"I am irresponsible, immature, already have two kids with a deadbeat; but I'm not looking for games!"

Autisticus · 2019-06-17T00:40:03+00:00

You love music? Holy shit you are so unique and different

Tracergold · 2019-06-17T01:03:07+00:00

Jesus, this girl is fucked. Pun intended.

She has NOTHING to offer. She is an anchor; she is a drain; she is a money pit. And yet her profile STILL has her positioning herself as the one in power, the one who will toss aside anyone under 6ft, while she sorts through her line of hundreds of NFL quarterbacks.

God damn, American society is fucked.

Older_Miggy · 2019-06-17T00:53:14+00:00

Single mother.

Pregnant at 19.

Shitty partner decisions.

Nose piercings.

Granted I wasn't exactly a millionaire business owner with 6 pack abs when I was 21, still how does one fuck up so much, so bad, so early in life?????

Velvet_Hammer_ · 2019-06-17T01:14:24+00:00

I see right through the "always working", "work two jobs", "hard workin' mama" cliches they always put on their profiles. As if that is an ingrained trait that suitors are just going to have to deal with. Does anyone honestly believe that she wants to spend the next 50 years of her life "almost always working" while her kids are in daycare? Of course not, she wants to lay around smoking weed all day while putting in a different DVD for the kids she's neglecting, while YOU pay for all of the bills because YOU are now "almost always working". Then, of course, she just has to cheat because you "just aren't spending time with her anymore". [OP, check back in 5 years and I'll bet she's still on the market but has added 1-2 more 'miracles'.]

ChineseExecutionVan · 2019-06-17T02:18:51+00:00

What kind of a hike involves a 1.5 year old and a pregnant lady?

Chairman_Ellen_Pao · 2019-06-17T00:44:15+00:00

Why do they all like horror movies? Seriously. Why? Someone psychoanalyze them, please.

Planner_Hammish · 2019-06-17T01:48:08+00:00

What she says: "I'm VERY playful"

What she means: "I will play games and shit test you until you lose your freaking mind".

FactCheckOnTheFly · 2019-06-17T02:45:45+00:00

“I let a man spray my uterus and bounce, and I’m another example of the degeneracy of western society.”

If you’re a student of history this was the downfall of the Roman Empire. When women would go fuck the gladiator slaves and the Huns were at the gates, men simply put down their swords because they didn’t see anything worth fighting for. This is HEDONISM.

But hey “live laugh love muah!”

lorem6300118 · 2019-06-17T02:27:57+00:00

The father is elsewhere, for five to ten years, until one day...he isn’t.

NickTesla2018 · 2019-06-17T01:35:31+00:00

Could have spent a few bucks on condoms instead of that stupid nose ring. Like one of the cows on granddad's farm.

hozarkmoca · 2019-06-17T01:35:41+00:00

Man this chicks just out the gates and already fked... can we fast forward 10 yrs and see how it pans out? My guess is 1 or 2 more kiddos. When she’s 30 she’ll look very rough and will be pleading for a genuine real man to sweep her and her children off their feet.

CoMaBlaCK · 2019-06-17T02:53:30+00:00

Imagine being a 21 year old girl who’s worth is zero? It’s more likely than you think.

Throwaway17n10 · 2019-06-17T03:04:46+00:00

I wonder how common it is for male dating profiles to say "You must be able to tolerate X about me."?

I bet it's pretty unusual.

Dustin44655 · 2019-06-17T02:18:10+00:00

So you like horror movies? Got news for you babe – you are living in one.

DeeplyDisturbed1 · 2019-06-17T12:17:03+00:00

Strawberry Shortcakes! What's up girl?!

Im a single mommy

What's with all the single moms requesting IM's (Instant Messaging). Am I that old?

Never mind...don't answer that.

Anyhow. What can we do for you today?

One is one and a half

Um. Damn. Is this some sort of riddle?

OK. I give up. What's the answer?

and I'm currently pregnant with the other two.

Ok then. Be that way.

Twins! Great news for you and your man. We are so happy for you. But that does not explain the dour look on your face in that photo. Why so glum?

The father is elsewhere...

Oh. I see. You are one of THOSE. Damn. I would piece my nose too. I feel you Strawby-cakes. Sucks to be you.

So let me get this straight - he forcibly raped you without a condom despite your protestations - but only after, months earlier, forcing you to stop taking the pill (or Depo-provera, or IUD, or Norplant. etc.) That evil bastard even waited to ensure you were at your most fertile, and he imprisoned you so you could not take the morning after pill, and kept you locked up so you could not get an abortion. Damn, this guy is literally Satan.

Will not be present

So you had him locked up? Good on you Straws. Good on you.

I'm chill

Wait - WHAT! Woah Straws. Right now you should be getting help for your trauma. WTF are you doing right now?

Artsy, love music

Well. Okay. Art Therapy. We can get behind that.

Am almost always working.

Good! Those two little 'uns are going to eat a lot. Plus, work clears the mind and all...

So what are you looking for?

Not looking for a fling or some fake shit

Well, after what you've been through, I would imagine all dating would be off the table for a while, but that's none of my business.

So what do you do with your free time?

I'm always down for a hike or a good movie

That sounds wholesome!

