Warning for young men.

jkarovskaya · 2019-08-23T16:14:33+00:00

My adult sons are my best friends, but the path to get free of debt , child support, college payments, and the the fallout from all of it has left its mark.

40 years later, and MGTOW monk for 37, I still think about the life I might have had.

where_muh_good_mens · 2019-08-23T15:52:22+00:00

Praying for you brother. It'll soon pass (3 years?) and you'll be able to leave it all behind for your new life in sanctuary.

ben-anders · 2019-08-23T17:47:49+00:00

Suicide after enduring 15 years of suffering? You are almost at the finish line. Dont give up now. Only a couple years to go brother. Than you can build up your assets again and do whatever you like. Maybe retire in Thailand? My dad was nothing but an empty shell after my mother took him for everything. Now he's living like a king in Thailand. And she's alone rotting away in some homeless shelter or whatever. TIME IS ON OUR SIDE! These bitches might have the upper hand when they are young. But we men have the better long-term deal. Endure brother, things will get better.

iseehot · 2019-08-23T18:04:04+00:00

Young men are not being taught how dangerous sex is to their life.

Anshumansri · 2019-08-23T14:34:34+00:00

Women always get what they want if u leave them the option to

MafiosoMGTOW · 2019-08-23T20:18:32+00:00

Some good stats to remember also, Men peak at around mid 30s (34-36) and Women peak in early 20s (22-24). You don't even need to be worrying about having kids in your 20s. I rushed to have kids because my Ex was older, I sacrificed a lot for her and it meant nothing to her in the end. Build your life up, when you're ready to have kids (if you even want them) wait until you're established in your 30s, and get someone much younger than you.

Wizard1996 · 2019-08-23T14:54:33+00:00

Hope you will find freedom. I wish you the best.

thegl25 · 2019-08-23T15:13:14+00:00

Wrap it up every single time.

NathanHollister · 2019-08-23T14:34:44+00:00

Tl Dr get a vasectomy

ButteredPastry · 2019-08-23T19:55:31+00:00

ex LTR and I agreed to get an abortion 2 years ago, and while I do think about the "what if", I think I'm much happier without it.

Nothing wrong with having kids, it's just the system in the US of A that's fucked up. You are the bread winner so YOU should be the one that get to keep most of the custody (if not full) and any and every property. It makes zero sense to give it all to the woman, they are not as capable as men, and hell, there is a plethora of research out the that shows that fatherless homes cause young men to be criminals. I hope this doesn't happen to your boy

Wish you the best brother. Stay with us.

zibnafNL · 2019-08-23T16:57:02+00:00

I'm in the same place brother. Going on year 11 right now... but...

It's my second time.

If only I knew then...

MuchIndependence · 2019-08-23T22:49:20+00:00

Sorry about your misery, I've seen this happen to men I've known and it's really sad.

bugattikid2012 · 2019-08-23T23:10:59+00:00

Hey OP, if you need someone to talk to let me know.

As far as depression/suicide goes, daily exercise can seriously go a LONG way. If you're interested I can provide you with some incredibly informative videos, but the TL;DR is just to do some exercise for maybe 20-30 minutes minimum every day, and ensure a proper sleep schedule.

Ksa444 · 2019-08-23T17:28:43+00:00

Can confirm. Had a child with a women who is insane and a drug addict. Which is the only reason I have full custody. I never wanted kids. Now I absolutely love being a single dad because I make the rules, I don't pay a dime in CS, and I have complete custody. But my case is extremely rare and most men get bent over by the DCS. I'm getting a vsec this year my insurance covers all of it, never again.

[deleted] · 2019-08-23T18:22:13+00:00

True words. It's an eye opener for sure. And the kid might not even be yours either. Must save self first.

TigPlaze · 2019-08-23T19:06:43+00:00

Man, that's rough. Hang in there, brother. If you need support, get it. I hope you always have someone you can talk to.

nickaaster · 2019-08-23T20:23:55+00:00

So she fucked you up from age 20 to 35 or thereabouts. Your best years. You have a son you love, but she is his mother! That's hell bro. Be strong.

[deleted] · 2019-08-23T22:51:13+00:00

Thank you for the warning.

I’m 26. No kids. Single. I’m sorry about your situation.

It’s the reason I refuse to mix with women generally. Such a high price for so little in return.

Suicide is an option.

But understand it will affect your son if you do. He wants a dad who will try his best for him. We all want fathers like that. Be that for him.

facingattrition · 2019-08-23T23:18:39+00:00

Hang in there brother and thank you for sharing your story with the community.

