Take responsibility for your actions

oldslut · 2017-10-08T11:51:20+00:00

you can either go through life with a victim mentality, blaming everyone and everything else, or take life by the balls, accept total responsibility, and kick ass. fuck that victim mentality, it's for beta losers

IwannaFocus · 2017-10-08T12:39:58+00:00

Your problem is that you are putting the woman on a pedestal here. Being good enough? Being her rock, her lobster, her fucking tampon? Alright. Then let me ask you something; what will she bring in return? Think about that long and hard before you start making threads like these.

I'm not gonna bend my back backwards for a pussy that will not bother to do the same for me. If she wants all that, she better start doing the same. Will she tho? Outside of sex, how will she keep me occupied without actually being interesting? With seduction, excitement and romance? Hahahaha

JcHgvr · 2017-10-08T12:01:21+00:00

So what you're saying is that my only two options are :

Accept all of the responsibility

Accept none if it

There's always going to be someone better than you. As far as the divorce goes. What you just said is that in the marriage a man has to put in all the work. The seduction, the romance and the excitement basically doing all the work and just so she doesn't go sucking dicks ? Sounds blue to me.

Poofysmoof · 2017-10-08T13:17:38+00:00

I've wanted to post something like this in Marriage and Divorce subs. This is the underlying message of Redpill for men in a relationship. All the comments there are more like seek counseling, communicate more, try adjusting to her needs. These are men that are at the end of the rope, I mean they are asking for advice from some internet strangers. Its entertaining to see issues that could be fixed if they would come to these other subs. If those men would take this message and internalize it, it would help some. Of course not all like you said because some partners have already checked out. I've told many though, even if she has checked out wouldn't it be better to move forward in life as a better version of yourself.

AstuteBlackMan · 2017-10-08T17:58:25+00:00

Agreed. Most men here probably fucked up their marriage because they were simps and simps. Never took charge and let the woman make decisions. Huge turnoff. She then views you as a kid.

A good example of a male to emulate is Lavar Ball. Dude has all his kids riding with him and his wife follows too. He's tough yet also understanding. More importantly lets his wife know he's always there for her.

I'd really like to see men take responsibility for why they failed

Dead__Hand · 2017-10-08T11:59:50+00:00

I agree with your last post, but I completely disagree with your followup.

The fact is, if you were good enough, she wouldn't have cheated.

This is a common trope thrown at women: "if you would just do x, then y would not have happened" and shows a complete and total inexperience with marriage on any level beyond speculation or being in your honeymoon phase.

You can do everything possible for your partner. Remember that it only takes one moment of weakness to make a huge mistake, no matter how amazing your partner is. It did not stop my ex from throwing away over a decade of marriage because of unresolved "asian fetish" in which he literally took the first Filipino chick who threw herself at him. This was with constant sex, affection, and support. There was nothing I could have done, short of developing a brain hacking tool to remove any fetish for wanting to fuck Asian women that barely speak English.

Likewise: no amount of "omg be her rock and supportzzzz" will stop a woman from having moments of weakness in which she fucks someone else if she lacks basic discipline and decides 1 - 2 decades in to the marriage that's "who she is, deal with it".

People aren't fucking mind readers.

Divorce

This whole paragraph veers off in to retard territory. You do realize that people are more than willing to sabotage and convince themselves of anything they can to justify their immediate wants, right? I've listened to other women justify, and "pre-rationalize" why they cheat/will cheat, over the dumbest reasons and all because they have no other reasons beyond "me me me want want want" and it always goes the same damned way: Person A gets feefees/tingles for another person despite being in a relationship. Person A tries to look for reasons why current relationship is bad and how much better Person B would be. Person A escalates decline of relationship in the hopes it will end and resolve the dissonance.

People will do stupid shit they otherwise would not do just to satisfy immediate wants: this applies to men and women.

It is clear you have a lot... like... a LOT left to learn about relationships/marriage/etc. I'm not entirely sure you're in a position to be actually lecturing anyone here about it.

jtv907 · 2017-10-08T15:14:50+00:00

I don’t agree with this entirely. If a woman cheats on a man (and vise versa) then it’s both of their faults for not communicating what was wrong with the relationship. Instead they skip right to the pain of cheating.

This wouldn’t happen if they sit down and talk through what needs to be changed. All relationships need tweaking every now and then so it’s up to the couple to figure their shit out. Most people just don’t see it this way.

menial_optimist · 2017-10-08T18:02:11+00:00

I'm all for taking responsibility, but I find when I started doing so that I was almost doing everything wrong.

red_matrix · 2017-10-08T18:58:49+00:00

Fuck that. The world doesn't owe you shit. And I don't owe the world a god damn thing. The universe doesn't care about anything - it just is and always will be. We were born into the fourth turning - accept that. All you can do is ride the tiger and enjoy the decline.

