When a guy sets a vague time to call

vp2407 · 2020-04-17T04:19:50+00:00

If you’re in quarantine and have nothing time-sensitive to do while you sit at home, then I wouldn’t care. But in normal day-to-day life I’d be annoyed. I know it’s not that deep since it’s just a phone call, but hear me out.

Dating aside, I can’t put up with people who don’t respect my time anymore and offer vague time slots that give me 0 info about how to plan for my day. It’s gotten to the point where it’s an issue near and dear to me because I used to bend over backwards to please friends that were like, “I’ll come over later today.” But then not give a specific time or respond to my follow up text asking when exactly. Or sometimes they say they’ll be somewhere at x time but show up 2 hours later. And i would get anxious, because now I’m supposed to shower and get ready? Or clean up? Or sit around twiddling my thumbs because idk if I have time to actually sit down and get any work done ? Fuck that noise.

It’s those people that say they’re on their way but are just getting in the shower, or that friend that shows up an hour late to a dinner, aka people who think the universe revolves around them. I had to distance myself from people like that and stop being eager to please friends and dates who literally won’t give me the time of day.

If you’re unreliable or have poor time management skills, I’m not going to scramble to accommodate you showing up to my doorstep at such short notice. I used to get stressed out when the guy I really liked told me he’ll call me later that day. And I was afraid I’d miss his call so I couldn’t focus on anything else and would just check my phone regularly (pathetic Ik). Now I’d say if you miss the call, you miss the call. In fact it’s better to be not so easily available versus waiting around like an anxious puppy. His time is not more important than yours, especially when he won’t give you the courtesy of a specific time.

mightbethrowawayyy · 2020-04-17T03:38:49+00:00

Sounds flaky and a little weird.

Just go on with your life and make other plans. Don’t save that time slot for him unless he confirms it

brainsandb00bs · 2020-04-17T07:40:05+00:00

I wouldn’t say anything more to him about that plan. Don’t pick up the phone when he calls on Saturday either. The next day when he asks why say he didn’t set a concrete time so you weren’t expecting a call at the hour he chose to call. Afternoon is way too vague and a huge block of time for him to expect you to be available for him. Then going forward you’ve now trained him to set concrete plans with you if he wants your time. I have a busy schedule so I l have to be ruthless in showing them how much more I value my time than I value their attention early on so they don’t waste my time or take it for granted. Treat them mean, keep them keen.

Even though it’s quarantine, think about how you want life to be after this is all over. Don’t give men any passes now that you wouldn’t be ok with in the past, they aren’t going to treat you any better once they have you or got a chance to sleep with you. You set the course for how you want to be treated right now.

I am actually busy right now with work so even though the world is locked down I’m open for business. It drives men wild, they don’t understand how I still have so little free time because I’m not too clear with them on why I’m so busy...just that I’m busy and they need to schedule plans with me like an adult. They’re curious to death what I do all day. I ignore them for hours, days at a time and they’ll still respond in seconds or minutes because I’ve taught them that my time is scarce and valuable. Right now men are flooded with bored PickMes lowering their value for attention. Switch the game up a little bit, keep them guessing.

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