Dagomer44 · 2019-08-24T02:11:16+00:00

Same exact thing happened to me. However, when my daughter was 14... my ex told my daughter I might not be her father. We don’t the truth. Maybe we will some day.

Fuck that cunt.

CoinSwapTrader · 2019-08-23T15:04:43+00:00

Sadly most alcoholics have to deal with women....or maybe it is most pussy addicts resort to alcoholism to cope with women...

Bloodrain_souleater · 2019-08-23T16:21:29+00:00

That's what happens when you fuck without protection. Always use protection even if she lied about the pregnancy thing there are various STDs that you can get by having unprotected sex . I don't actually feel sorry for you since you didn't bother to have the presence of mind to think about the Stds . You thought hey she cannot get pregnant it's okay to fuck her without a condom. Now you have to suffer the consequences. It's general knowledge and unless you are from some third world country you should have had access to condoms fairly easily.

LotBuilder · 2019-08-23T20:35:41+00:00

Dude, it’s not that big of a deal. Do not take your life. The kid will be awesome and you will be able to tolerate the girl in short spurts. You will move forward and be fine. Just never get married and you are gold.

Massgumption · 2019-08-23T21:04:42+00:00

Dude, if this happen then just disappear.

TheLastMgtow · 2019-08-24T06:45:37+00:00

Brother your situation sounds difficult. I would like to ask you a question though.

Firstly. I never wanted to have kids. And my first relationships were motivated by me wanting sex everyday. I always thought i would leave every girlfriend at some point, because i knew intuitively that the best in life is to be alone, instead of having a family or a kid to hold me back.

Now i know i would love my kids if i have them, obviously. But i simply dont want them. I prefer to live and die alone and dedicate all my life to myself and the things i like.

The thing i want to ask you is. If you could go back, would you not have this kid? Or is that thought stronger than you? Because as i see it, it seems most men are unhappy with their family life, but they cant even admit that they would prefer to be alone. As if it some kind of blasphemy to say, that you would rather not have the kids, because that would for some stupid people, mean that you do not love them.

So i see this everywhere, married and cucked men, saying oh never get married, its hell. And also "Dont have kids", but also, "I love my kids, and cant live without them." From someone from my perspective it sounds like you are all insane, or addicted to the emotions and chemicals sparked by having kids. I know this to be true, because i happen to start relationships as a free alpha, and not even 2 months in and i start changing, and i think this is biochemistry. It can only be.

Anyways. If a thot tries to spermjack me to enslave me. I will leave my country and become a migrant for 10 years. No way im feeding that behavior, and selling my soul for that.

And as for your addiction to alcohol, thats not good. But who can judge you man, you need some sort of coping mechanism. And the situation does not look easy for you. I would say leave it, and kill yourself in the gym if you must, not in feminized addictions like consuming a beverage, think about that. But im judging you from my position, and that is easy. So if you remain an alcoholic, look, there are things that are worse, and at least you are here in mgtow, it means you still have empathy for other men and you still have a soul.

Id like to help you if i could. But i believe only you can really help yourself.

Remember here there are men that think pretty much alike you. And that we are all fighting our own battle. So stop that cycle man, and start helping yourself and us, men from over the world who want to be free and thrive. Its not late for you, you learn with those mistakes.

[deleted] · 2019-08-23T14:59:21+00:00

Bro don't ! We are all here for you ! We care about you more than your ex wife, and we never met.

Just find some occupations in order to keep your brain from thinking about all those bad stuff.

Sports, music, reading, getting into real old movies are all nice exemples :)

geralt_targaryen · 2019-08-23T15:53:05+00:00

If she wants to get married at 21 then she wants kids and if you don't want to get married so young she WILL have an accident . Be very careful with women who want to get married young...

The ones who marry young get fat quick and pump out kids refuse sex and then end up bitter single mothers by 30.

SlainFunicle · 2019-08-23T17:10:12+00:00

you only have 3 more years you have already done the hard part and make sure to inform your son don't make him fall into this trap women are liars never trust what they say i don't even leave my condoms i discard them myself

thelookoutbelow · 2019-08-23T17:53:10+00:00

May your mistake light the way for others

gsharm · 2019-08-23T20:07:50+00:00

It's not what happens to you that defines you, it's how you let it shape you. You're a sword that's been tempered by many fires. That makes you valuable. It makes you great. This isn't some "don't kill yourself things are great!" bullshit, I'm just telling you the truth. Pour your energy/despair into writing perhaps. Turn weaknesses in strengths. Switch your vices - for example: instead of alcohol try tea and bacon.

humpty_dumptyyy · 2019-08-23T20:23:12+00:00

I know a dude with this exact same story....do we know each other bro?

