that with someone else's dick.

harharry · 2019-08-05T19:13:51+00:00

I’m not gay and neither are most guys who are looking for women on tinder.

Lady, you gotta realize that men who are not gay do not want to date other men.

TerpsMakeMeDrink · 2019-08-05T19:20:59+00:00

You posted not one good picture of yourself. Your face is partially obscured in one, and I can't tell shit about your face in the blurry-as-fuck motion shots you posted, so I will go ahead and assume you're at best a 5/10, and that's because you don't appear to be fat.

In my experience, females with this "I-don't-take-no-shit", independent (but also one of the guys) vibe have been absolutely savaged by countless dudes. I recommend that shes save that ice auger because it may be the only stimulus that can bring her to climax at this point.

Falln2pieces · 2019-08-05T18:07:48+00:00

I dated a girl with this exact attitude when we met. Within a week, I found out she was severely bipolar, would start fights with her kids when she was bored, called me "boi" all the time because I "wasn't a man to her".

She loved complaining about the gifts I got her nott being good enough. My favorite part is she tried to use sex as some kind of prize for me being nice to her. The moment I had a new place to live was the last time I every talked to her.

Oh, she also cried for hours the 2 times I turned her down for sex when I was exhausted from working 12 hour shifts while she sat home all day crocheting blankets. It was a fun year. I needed a place to live for a bit. Lol

Typo-MAGAshiv · 2019-08-05T19:44:23+00:00

Summarized translation: "I'm a raging cunt who goes out of her way to be bitchy because I think it's cool. I wish I had been born a man, so I act like the chads who have pumped and dumped me."

peguy2000 · 2019-08-05T18:04:34+00:00

100% shes gonna make a reddit post about where are all the good men

apekingorange · 2019-08-05T19:22:15+00:00

Wow, she wanted to have a dick so much, she became one.

Traksimuss · 2019-08-05T18:59:23+00:00

Sassy bitch who will criticize anything you do, and demand "equality" meaning she gets to decide what it means.

Pass, she should look for soyboyest dude she can tolerate, and then she can command him all day.

DeeplyDisturbed1 · 2019-08-06T02:00:04+00:00

Dear Jasonette Statham,

I just checked out your profile, and, well...it is pretty interesting.

Before I say anything, I would like you to tell me what you are looking for.

Looking for a man...not a man child.

Okay. A man child is still a child. Good to know you are not seeking pedo action here. That would not fly here - or anywhere.

Be more specific.

An equal partner

Ok. First, kick my ass in a kickboxing, Karate, Judo, Aikido, Boxing, or other hand to hand combat sport and we can take it from there. After all, you must prove that you are "equal" to me too, no?

What other whackadoodle shit do you have to share with us?

If my metaphorical dick...

Ok. Stop right there.

I know you think this dog whistle is going to bring out the Alpha males. But it is not. Strong men seek out soft feminine women - generally speaking. You are going down the wrong path here Jay Jay.

Please. Continue...

is bigger than yours, it's not going to work.

What? Your dick or the relationship?

Big fan of banter

Who the fuck declared it the month of banter. This is the third time I have seen this term.

I do not want to banter with you. I want to fuck you. If you are not down for that, call up your gay BFF and "banter" with him.

Anything else?

33

Okay Jay Stay. We need to have some real talk here.

You are are an ugly post wall woman pretending to me a man. You are doing "man" things, and you are taking photos to prove how big your dick is. You do not have a dick. You never will. And you will never, and can never be a man.

Good men, real men, decent men- they just DO things. They do not seek attention or upvotes, or approval, or women. They just DO shit and get it done.

My diagnosis is that you had a weak father. Your Dad got his Minnesota ass handed to him on the daily by your mom. And when you were young, you hated Mom for it. Now that you are older, you hate DAD.

We get it. We have seen your type before.

My recommendation is to get some cats, stay riding the cock carousel in the great white north, fuck a new martial arts instructor, and keep plugging away on Tinder. You have made your "metaphorical bed" and you are now doomed to sleep in it until you die - one way or the other.

Good luck, and happy ice fishing.

Cavannah · 2019-08-05T20:45:49+00:00

Looking for a man... not a man-child

Every male 18 or older is a man. I'm waiting with bated breath to hear what you believe comprises a "man."

An equal partner who has his shit together and strives to continually grow

That's pretty vague. Anyone who isn't an abject failure who's also slowly inching their way up a corporate hierarchy fits this bill.

I'm independent with an amazing career that I love

Nobody cares. These are the traits you're looking for in a man, so you project them on yourself. No man who "has his shit together and strives to continually grow" wants an inferior wannabe-man for a relationship partner.

I enjoy [a bunch of things that you actually value in the man of my choosing]

See previous

I'm in construction, and [I'm a hard-nosed insufferable post-waller who has a trashy attitude and]

See previous

Big fan of banter, not so much of endless messaging

Nobody fucking cares.

You bring nothing to the table, can't even articulate what specifically it is that you want, and portray yourself as an underdeveloped male impersonator.

Not interested.

meerita · 2019-08-05T22:25:31+00:00

Every single "strong woman" I've been into in the end showed to be bipolar syndrome or really insecure. They feel stronger, they try to shame you but it's easy for you to control the situation: you show them you don't give a fuck. Their amazing and playing cards castle crumbles with a gentle breeze. Remember the important lesson: never give them reason to believe you can't live without them, it will be your end.

Emervila · 2019-08-05T18:58:43+00:00

Don't tell me is metaphorical when you have phantom pain issues, you wacko!

