Children Only Do What You Let Them

Just as children require boundaries to be safe, I am going to demonstrate that women do also.

Recently I was taking care of some kids, I realized they are the ultimate frame testers. They will test everything you say to see if you are serious, and see if they can provoke you. I was asking myself "should I even have a boundary for that?" many times (ie sitting on my lap in an uncomfortable position). In the short time with these kids I learned that the calmer and firmer I was with boundaries, the more well behaved and sweet the kids were. Here is a study that shows kids feel safer when they have an established boundary (in this case a fence), and play and explore more. Kids have a need to exist within boundaries. I am theorizing that women share this trait (among others) with children, in other words they do not grow out of it. The thing I realized is kids only do what you let them (yes it's a generalization that isn't always true). If you let kids constantly nag you about something and you eventually give in, they will continue to do that. The parent who doesn't tolerate incessant nagging gets nagged a lot less. The father who does not allow his children to yell "DAD!" a dozen times from a different room to gain his attention, and rewards them with his attention when they seek it in a way he approves ensures children fall into his frame.

The basis of my hypothesis is that men are designed to lead, and women are designed to follow. Men are unique in that they do not require boundaries to feel safe/operate normally, yet can work within them.

Let's delve in on the psychological implications of this. Women have a strong desire to fit in, far more so than men. Some things that women do that reveal this are:

• Strongly enforce social norms. They do this to make sure the things they value are the way things are, as a way of being a part of the group.
• Care more about vapid stories about people rather than interesting things or learning (i.e. watching keeping up with the Kardashians).
• Will constantly test others (different from a shit test) to see if they are an 'us' or a them; seeing if they understand social convention as they see it.
• They NEED people to like them. Women who are publicly disliked often end up having mental breakdowns, and either fall or hamster their way to ultimate victim status.

**An important note about this list is that women are constantly on the job of 'self PR agent', so be wary.

These are all traits of a follower. Followers must be lead, and boundaries must be established. Women also, only do what you let them. They have an innate need to exist within a system, and to have any attraction to a man they must exist within HIS system. This is the idea of frame and respect. If a man loses frame or respect, he loses attraction.

If a women calls for you from another room do you acknowledge it, or do you require that she comes to you if she wants something? If you respond that she must come to you to talk, that is a boundary she can adhere to, and will feel better to exist in. Conversely if you respond by acknowledgement, you've just shown a hole in your fence (frame). If we continue with the analogy of a fence, a man without a fence knows his property line at least in an abstract way, but if someone comes along they do not know where his property ends and another begins, and if the man doesn't have a fence marking his property line, how will they know when they're trespassing? If a woman/women is on your property, how does she know what areas of your property to explore and enjoy? She may end up on another's property.

**I've just run out of time, I may update and fix this post, as I realize it is very fragmented. If anyone wants to give specific criticism to help me improve my writing, I would appreciate it.