When someone I don't really know says he's getting married, it's always been a bit of dilemma.

Sure, you can try to explain what a terrible idea it is, that most end in divorce under unfavorable terms, and that inviting the state into a three-way with you and your significant other is stupid. Such behavior will not make you popular.

Instead, I'm going to start going with a question: Did you get a better prenuptual agreement?

If they got a prenup, congratulate them on their wisdom and move on. More likely that they say "What? No, we're not getting a prenup" and possibly they hamster on about unicorns and NAWALT and one in a million (instead of 3 in 10 or whatever.) This is my chance: I explain that marriage is also a statutory agreement, and that it has terms governing it's dissolution as well. I outline them:

  • Cause not required
  • Alimony
  • She gets half of assets, regardless of relative contributions
  • You get half of debt, regardless of what it paid for
  • Presumption of female child custody
  • etc. etc.

So rather than saying "Don't get married, you chump!" as I want to, I can simply lump all the legal defects of marriage together, call that the "default prenup", and suggest getting a better one.

I hope this little dose of reality tends to go down better than an outright attack on the institution.

Edit: Formatting