Horror is my favorite.

Hmmm. Troublesome sexual behavior (or rape, not sure), piercings, red hair, and horror movies...)

Damn. This is sounding like Daddy issues Straws. Did someone hurt you? How can we help?

Gotta be able to tolerate my dry sense of humor.

Yeah, sometimes that is code for "I do not have a sense of humor, I just make weak attempts at humor and guys laugh because they want to fuck me so I walk around thinking I am funny - but I am not funny to most people - so I call my humor 'dry' because some people don't seem to get it. Especially other women"

Moving along.

Can't always be serious

Oh, trust me Straws, we like to have fun as much as the next guy-- or girl.

I'm VERY playful.

Geez. That is sort of cringey Strawberry Shortcakes. Given the fact that you have a kid and two on the way and you are offering up, what could be perceived as, subtle sexual innuendo.

Okay. I think we have heard enough.

Good luck with your quest for finding someone who is not "fake shit" to help raise your three babies, with your young, face pierced, dry/boring, depressed, fake eyelash wearing, horror movie watching self.

ugluk1 · 2019-06-17T02:03:21+00:00

Go on a hike with me, be a good doggie and maybe I'll let you smell my bush.

Imperial_Plastics · 2019-06-17T14:12:28+00:00

That face has been spackled with more loads than it has freckles... but some idiot(s) still managed to bury a couple up in her.

MRP50 · 2019-06-17T11:07:13+00:00

She forgot to mention that she likes anal...

JohnQPubliq · 2019-06-17T13:51:55+00:00

And there it is again that disgusting nose ring that every whore in this generation always seems to have.

Its like a tramp stamp. If a tramp stamp was less classy and dignified.

Ted_Kool · 2019-06-20T03:55:08+00:00

It's a damn shame. She's kinda cute. It really is too much to see women throw away their genetics and their life so recklessly- and so early on too. Worst part is that this situation isn't incredibly rare.

TomahawkSuppository · 2019-06-21T12:47:11+00:00

21 and two kids. This is why I laugh when I hear people screaming about how selfish it is for men to go their own way and not procreate with women.

SamsAdvice · 2019-06-17T16:05:32+00:00

"The father...is elsewhere"...but he isn't gone. She'll be visiting the father ;)

devok1 · 2019-06-18T15:53:24+00:00

npc #4445654345 looking for baillout

MikeHockinya · 2019-06-19T21:01:58+00:00

Father is elsewhere = prison

bablfish · 2019-06-20T06:31:29+00:00

It´s not called"artsy" ...its called artificial

Westernhagen · 2019-06-17T14:02:50+00:00

She doesn't look very happy and playful...

Minorkaos · 2019-06-17T14:11:59+00:00

What the fuck is with the nose piercing? I don’t understand how they think it’s attractive, with that said.

What a waste of oxygen this “strong and independent woman” is.

ImAWhoDat · 2019-06-18T01:36:30+00:00

Will not be present *for now.*

That'll change the first time she gets into an argument with her new simp and calls the person who *will not be present* to vent.

coiluniverse · 2019-06-18T23:18:50+00:00

We are all screwed. This woman is nothing but a black hole. Why do women get pregnant by Chad? Why don’t they just keep their legs closed and wait for a good man to marry them and then have children? Are they that stupid or brainwashed by feminism, or both?

[deleted] · 2019-06-19T09:13:13+00:00

I've been wondering about this "dad is not in the picture" line that seems so common in these profiles. Is that supposed to make her more attractive or something?

oh_no_aliens · 2019-06-19T14:53:04+00:00

Desperate for that handout.

notyourdude201 · 2019-06-21T04:58:05+00:00

Fact: Every female with a male 'out of the picture' is carrying a big bag of emotional and social issues. Why do you think the previous male dumped her in the first place? It's obvious.

You don't believe me? Scan her words.

am almost always working.

Translation: doesn't actually want a relationship. She just kinda wants it.

Not looking for a fling or some fake shit

Projecting. She's a whore whose prime strategy for attracting men is to slut herself out.

I'm always down for a hike or a good movie

Translation: That you and you alone will provide with no expenses nor contributions given by her. Ask her what's her favorite camping spot or favorite movie and you will get silence.

Gotta be able to tolerate my dry sense of humor

Translation: She makes very inappropriate, offensive remarks on you while chatting and you are supposed to be a beta pussy and joke it away.

and can't always be serious

Translation: I am dishonest and so should you.

I'm VERY playful.

Translation: I'm childish.

StrongAttitude · 2019-06-23T11:41:29+00:00

When women say they don't want games what they really mean is please play games on me. If you are a genuine and gentle man then you get dumped or cheated on real quick.

unpropaganda · 2019-06-25T02:35:22+00:00

Given the quality of the life she's led thus far, I doubt her "sense of humor" would pay her bills at the Laugh Factory.

Title	"I am irresponsible, immature, already have two kids with a deadbeat; but I'm not looking for games!"
Author	York_Phoenix
Upvotes	226
Comments	84
Date	June 16, 2019 10:52 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/c1g3rs/i_am_irresponsible_immature_already_have_two_kids/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/i-am-irresponsible-immature-already-have-two-kids.345280 https://theredarchive.com/post/345280

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