Andrew54321 · 2017-10-08T21:53:53+00:00

Nah this concept steps on too many toes on this sub.

DrBarnabyJonesJr · 2017-10-08T13:48:00+00:00

Okay, so some guys think I'm advocating marriage in this post. I'm not. In fact - AVOID MARRIAGE LIKE THE PLAGUE. However, I know for a fact that it can be done in the modern world. How do I know this? Because of my father. He and my mum have been together since they were 18 (they're now in their 40s). They only married a few years ago, in a registry office, with us kids as witnesses. And we went on a caravan holiday for their honeymoon.

Do you understand the level of influence he has over my Mum? Do you think that he's a beta bucks to her? I've seen her go from full force nagging, to complete silence, because of a look from him. This is the home I come from.

'Overman,' you say 'surely your dad came from a great household with a strong father figure of his own, that's why he's this way!'

Nope. He was raised in a council house, by a mentally ill single mother.

When I tell you to take responsibility in your relationships and life in general, I'm not making this shit up. It's the greatest lesson my father has taught me, and now I'm passing it on to you guys.

Augustine2017 · 2017-10-08T17:50:25+00:00

Thank you for posting, OP. I'm not sure I agree with everything you've said, but your basic point -- "self-responsibility" -- is something a lot of TRP/MGTOW people need to hear.

Do we face a lot of difficulties in society, in women, in others? Yes. BUT we can never shirk our duty to accept responsibility for our own actions, whatever those are.

Like you said, we must happen to life, not the other way around.

[deleted] · 2017-10-09T02:51:26+00:00

I like your general message, but its kinda dumb in its own way.

Are people all they can and what they should? Hell no, the average guy is a fat lazy blobb of boringness. Can they improve? Hell yeah!

Does society suck? Yes. Is that a problem? Yes. Can we do something about it? Yes. So, whats the problem?

Institutional change and cultural drifts are long-term. Personal success doesn't happen over night, its at least medium-term. What you can do is own your shit, that is indeed short-term. Yes, you need to build up from short-term, to medium-term to long-term goals.

So, why is your proposal kinda dumb? Because fixing society is not a "everyone wants the same" thing. People working more efficiently on their goals doesn't mean they have the same goals. And everyone owning their shit simply means more competition. This will not change how women work. All we do with this, is change guys ito generally hotter guys, which is good for women, but doesn't do shit for men. I can live with myself being a fat blobb, if only women would love me for it. Which they don't. And looking muscular and hot is only a bonus, if its not normal. The average guy still gets nothing.

Or in other words: Fixing yourself as a man only works as long you are one of the few guys doing. If everyone starts fixing their shit, you will be stuck in your more or less average life. And as you said yourself, the average dude gets nothing. Fixing society on the other hand will take decades easily. If its possible in the first place.

So, you are preaching a nice message, which is still blue pill deep down. The only reason you can win as an average dude is because the others straight suck. Once everyone starts to become the machiavellian dude you describe, people might not only be stuck on the same level as before, but instead we suddenly life in a cut-throat do-or-die world. You might like that, most guys don't. Especially if they still get cheated on, because the next guy is still better than them. The difference is, now its not a question of being to fat and lazy, but of being objectively inferior. Good luck dealing with that and still trying your best.

That would be a more honest message. If you are a guy, dream big and hope for it to happen, because everyone below the top 20% will get nothing. Just...the second you tell that to everyone, the 80% of losers will simply drop out and society collapses.

Excuses are weak, yes. But try to look into your mirror and say to yourself: "I'm not good enough to compete against other males and always will be a shit-tier guy". Try to accept this as an objective measure of yourself. How can you not make up excuses at that point?

That is the real red pill. Not some lofty "You can make it!" speeches. Many can, yes. But not all. At the end of the day its still about the 80:20 rule and your women knows that, too. She doesn't give a fuck about fairness or your hard work, she wants her hottie for the moment and thats it.

Its lots of hard work for no gratitude and no promises whatsoever. Thats what being a man is. A quite brutal, short and thankless existance, which still might yield something great. If you happen to be in the top 1% of people who actually make an impact in our world.

[deleted] · 2017-10-09T15:05:15+00:00

you are too young and dumb to be posting advice to anyone, anywhere, let alone here

Title	Take responsibility for your actions
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	39
Comments	43
Date	October 8, 2017 10:58 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/7512un/take_responsibility_for_your_actions/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/take-responsibility-for-your-actions.46410 https://theredarchive.com/post/46410

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