RealMcGonzo · 2019-08-05T19:12:45+00:00

In Dexter, he lives with this really cute blonde. Comes home from work, she's cooking dinner, looks really nice, wearing a dress.

Fuck my life.

GomezAt0ms · 2019-08-05T19:25:10+00:00

Is it a good idea to wear Chucks to go ice fishing?

Pretty sure she just tagged along for the Instagram opportunities

Dr_Bukkakee · 2019-08-05T20:10:45+00:00

I guarantee I can make this chick cry just by busting her balls.

RealMcGonzo · 2019-08-05T19:10:45+00:00

Maybe she should grow a beard, LOL.

OldFashionMarine · 2019-08-05T20:04:46+00:00

Me, me, me....I'm the best, what do you have? Ummm yeah I'm on OLD because no one can handle me. Lol....she's still lonely, go figure....

muricanwerewolf1 · 2019-08-06T03:32:33+00:00

That's kind of funny she needs a man not a boy, since constant insults and the inability to know how teasing will be received seem to me a sign of immaturity.

Being a teasing type myself I have a hard time understanding how people like this woman can't understand that teasing your lover or friends is about having the intimacy to make them laugh about their own foibles without feeling judged, it's not fucking combat. There are very few adults out there relative to everybody you meet who take themselves so seriously they can't take a joke from time to time, so if your jokes are upsetting people it must mean you are really bad at teasing and need to let that aspect of your "personality" go, or you're not actually teasing someone but bullying them by attempting to hurt their feelings under the guise of "just jokes". Either way it's on you for being an asshole. Since she felt the need to put this in her profile, I must assume she runs into this problem more than just once or twice.

That's not to say I'm not occasionally an asshole, but attempting to reframe assholery as "sass" and therefor literally blaming people you've hurt for their hurt feelings is an unbelievably shitty character trait, and that's charitably assuming hurting somebody wasn't actually the point.

captainsaveahoe69 · 2019-08-05T17:59:11+00:00

Not remotely attractive. Your "sass" doesn't get my dick hard lady. And no I'm not intimidated, I could break you in two if I wanted to.

KazarakOfKar · 2019-08-06T12:15:10+00:00

She sounds like she is looking for a fem-Lesbian to top , not a man.

mblazin1532 · 2019-08-06T15:53:43+00:00

She acts so masculine but how much you wanna bet that if she hit a dude and that dude defended himself and hit back she would suddenly become feminine and cry and scream "you just hit a woman!?"

SolidFinding · 2019-08-06T13:53:09+00:00

She just sounds like she's raging because her MT trainer isn't interested in her or just has a lot of younger, more feminine options. Or perhaps only the lowly, low-status, randy labourers, and not the surveyor/construction manager dudes at work, show her any interest (sorry, not interest, I mean "harassment"). What does she want now? To plough some poor beta homemaker type dude up the ass with a 12-inch strapon??

Aldabruzzo · 2019-08-06T15:45:48+00:00

Translation:

Superbitch domme looking for a beta bitchboi with a job and a submission complex. You will submit to me. I'm a bicurious dyke wannabe who likes traditionally masculine pursuits. So you will have to like feminine pursuits.

I work around guys with cocks bigger than mine, so if you don't want to get the literal shit pegged out of you, you best be packin'. I'm a fucking bitch on wheels. I am used to talking shit with guys and you're no exception. Bonus points if you're an even bigger bitch than I am.

tysonsmithshootname · 2019-08-06T17:06:27+00:00

Ugh, I have a mirror if I want to be see someone who grabs their crotch, farts loudly, and is capable of doing manual labor. I do my male activities by myself or with other men, I don't need some fucking "badazz bitch" hanging around and pouting about a joke I made to my friends.

tysonsmithshootname · 2019-08-06T17:10:16+00:00

I think she is really looking for this:

She comes home, grunts at him. He runs up dutifully with her Miller High Life. She settles into the recliner, kicking off her boots. She farts and burps her way to dinner. She scarfs down whatever dish he was working on all day. He secretly resents she doesn't acknowledge his cooking.

Once it's time for bed, she puts on her strapper and goes to town on the poor guy. He wonders, "is this love??"

She rolls over, letting out one last fart in bed. She snores through the night as he quietly weeps.

GamingYourMom · 2019-08-06T19:59:58+00:00

That's cool. Put her ass on a scale.

ka0t1k · 2019-08-08T07:51:34+00:00

this feminist was sold the lie that she could drink and smoke and be masculine and there wouldn't be any repercussions...lol

RRFdev · 2019-08-09T13:16:47+00:00

A manchild in women's lingo - > A man who is not willing to spend money for women.

Has his shit together - > 6 figures money in bank account + country club membership + more than one car + more than one house. Actual self-sufficient men need not apply.

Strives to continually grow -> So she doesn't have to. Beta bux-seeking hypergamy chaser. Aspires to be a fat bum SAHM after marrying a man who 'has his shit together'.

DashingWolf · 2019-08-12T21:47:12+00:00

All the time, Independent, sass, strong woman. If you have to say it, it is not real.

Title	Strong, independent woman requires her suitors to compete in a dick-measuring contest before giving her commitment.
Author	diggydawgie
Upvotes	123
Comments	62
Date	August 5, 2019 5:55 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/cmedpa/strong_independent_woman_requires_her_suitors_to/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/strong-independent-woman-requires-her-suitors-to.344676 https://theredarchive.com/post/344676

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