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The_King_Hudson
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[–]privacythrowaway20031 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
How can I be less invested yet still open to the possibility of being hurt?
That sentence doesn't make sense to me, why would you want to be open to being hurt ?
Are you wanting to actually date these women, or are you wanting to plate them and ending up with oneitis ?
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I mean that I'd like to be able to allow myself to be more vulnerable, rather than push people away every time I feel a bit of doubt or anxiety.
[–]privacythrowaway20035 points6 points7 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Something I realized as I got older, was that you simply can't control whether or not someone is going to cheat on you.
You can be the most lovey-dovey, doting boyfriend on the planet. Or you can be the master of aloofness. Just remember AWALT, and that as soon as she finds someone who gives her the tingles, your turn is likely over.
Just worry about what you can control, and forget the rest.
[–]ModeratorPaperStreetVilla1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You are asking how you can dry up her attraction to you.
Youre stuck in tye madinna whore. Complex, get onto rollos work, because your. Mental model is fucked
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm pretty sure I'm not stuck in the Madonna Whore Complex. That's not the problem.
[–]haveagoodlaugh[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
i'm pretty sure you're just over-thinking everything bud
out clubbing and living the wild and free lives
with girls like that it's only a matter of time.
enjoy it while it lasts. not yours only your turn blah blah blah
[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We want to relax. We want to be open and honest. We want to have a safe haven in which struggle has no place, where we gain strength and rest instead of having it pulled from us. We want to stop being on guard all the time, and have a chance to simply be with someone who can understand our basic humanity without begrudging it. To stop fighting, to stop playing the game, just for a while. We want to, so badly. If we do, we soon are no longer able to.
We want to relax. We want to be open and honest. We want to have a safe haven in which struggle has no place, where we gain strength and rest instead of having it pulled from us. We want to stop being on guard all the time, and have a chance to simply be with someone who can understand our basic humanity without begrudging it. To stop fighting, to stop playing the game, just for a while.
We want to, so badly.
If we do, we soon are no longer able to.
https://therationalmale.com/2012/09/11/of-love-and-war/
[–]Miguelx741 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
How is she going to hurt you? Don't start thinking about it or define it. The possibility its always there and there is always certainty behind, its all about on how you deal with it. The only "hurting" that will happen will be her not talking to you anymore. Signs that she shouldnt be dealt with?, gtfo and accept shes not worthy enough for y ou to feel uncomfortable and accept the "loss". As for tips to maintain her..I'll keep it simple, do not look desperate or forcibly try to create some "frame" and appear as a NON NATURAL version of yourself, be lose, be cool and enjoy the very short or limited time you have with this woman/girl. Dont make it happen for her, make it happen for yourself.
That's a good response. I kind of know this too, but it's nice to have it put into perspective by someone else.
[–]Miguelx741 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think this is common knowledge that lives within most of us, it's all about internalizing, accessing it and really apply it in the real world.
[–]bama79rolltide1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Here is what works for me.
First of all, devalue the currency. (Women) In your mind, lower them three spots than what they actually are. If she's a nine, find reasons to prove she's a six. She wouldn't know why you don't kiss her ass like the nine you claim her to be.
You're going to have insecurities because competition is abundant. She knows this. You must maintain an abundance mindset. Understand that she may leave, flake, suck a cock, for virtually any reason she wants, and justify it to herself.
Also, if you're pulling nine's like that, who cares? You can clearly replace her. Knowing this eliminates foolishly investing too much into any woman. Remember their thinking and their nature. The rules are shit, but they must be adhered to when dealing with your emotional well being.
[–]1rporion0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Here is a thing I may have done in the past
If she acts really shitty I take her in front of a mirror and tell her:
"This is what I can pull. There are plenty of women, less attractive than you, that still get my dick mighty hard. And, the best thing is, they would jump on my dick because I banged you. Anything else?"
You can hear the wheels starting to spin after that.
[–]BusterVadge0 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would never allow myself to become controlling
Why not? Women love boundaries when you're in a LTR. If you're talking about plates then it don't matter, just keep finding more plates.
[–]justaskingman70 points1 point2 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
wild and free lives they should be living? you don't wanna be controlling? Future cuck alert.
My bitch (used lovingly) does not have facebook. Why does she not have facebook you ask? Because I asked her why she had it. Apart from keeping touch with friends and uni work stuff (group chats) - it didn't make sense. She agreed. So she doesn't have facebook anymore. She calls her friends and she calls her uni group for assignments and she calls her family too. Now, if she said she is still keeping it.. then I wouldn't keep her and she knew it.
Some would say that's controlling but it is not. I have a standard I do not compromise. She can either comply or not and then I'll make my choice (as she did in complying or not) and leave her. It's all voluntary and it's all honest and it works.
Be that kind of controlling. As in have your values and standards (not facebook shit, but life.. ways she acts with friends, out clubbing etc) and don't compromise and be prepared to take the loss and walk. Which you are not by the look of it. You will succumb to her expectations, instead of your own and before you know it, you'll be crying when she left you and you've placed her on this golden pedestal of pussy worship.
[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP-1 points0 points1 point 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Here's your advice: learn how to TRP and fuck off to AskTRP with questions. Learning yet?
[–]HAMMURABl-4 points-3 points-2 points 9 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You aint seeing a 9 faggot, stop being delusional
[–]thisornothing4 points5 points6 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Your insecurity is obvious to everyone you interact with.
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 1 point2 points3 points 9 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Haha. Well, that is a matter perspective, but I can certainly assure you I am.
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[–]privacythrowaway20031 point2 points3 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]privacythrowaway20035 points6 points7 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ModeratorPaperStreetVilla1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]haveagoodlaugh[🍰] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Endorsed ContributorAuvergnat0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Miguelx741 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Miguelx741 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]bama79rolltide1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1rporion0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BusterVadge0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]justaskingman70 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Senior ContributorNightwingTRP-1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]HAMMURABl-4 points-3 points-2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]thisornothing4 points5 points6 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]The_King_Hudson[S] 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link