What are the benefits of going no contact?

2020-05-17T21:25:17+00:00

You can finally think clearly and make plans for yourself.

ImPiqued1111111 · 2020-05-18T01:29:47+00:00

You will never get the closure you think you want.

Parking-Act · 2020-05-17T21:44:32+00:00

You chose yourself over some slimeball sucking the life out of you with a slow drip of torture.

You reclaim yourself and your freedom. You control your life again.

Does he know you are pregnant?

cirrus_cloud · 2020-05-18T05:40:45+00:00

Imagine how it will feel to text him an essay giving him a piece of your mind. And he responds “K”.

It’s highly likely. Men don’t give a F*CK about our emotions honey! There’s no amount of words on a screen that will get something through their thick skulls. He will probably brush you off and tell his friends what a psycho his ex is.

Don’t waste your time or energy.

2020-05-18T00:06:54+00:00

You can focus on yourself and enjoy doing what you want without the anxiety that comes with dating a NVM.

When I was dating men who didn't treat me well, I was always anxious from push/pull or trying to get and keep his attention. When you're single you don't have that anxiety - you can focus on you.

When you want to contact him:

Text a friend instead
Write a list of every boundary he has broken or any time he didn't treat you as well as you deserved and read it
Or come on here and read the male depravity/red flag flair

Doing all of this will really remind you of why you left.

Please take care of yourself and do the best for you and your baby <3

2020-05-17T21:49:28+00:00

Wait... you're pregnant? You absolutely DO need to prioritize your health and the health of the baby. Just look at r/BreakingMom and certain other subs to see what it is like to coparent with LVM. You want to avoid that, if possible. You don't want LVM around you or your baby right now.

Is this LVM the father?

YarikEnterprise · 2020-05-18T19:44:12+00:00

When you go no contact, you clarify your vision each day of the life you're building as one that doesn't include them.

It isn't romantic, but I went no-contact with my mother... Over five years ago? I can't even give you an exact number, and I count that as a victory. I set that pain aside and I focused on myself. I built a life for myself apart from her. And when the pandemic began and she contacted me, it was strange, the difference those years of building brick by brick, day by day my psyche and my life up without her there had made. I was able to be graceful. I told her we were safe, and happy, and that I wished her good health, but that she could never be a part of my life.

For context, I have complex PTSD from childhood abuse. I saw her picture once on Facebook by accident and when I looked over my Fitbit log after my heartbeat went up to 120 bpm just at the sight of her face.

But the time and space to build and heal without that person there allowed me to change myself that much. Imagine what you can accomplish with the wounds in your own heart given enough time.

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