CnoelC · 2019-08-23T20:57:33+00:00

See I had a very similar situation but in the end it actually was the best thing for me. Prompted me to get my shit together and I have a much better quality of life now, a good career and direction in life.

A major factor to my story not being a sob story is that I don't pay support. I pay for all the extra curricular stuff but I would be doing that if I was the only parent anyway. Also I have 2 son's so I don't have to worry about a daughter turning on me in her teens.

The boys love me much more than their mother.

l-lincoln · 2019-08-23T21:40:30+00:00

Only a few years left until you can see your son without having to go through her. I've been where you are. The bad years will become a fuzzy memory.

markentingh · 2019-08-23T22:02:08+00:00

Same scenario happened to me when i was 26 and I pay $500/mo child support now at the age of 36, son is 10 yrs old, but I am still able to put $2,000 in my savings account every month and get to spend time with my son, and his mother invites me over for dinner on occasion. She's a nice woman, owns her own business, we are both somewhat immature adults, I'm like a grown manchild autistic software developer, she is able to rent her own office space & large house and do work as a freelancer and somehow manages to pay all her bills, and neither of us own a car. My son is a highly confident nerd who stands up to bullies, I am his hero even though I wasn't a part of his life for 7 years... not all is lost, as long as you can get a good paying job and stay away from marriage and have a kid with a mentally stable woman, make $75k/yr salary, you can pay child support and have a good life and own a house and have many toys of your own.

Lebensmaler · 2019-08-23T23:50:24+00:00

These are the last five kilometres of the marathon. Endure, man. You cannot quit now. You will get there.

SupaFlyslammajammazz · 2019-08-24T01:07:48+00:00

I’m also going on 15 years. Happy anniversary to us brother.

_MCMXCVI_ · 2019-08-24T01:34:27+00:00

Im so sorry, man... please try everything you can to keep moving forward. I know you'll always be involved with that woman through your child, but stay strong brother. Suicide doesn't need to be the answer :(

scocasso · 2019-08-24T07:36:40+00:00

Shiiiit, don't even THINK about suicide -- she'd LOVE it if you killed yourself. Keeping alive, and staying strong is like a thorn in her side, man.

_____ape_____ · 2019-08-24T10:55:47+00:00

Dude across the street is 26, he got married and had two boys at age 24, she's gone now. She moved across the country and took the kids simply because she doesn't want to live here anymore. he's trying to get them back but it's not looking good. He admits that they did all of this too fast and too young. Now he just works himself to death to not have to think about it too much. I can only imagine what he's truly feeling deep down inside. And let me tell you it feels good as fuck to have never taken that path in life.

strainer123 · 2019-08-24T16:59:39+00:00

Wait, she told you she couldn't get pregnant, and without proof you still came inside her? Wow, just wow.

SimpyMcSimpface · 2019-08-23T15:36:17+00:00

Let me give you an alternative viewpoint that may not be popular on this sub, but which I feel is fully in alignment with MGTOW values.

I have 4 different kids now with 4 different thots. (I'm an older guy.) I don't bemoan the child support I pay whatsoever. I get to be a dad (which is awesome) on the weekends and holidays, and I have the remaining 80% of my time to be a single dude, get wasted, chase tail, ride my bike, or sleep til noon and play video games if I fucking feel like it. I don't have to put up with a wife or girlfriend bitching or telling me how I can spend my money or time, yet I get the benefit of seeing my progeny grow up. It's the best of both worlds. Yes it's expensive but so are all the good things in life. The amount I pay in support is far far less than it would have cost me to hire a surrogate, go thru the legal maneuvers to get custody of my kids as a single dad, and hire a nanny to watch them 24/7. It's the best money I spend.

1 or 2 of my babymommas are dumb crackhead hos and I continually have to correct the fucked up damage they try to do to the kids, but that's not a problem with the overall strategy. It's a problem with the tactical execution in that I should have chosen better candidates to implement my strategy.

In NO circumstance, though, should you feel obligated in any way outside of child support to the thot. Love your son, F her. The statement in your post which really bothers me is " I was on the verge of breaking up with her a couple weeks before she told me." DUDE. Break up with her anyway, and carry on being an awesome dad.

Title	Warning for young men.
Author	humaphobe
Upvotes	573
Comments	68
Date	August 23, 2019 2:32 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MGTOW
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MGTOW/comments/cuep4y/warning_for_young_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MGTOW/warning-for-young-men.406623 https://theredarchive.com/post/406623

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